


Lost Without You

by vampiregirl89



Category: My Chemical Romance
Genre: Age Difference, Alternate Universe - High School, Artist Gerard Way, Bullying, Drama, F/M, Homophobia, Homosexuality, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Implied/Referenced Sexual Harassment, Implied/Referenced Suicide, M/M, Teen Angst, Teenagers, Underage Drinking
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-09-21
Updated: 2017-08-29
Packaged: 2018-08-16 14:26:07
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 35
Words: 49,441
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8105875
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/vampiregirl89/pseuds/vampiregirl89
Summary: After many years Frank is going to stay at the Way's house again. But surely things would not be like when he was a child.





	1. Introduction

**Author's Note:**

> Hey!  
> I wrote this fanfic many years ago and never published.  
> As expected I'm doing some changes while I'm posting it. For the best, I believe :)
> 
> ALSO, the chapter 1 was supposed to be bigger but I decided to just make a small one as an introduction, just to see if you guys like the idea and everything. And to know if I should go on with the story. I have big plans for it. BIG. PLANS. :3
> 
> Enjoy reading!

*Frank's Pov*

"We're here Frankie!" the boy sighs and take his earphones off as he hears his mother calling him "Come on! I don't wanna lose the flight".

Frank gets out of the car and goes to the trunk to get his bag.  
Linda, his mom, closes the trunk and puts a hand on his shoulder as she notices how sad he looked. She smiles a bit sadly.

"Don't worry, love. I'm just going to stay as much as I need to. You know how much I'd rather not go, but..."  
"That's not the problem, mom. I know it's part of your job." he interrupts and rolls his eyes. Both of them hear the door being opened. "I like Mrs. Way. But I'm not a kid anymore to stay at her house! It's embarrasing to me."  
"Frank, we've talked about this" his mom says, losing her smile and looking serious now "For God's sake. We live in Jersey! I'd never leave you alone at home not even a week. Donna is my friend and she agreed happily with you staying."

Frank just looks down at his feet. There was no point arguing with her and he knew it. He also knew his mom was right to worry but he is sixteen now and the last time he stayed at Donna's house he was just nine. It would be weird for sure.

"Hello Linda! Frank!" Donna goes next to the car, smiles as she hugs Frank's mom.  
"Donna. I can't thank you enough for letting Frank stay. You don't know how much you are helping me."  
"Oh please! I know Frankie won't bring problems. He's a good boy." Donna smiled at Frank, who quickly smiled back and looked to the floor. He was very shy sometimes.  
"Well... I gotta go. Can't afford to get late!" Linda said and looked at Frank for a few seconds, then hugs him "I'll call when I get there. Promise. Please don't worry much, okay?".  
"It's okay... I know you will." Frank lets go off the hugh and smiles at her "But you don't worry either! I can take care of myself too".

His mom laughs and caress his face, she looked like she was just about to cry. It's been some time since they've been away from each other and it was hard, especially since she got divorced, Frank was basically the only important thing to her now.  
But she just nods and says goodbye to Donna, then she runs to get in the car, fearing she might get in a traffic.  
Frank and Donna watched the car until it disappeared in the end of the street. 

"Don't worry dear. I'm sure you'll love to stay here! Just like the old times, huh?"

• 

Frank wakes up with the sound of Donna singing from the kitchen. He sighs and looks for his bag to get his toothbrush. As her sons were alredy sleeping when Frank arrived, Donna thought it was a better idea that he slept on the couch for the night, to not wake them up.  
Frank is just about to get upstairs when the door opens. He stops, afraid.

"Uh..." it was a tall man with grey hair and holding a black suitcase. He finishes locking the door and sees Frank.  
"Oh, hello Frank. How are you?" the man smiled and walked into the kitchen. Frank looked as stupid as possible with his eyes wide and blank face. He was pretty sure Donna and Donald had got divorced some time ago. Wow, he really haven't seen them in years. Frank felt guilty. He basically didn't know them anymore and they let him stay at his house, with good will and for free. He decides he will think of a way to thank them later.

As Frank gets upstairs, he hears music as loud as Donna's singing. Except it was much heavier. He just didn't identify which band it was playing.  
He tries to open the bathroom door but it was locked. Seconds later it opens. 

"Holy shit! Frankie!" the boy got totally smashed into a hug. He gasped for air. "How long we didn't see each other! You didn't grow up at all."  
"Fuck, Mikey... Let him breath!" Frank hears another voice behind him. Mikey smiles and lets go of Frank."  
"Too bad I'm going out now. But when I come back I'll show you all my new games. W-Well... I hope you still like videogames." Frank nods and smiles slightly. Mikey lefts the bathroom and Frank was about to close the door when something stopped him.  
"Uh, hey? Hello to you too. I still live here, ya know" The taller black haired boy rolls his eyes as he gets into the bathroom and washes his face in the sink. It was Gerard, the older brother. Frank was surprised, actually. Gerard should be about 22 years old now... What the hell was he still doing in his parents house? Well, Frank didn't know much else about the misterious boy anyway. When Linda left him at their house, the older boy would always be locked in his room or something, they almost never talked. His memories about him were almost nonexistent.  
"H-Hello..." Frank murmured some time later.  
"So... How long are you going to stay here?" Gerard stares at him and Frank was pretty sure if the older boy had x ray vision Frank would nothing but smoke by now. Gerard surely knew how to be intimidating.  
"W-Well... I..."  
"I'll be honest." Gerard closes the door behind him. Frank looked scared as hell "I don't like at all the idea of a stranger being in my house. If I see you in our private rooms or trying to steal something I will..."  
"What?!" Frank interrupts, all his fears turned into rage "I would NEVER do that! What kind of person you think I am?"  
"Good." That is all Gerard says as he was about to leave, but turns around and says "By the way. My friends spend a lot of time here, so if you ever see them... Keep. Away." He leaves.

Frank just keeps staring the wooden door, wide eyed. Maybe his stay here wouldn't be so great.


	2. Chapter 02.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey!  
> I'm glad there are people reading :3 yay  
> I know it's not a big chapter but I really wanted to update as soon as possible. I have to enjoy since I didn't have class today lol
> 
> <3

*Frank's POV*

After settling in his new room -Gerard's room-, Frank decided it was time to do something to thank Donna's good will and show her he is not useless. After all, he wouldn't just stay in their house eating and sleeping the whole day and not doing anything to help.  
It wouldn't be hard since Donna works the whole day on her Beauty Salon and Frank noticed her sons are extremely lazy, so he decided to help with the house work. He was used to it since his mom was basically never home.  
It's about 15:30 pm alredy; Mikey is upstairs playing videogames (as always) and Frank is in the kitchen just finishing washing the dishes; the floor was impeccably clean and so was the living room. He's satisfied. If Donna noticed he was useful for something maybe his stay in their house would be a bit better. He was glad his mom has always been a perfectionist and taught him to be just the same.  
Frank was immersed in these thoughts until he hears the front door opening. He runs, still holding the wet cloth on his hands and wearing the stupid baby pink apron (the only one he found in the house) that he forgets to take off. However, it wasn't Donna that had arrived, as he thought. It was...

"Oh my god! What is this, Gerard? You never told us anything about your wife" Gerard enters the living room with his friends, who wouldn't stop laughing once they looked at Frank; The younger boy is blushing hard and scared to death when he sees the angry look on Gerard's face. It seems to be the only way he looks at him, he thinks. 

For Frank it wasn't a big deal though. Pink is just a color like any other! And an apron was made to no let your clothes get wet. It's that simple. Nothing much about it.  
But Gerard's facial expression showed he didn't share the same thought.

"Frank. What did I tell you?" His friends are still making gross jokes about Frank and Gerard basically pushes the younger boy back into the kitchen. "You idiot! Now my friends are going to mock me for living with a faggot!".  
"Gerard!" before Frank could say anything, Mikey gets downstairs "Have you lost your mind? Get your hands off of him!" just then Frank realizes Gerard was still holding his arms, and it was going to leave bruises for sure. The boy was too shocked to even notice it. Nobody had ever called him a faggot before. Why would Gerard say that? He just wanted to help them.  
Gerard lets go of Frank's arms and looks at Mikey. He seems... Strangely scared. Frank doesn't know very well what that look means but he can tell Gerard regrets what he said.  
"I told him to stay away from m-..."  
"I don't care about your friends! They are assholes. Can't you see it?" Mikey gets in front of Gerard and he looks very serious "Frank has nothing to do with this. He was trying to help. He is collaborating with this family, unlike you who is an useless piece of SHIT."  
"At least I don't act and look like a litle girl" Gerard says in a provocative way. Mikey seems furious.  
"Get. Out. Now." Gerard says nothing and goes back to the living room. It was quiet now. Nobody was laughing anymore. Frank was relieved but still shocked with the scene he just saw. "I'm sorry about him Frankie... Gee has changed a lot,you know. I barely recognize him now."  
"T-Thank you Mikey... But I'm the one who should be sorry. I-I swear I thought it was your mom or dad and..."  
"Frank" Mikey laughs lightly "Ignore it. Gee's friends are as smart as a door. Don't let people who are inferior offend you or tell you what you are." he rolls his eyes "YOU did nothing wrong. The problem is Gerard... He keeps trying to impress those douchebags who think they are punk rock but they still live in their mom's basement."  
"O-Oh... Okay" Frank laughs, still embarrased.  
"Come on. Let's go upstairs before the idiots come here". Mikey smiles.

~~

*Gerard's POV*

Gerard hates when Mikey scolds him in front of someone. It made him look like a little kid when HE is supposed to be in charge. He's the older brother, for christ sakes!  
Right when his friends went home -some hours later before the incident- he goes straight to his room that now he also shared with Frank. Mikey's room was too small to put two beds and Gerard didn't know what would be worse: sharing with the effeminate intruder or his cocky stupid brother. Just thinking about all this situation their mom put him into, made him wanna break something. He was very angry.

But when he gets just in front of his room he hears a lot of laughs. 'Oh great. My stupid brother and Frank are probably messing with my stuff and making fun of me' he thinks. He wants to scare and catch them in the act, so he opens the door very quickly. 

"HOLY SHIT. What the fuck is going on here?!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you liked it!


	3. Chapter 03.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello my baby, hello my honey, hello my favorite readers.  
> Yes I've taken my medicine today. 
> 
> Guys if you think I shouldn't post a new chapter so fast, let me know please. The thing is .. I wasn't kidding when I said I'm excited to post this. Also as it's a friday there's not much to do (actually there is, I am lying to myself to be happy :D) so I dedicated my time to this new chapter!
> 
> By the way... Things are going to really start now. More context. Yaay :)
> 
> WAIT THERE'S ONE MORE THING... While I write I listen my playlist and on the last part it was playing "the vitamin string quartet-let down" by Radiohead and I almost had an eargasm. It's a perfect background in my opinion, omg. Well it's just a tip if you like to read listening to music. :3
> 
> <3

"NO. No way... I can't believe this!"  
"It's just the truth."  
"But...Frankie, you're 15 years old! I can't believe you never kissed anyone." Mikey laughs and Frank just shrugs. It's been hours since they've been sitting on Gerard's bed, remembering childhood moments and also talking about their current life.  
"I... Never liked anyone that much. And nobody ever showed any interest for me either." Mikey stops laughing.  
"That is just... Wrong." The taller boy caresses Frank's cheek. During their talk he realized how lonely Frank is but the boy doesn't even show it much. He is just always being nice to everybody and trying to be helpful. Mikey admires him. "You are so pretty. I'm sure anyone would want to kiss you."  
"Uh... Mikey, w-what are you..." Frank shivers when Mikey holds his face on his cold hands. Well, surely since he arrived at their house Mikey has been acting as if they were still best friends. But he didn't think the taller boy had any other kind of thoughts about him. Let alone want to kiss him!  
"Shhh..." Mikey laughs a bit when he sees how nervous Frank is. Their faces get more and more close, finally their lips touch very superficially but enough for Frank to close his eyes and embrace the moment. It was all new for him.  
"HOLY SHIT. What the fuck is going on here?!" both boys jump off the bed when they hear the door opening so quickly. Frank just stares at the floor, embarrassed and Mikey rolls his eyes as he sees Gerard's disgusted face.  
"Fuck you, Gerard! I thought it was mom. You idiot."  
"What was that?!" Gerard keeps looking with a surprised face at both Frank and Mikey. "Really, Mikey? Right on the first day that he's here you're alredy trying to fuc-..."  
"We did nothing much." Mikey scoffs "You are imagining things." Mikey holds Frank's hand, scaring him since the boy seemed to be immersed in his own world this whole time he was staring at the floor "Let's go for a walk?"  
"Oh no, no no, NO." Gerard closes the door behind him and points at Mikey "I don't want to see you two acting like fags in our house. Michael.."  
"Gerard." he smiles sarcastically. "I'm pretty sure we've talked about this a long time ago. Huh?"  
"But...But... No... Why it has to be with this little-..."  
"Enough! Frank doesn't have to listen more of your shit." the younger brother opens the door and takes Frank with him by his arm. But instead of leaving he turns back to Gee. "By the way... I don't either! Honestly, I was alredy sick of you before, but now...! I just really hope you get ashamed of being an useless piece of shit and then get a job alredy to get the hell out of my house."

 

Frank's eyes widen when he hears the words the brothers share. They didn't even look like they were brothers. Well, as a single child he would never really know how it is but he's pretty sure it shouldn't be this way. Before being taken downstairs by Mikey, he notices Gerard's bright green eyes; They would seem beautiful, if he didn't know it was for the tears forming in the older boy's eyes. He seemed very hurt by Mikey's words. He closes the door, and then the whole house is silent again. 

 

~~

 

Frank is happy. Donna had thanked him for helping with the house work and he was really starting to be Mikey's friend again. He didn't really have any friends at school so it felt good to have someone interested in what he had to say, or laughed at his silly jokes. However, sometimes he still thought about the kiss... Did Mikey really mean it or was he just messing around? Frank didn't have the guts to ask, anyway. The taller boy didn't seem to take things very seriously. He seemed to be the kind of person who just appreciates life without worrying much. Frank admired Mikey for that.

 

"Goodnight Frankie."  
"Goodnight Mikey" Frank smiles as he watches Mikey getting into his room. He takes a deep breath before opening Gerard's door. Gladly, the older boy was alredy sleeping. He didn't even join them in dinner. He was still upset. Frank turns off the lampshade and goes to bed. 

Frank opens his eyes but he's still too sleepy to really see something. He has to blink a lot to see that is 3 am on the digital clock on Gerard's nightstand. A noise woke him up -he's sure of that. Frank always had a light sleep, if he wakes up in the middle of the night is because something is happening around. He hears it again; Seemes to be someone putting a cup on the kitchen sink. He turns on the light and sees the empty space on Gerard's bed. Nothing there but his batman sheets.  
He turns off the light and leaves the room, getting downstairs very slow to not make any noise even though he's wearing socks. When he gets into the kitchen he sighs relieved, indeed it was Gerard there, sitting and drinking his coffee. He seems so peaceful... It was probably the first time Frank has seen him like this since he arrived. He smiles and just then Gerard notices him standing there. Gee seems scared and looks away.

 

"Do you always wake up in the middle of the night?" Frank asks. His voice is raspy since he just woke up.  
"No." It's all Gerard says, with no enthusiasm. He turns all his attention back to his coffee mug. He lets clear he doesn't want to talk, but Frank is very persistent. He knew something was wrong since he had seen Gerard crying that afternoon.  
"I'm very sorry about what Mikey said to you... I didn't want to be an intruder in your fight but I think that if you want to motivate someone to do something, you don't call them an "useless piece of shit" or things like that." He laughs nervously. Gerard just answers with a "hum". He seems uninterested. "Do you want to live alone someday?"  
"Being alone all the time, getting home and not seeing anyone, having to pay endless bills all by yourself, cook, clean the house..." he looks at Frank "What do you think?" He laughs sarcastically.  
"Hey, I can teach you how to cook! I'm not a professional but I get lots of compliments." Frank smiles and gets closer to the table. Gerard seems surprised.  
"No way! Cooking is for the ladies. And faggots like you." He says irritated. He gets up and goes to the sink, putting his mug there. Frank stares at the floor. Gerard always says things that he doesn't know how to answer... And not even if he should answer.  
"Let's go back to bed?" Frank asks when Gerard turns around.  
"What? You want me to read you a fairy tale?" He rolls his eyes "I'm gonna smoke..." Frank opens his mouth but is interrupted "And don't even think about telling someone."  
"B-But... You are not underage anymore, what is the probl-"  
"Yeah, whatever. I would hear a lot of shit anyway. Everybody wants me to become an adult from one day to another, but they never treat me like one." He sighs. "To them I'm still just a rebel teenager."  
"I-I... You are an adult to me." Gerard raises one eyebrow "You just... Maybe need to walk with the right people... Then maybe Mikey and your parents would see you as an ..."  
"Oh shut up!" Gerard whispers, to not scream and wake up everybody. Frank gets back a bit as if he had just been hit by a bullet. "I am not going to change because people think I should be something. Am I an adult? Am I not? Fuck it. Overall I want to be treated properly... Like a person. Not a baby. I want them to respect me, not tell me what to do all the time. That is not being an adult." Frank nods. Gerard just sighs again. "Forget it. You are still a kid but one day you will understand. Well, maybe."  
"Now you sound like an old man." Frank whispers, smiling widely.  
"What did you say?" Gerard really didn't hear it because he had turned around to open the door to the backyard.  
"Nevermind." Frank shakes his head. The older boy just shrugs and leaves, lighting his cigarette while leaning against the wall. Frank is about to go back upstairs but gets hypnotized by Gerard; The way he holds the cigarette and how the smoke leaves his mouth like it was in slow motion. His face so peaceful and calm again, eyes barely closed; He didn't even look like the same person Frank knew. Maybe he wasn't really like that anyway. Frank thinks that the smoke is like all the bad thoughts that makes Gerard be so grumpy, and then later he would come back to normal. Frank sits on the doorframe, brings his knees close to his chest and relaxes his head on them. He watches.


	4. Chapter 04.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello guys. Get a sit. We need to talk. :I
> 
> Well the good news is... this chapter has more context. Told you we're getting there :D I wrote lots of chapters alredy, I'm feeling very creative about this. This chapter is not exactly the way I wanted but I could not spend much time re-writing it anymore because of the following reasons.
> 
> The bad news is that I got an eye infection on friday (that's the reason I didn't post earlier, I couldn't use the computer) I still can't actually but my eye is better now, not perfect yet but we'll get there. The doctor said I'll have to wash both of my eyes with baby shampoo for the rest of my life if I don't want to have big problems. OMG. Ain't nobody got time for that.  
> I just wanted to say maybe it will take more 2 or 3 days until I post a new chapter. Because of this problem I couldn't go 2 days to college and I alredy couldn't miss any days anymore otherwise they will kick me off :D or something, and I don't have anybody to give me the classes I lost so I'm in big trouble and my parents are not satisfied :D  
> SO I'm not sure when I'm going to post again but I will this week, promise. Especially since I'm loving the chapters I'm writing. I hope you like them too, of course.
> 
> Thanks for commeting and leaving kudos, that makes me soo happy yay :3 <3

*Frank’s Pov*

Frank feels a hot breath on his face so he forces himself to slowly open his eyes and then all he sees is a pair of beautiful hazel eyes.  
“Good morning, Princess!”  
“Ah!” he jumps out of the bed, now awake and sighs as he sees Mikey laughing.  
“Finally!” He says “C’mon, everybody is waiting you for breakfast.” He gets out of the room when Frank nods and still a bit sleepy the younger boy goes to the bathroom.  
Donna and Donald didn’t leave yet. They are on the table drinking coffee with Mikey when Frank gets downstairs. It is 9:50 am.  
“Good morning.” Frank says and sits down.  
“Frank! Your mom called me yesterday” Donna says, putting more coffee on her mug. Frank looks at her, surprised “She is okay but very busy with her work. She said she would call you later, as soon as she can.”  
“As soon as she can…” Frank repeats sadly.  
“Hey. Don’t be sad.” Mikey pats his back “We will have lots of fun this vacation. You’ll see.” He smiles. Frank smiles back, but inside he’s still very sad. Why did his mom call Donna first instead of him?  
“C’mon, baby. I still need that ride. I can’t be late for work.” Donald says to Donna as he gets up and looks for her car keys.  
“Okay. Geez. They are on my purse. Calm down.” Donna complains and before she leaves, she kisses Mikey and Frank’s forehead. Mikey looks very embarrassed and Frank laughs. “Take care, boys.”  
“Hey, where is Gerard? He wasn’t on his bed.” Frank asks when Mikey’s parents leave.  
“Oh, he must be on the basement. He spends a lot of time there.” Mikey says, putting his mug on the sink “Wanna see what he does there?” He smiles.  
“Uh… I don’t think we should…”  
“Ugh, you are no fun” Mikey rolls his eyes “C’mon! Let’s go before he goes back upstairs.” Mikey gets Frank by his arm and they go fast to the backyard. 

*Gerard’s Pov*

Once again Gerard is on his desk; Papers and pencils everywhere, but no inspiration to be seen. He really wants to join the contest that an art gallery from New York invited him but he simply has no ideas. They gave the artists total freedom to choose a theme and style but still it’s been two weeks and all he has is crumpled papers all over his table and half of a pencil. If he won, or at least got second on third place, maybe he would get enough reputation to win scholarships in some art school in NY. It would be a dream come true.  
He sighs with these thoughts and starts to sketch what comes to his mind.  
*Frank’s Pov*  
“Why is he drawing in the basement and not on his room or something?” Frank whispers. He and Mikey are laying down on the floor, looking through the small window of the basement. They can see the mess that is there, and Gerard looking very frustrated as he draws something.  
“He thinks that nobody knows he still loves to paint and draw. He keeps it a secret.” Mikey rolls his eyes “In the end of high school he applied to an Art School but he failed. He never tried again because he got very demotivated. Also his friends kept making jokes about him wanting to be an artist and now he never talks about it anymore.”  
“Jokes?” Frank gets intrigued. Why Gerard wants so much to be friends with people that demanded so much of him? He said himself that wasn’t being an adult.  
“Yeah, you know. For liking art. They called him a faggot and things like that.” Mikey explains “When he was in high school there were only girls in the art class, besides him. Then the jokes started.”  
“What does this have to do with anything?” Frank whispers nervously, Mikey shrugs. “God… Why he wants to be friends with people that make him stop doing what he loves?”  
“Gerard wants to impress everybody, Frank. Don’t you get it?” Mikey laughs. Frank just frowns and observes Gerard. He seems to be very focused. Considering the number of papers left on the floor, it’s very clear the boy don’t want to give up. He loves making art. Even when nobody is supporting him, he keeps trying, even with all the judgment he gets. Frank smiles.

~~

It was another happy day for Frank. His mom had called him and they talked for half an hour. She was fine and so was he. Mikey and Frank spent the night playing videogames until they felt asleep.

~~

*Gerard’s Pov*  
It’s been some time since Gerard got the letter about the contest in NY but just thinking about it still made him sweat nervously. He spends hours painting and drawing but never gets to truly perfection. And whatever he is going to present has to be a masterpiece, after all, getting recognition in the artistic scene is a big deal and could lead to lots of opportunities for him. He would be able to finally get out of his parents house, leave his past behind and be happy doing what he wants.  
He spent the night looking for other artists forums on his notebook and ended up getting mesmerized by landscapes that depict the beauty hidden in the night. He sets up the alarm on his phone to 1:30 am. He knew Mikey is a heavy sleeper so it wouldn’t be hard to get out of his room and go to the basement to get his secret sketchbook before leaving.  
When he left it was starting to rain and that got him annoyed. He had to walk since his mom kept her car keys in her purse. There were many cars around the street. Gerard hugs himself and walks quickly to find an interesting place.

*Frank’s Pov*

Frank heard noises again that night. It would be hard to sleep in that house if Gerard was always going to leave in the middle of the night. Frank wondered if he was going to smoke again. But he noticed Gerard putting on a big coat and boots, as if he was going to stay outside for long time. Frank got intrigued and decided to follow the older boy again, even knowing it was a bad idea -terrible, actually. He was sure the last thing Gerard wanted was a stupid teenager boy following him around, especially when he wanted to look so mature.  
Even with these thoughts, he wore his coat and when he got outside, Gerard was alredy in the ending of the street. Whether he should do it or not, the younger boy was curious and wanted to enjoy every possibility he was having now to put some color in his grey boring world.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry if there are any mistakes guys, I just got in the computer to post this and leave fast


	5. Chapter 05.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Finding out more about Gerard

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys... Won't talk much since I'm kinda sad now.   
> First of all, thank you a lot for you support with kudos and comments. It means a lot to me, really. Especially since this semester hasn't been the best.  
> Second, yeah I thought I would take longer to update but I found out I won't have classes tomorrow.  
> Third, I apologize again for stupid mistakes in the last chapter. I fixed it now. I'm very sorry I promise I will pay more attention, especially now since my eye is almost 100%.
> 
> I hope you like it :)

*Gerard’s Pov*

There isn’t many places you can have free access to in the middle of the night, so Gerard goes to the first place that comes through his mind: the Greenwood Garden, one of his favorite parks where he rarely used to go with Mikey when they were children. He walks till the most enlightened place he can find there, near a dark red Victorian tower. He sits down and observes the place for some time, trying to find a main point to focus on his drawing, some idea. Then suddenly he hears the sound of leafs breaking, as if someone had stepped on them. Gerard sighs.

“You can stop hiding now, Frank… You know, I saw you following me since you bumped into a trash can just outside our house.” Gerard says as he turns his face a bit to the direction of the sound he heard. He sees Frank coming out of the trees and walking towards him to sit down next to him. The younger boy’s face is red and he seems very ashamed. “Why do you follow me so much?”  
“I’m a light sleeper and you are not silent. Not at all.” Frank says in a low voice. “Why you are trying to draw landscapes when your drawings of human forms are so amazing?"  
“How do you know about my drawings?!” Gerard says nervous. He never would admit to Frank now, but he feels very happy to hear a compliment about his art after… Years. Probably the last person was an art teacher.  
“U-Uh… Mikey told me you are an artist and we watched you drawing in the basement?” Frank takes a deep breath, anticipating Gerard’s shouts “I was curious and I wanted to see it closer… Then when you went upstairs I went there to see them. Mikey gave me the key. Please don’t be ang-“  
“I told you if you touched anything that is mine...”  
“I didn’t touch anything” Frank says fast “I just… Admired. I always wanted to know how to draw but I have no talent, and you do… But you waste it.”  
“What do you mean?” Gerard looks at him, angry. Who this boy thinks he is to talk about him as if he knew everything? He doesn’t know shit.  
“W-Well... If I had your talent I would show my drawings to everyone until people gave value to them. You know, to get an opportunity to show the world what I love doing and that I’m talented. But you don’t… You hide it from everybody. It’s selfish.”  
“Listen here you little shit, you don’t know-“  
“Yeah, whatever. Go on, call me a faggot, a little shit and other things. In the end, you know it won’t change anything for both of us.” Gerard’s eye widen. He gets surprised. Even though he treats the younger boy so bad he never really complains about it or tells him to stop, or tells his parents, which is expected for a boy his age. Maybe Frank is bit more mature than he thought. He smiles a bit. “The only thing that change is your life and dreams fading away because you care more about what people think of you, and you create this fake person you pretend to be.”  
“What?!” Gerard’s smile disappear and he seems indignant “Look here Frank, don’t think that just because you are fucking my brother now, it gives you the right to go around talking about me. You are an audacious little kid. I preferred you when you were just an introverted weirdo.”  
“Yeah I still may be one… But that’s who I am.” Frank sighs “I know you are not like that, Gerard. When you are by yourself you are someone else… Calm, dedicated. Why you insist so much to keep this stupid image of the untouchable punk badboy? What you get with this?”  
“You don’t know anything, Iero.” Gerard stops for a second “People change. Not always because THEY want to, but because they are forced to. If I changed was to defend myself. When you get older you’ll understand. Now you are just a weak little boy, who has your mommy to protect you. You don’t know how it is to be beaten down and reduced to nothing… To feel the smallest person in the world.”  
Frank is impressed by the words Gerard says. But that just proves Frank’s point after all. Indeed Gerard is not just a rude boy who wants to be superior than everybody. Deep inside, he’s just a sensitive boy trying to protect himself from the world.   
“But what made you do that? What made you need so much to defend and attack everybody?” Frank and Gerard stare at each other “You don’t need to pretend to be something you aren’t to me, Gerard. I’m just a weak little boy after all, right? Why you try to defend yourself from me too? If there is someone you can open yourself to, is me.”

Gerard hesitates for some time. Frank gives him a light smile, trying to encourage the older boy. Frank hears all the time that he is a good boy, a nice person… But what is to be “good” after all? Shouldn’t it be more about being good not just for people who are nice for you too, but also to people who seem to need more help? It’s easy to just be nice for those who are to you as well, he thinks. The truth is that he is sensitive to the suffering that Gerard hides in the depths of his soul. Especially since he seems to be the first person to really care about it, considering Gerard’s situation and the things Mikey said earlier that afternoon.   
Frank was lonely before going to the Way’s house, so he kinda understands. But he never really felt the weight of it. All the love his mom and the few school ‘’friends’’ he had was enough for him. But not everybody is like that. Most of the time, the people who more need help are ignored, and he doesn’t like that. He wants to help Gerard and get his trust. In a certain way, they would be helping each other. He could get a friend. And maybe Gerard would have a better life quality and a good relationship with his family.

“Wait Frank…” Gerard says some time later. “That is not what I meant. Look…”  
“Hey! Who are you? What you’re doing here?” the boys get scared when they see two police officers coming in their direction. One of them, a fat man with a moustache was staring at them weirdly. “Why are you not at home, boys?”  
“S-Sir, we were just..” Frank gets lots in his words. He never gets in trouble, he’s the perfect boy, he doesn’t know how to lie. That’s what Gerard thinks as he rolls his eyes.  
“It’s okay, officer. This is my little brother, he was trying to run away but I found him and we were just about to go back home.” Frank is impressed how Gerard lies with such ease and naturalness. Well that wasn’t a big new for him anymore. It was getting more and more clear how Gerard pretends to be something he isn’t.  
The cop just nods but still stares. The other one, a red haired woman is eating a sandwich when her radio starts to ring. She answers, going back to their car.  
“Go home boys. Jersey is not the best place to walk in the parks in the middle of the night.” The fat officer says and follows his partner. The boys nod. Frank turns to Gerard.

“G-Gerard… I really want to know what you were about to...”  
“Let’s go, Frank! I can’t afford the police taking me to the station again.” He snorts getting Frank by his arm. The younger boy wide his eyes.  
“Again?!”

~~

*Frank's Pov*

“Frankie… Wake up, princess.” Frank opens his eyes slowly, again seeing a pair of eyes. But this time they were different. Beautiful, shiny green eyes. So deep he could drown on them. But when he blinks he notices. It is Gerard. The older boy smiles seeing Frank’s cute sleepy face. “I really need to open myself to you, Frank. You’re the only one who gets me.”  
“G-Gee… Of course, you can talk to me. Anytime you want.” Frank sits up fast, looking at Gerard who takes a deep breath.  
“Frankie… The truth is that I treat you bad because I’m a coward. I don’t have the guts to admit I want you for me.” He says at once.  
“WHAT? M-me?! But... How?” Frank is astonished. Gerard is on his bed stating he wants Frank. When before he just seemed to be hateful with him.  
Gerard rolls his eyes, laughing at Frank’s stupid face.  
“Like this, silly.” Gerard kisses Frank lightly.  
“W-Wow… Gee.” Frank smiles.  
“Frank...”  
“G-Gee...”  
“FRANK!”

Frank falls out of the bed. Gerard had hit him hard with a pillow. ‘Fuck! It was all a dream. Why did I dream about that? My god... I am actually getting crazy. I’m a pervert’ Frank thinks, worried.

“Gee! What are you doing?” Just then Frank realizes he called Gerard by the nickname he heard Donna and Mikey calling him sometimes. The nickname he called him in his dreams, when they were… Oh god, this was wrong in so many ways.  
“Get up, idiot. It’s lunch time and you’re still sleeping” Gerard rolls his eyes “Mom thinks you died. You never stayed up late before?”  
“Well... Not much.”  
“Kids...” Gerard sighs and leaves the room. Meanwhile Frank is still on the floor with a pillow on the top of his head. All he can think now is the dream. He read before that dreams express contents of our unconscious, things we don’t let ourselves do, get or even think about. But why the hell would he even want Gerard to kiss him?! It got confused enough alredy when Mikey just gave him a simple kiss and then acted like nothing happened. Certainly his return to the Way’s house is being a major upheaval in his life. From now on he would have a LOT to think about.


	6. Chapter 06.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello beautiful people who had their hearts broken by this band but still loves them and the fanfictions ♥ (?justignoremeok)
> 
> First of all THANK YOU FOR THE KUDOS AND COMMENTS! They make my day :3  
> It's been a ~long~ time but I'm back! Had a hard test today and I had to study a lot. College is nothing like American Pie, sorry if I'm ruining your dreams but anyway.
> 
> It's kinda short but very necessary  
> o/

*Gerard’s Pov*  
It is a rainy afternoon. Gerard is on the basement, still drawing. He isn’t so much worried about hiding his passion anymore, especially from Frank. In some way the older boy regrets opening himself to Frank. That showed weakness, which he could not do anymore. But that night in the Park couldn’t get out of his head... The result was just more meaningless scribbles on his sketchbook.  
Nobody had ever questioned him about his behavior, not the way Frank did. Most people would either accept or reject him right away for it. There was never a middle term, someone who made him ask himself why he was doing that. However, Gerard didn’t like to think about it. It always brings back memories of his high school years, which he wanted to erase forever from his mind.

 

[FLASHBACK]

Another terrible day at school. Again the older boys were beating Gerard up just because he goes to the art class and always walked alone with his sketchbook and earphones, drawing any time that was possible. But that day was worse than usual. One of the boys who were kicking him, Finn, found out Gerard had drawn him. Gee was too focused on his work to notice; He had a massive crush on Finn. The older boy came from behind Gerard’s chair and saw what he was doing. The resemblance was impeccable, but that was not what caught Finn’s attention.

 

“Wow Gerard. What a beautiful drawing. Can I see it closer?” Finn’s compliment sounded very legit but Gerard wasn’t that innocent. He’s been suffering bullying for years now, he knew the last thing Finn wanted was to “see” the drawing.  
“No.” Gerard closes his sketchbook and holds it close. Protecting it.  
“Let me see it, faggot.” Finn lost his friendly smile and looked at Gerard with anger. The boy got scared. The school bell rang. 

 

Gerard was the first to leave the classroom. But Finn was faster and told his friends outside to hold the boy. They tore his sketchbook, threw it at Gerard, kicked his stomach and punched his face. But not only his body was aching. His heart was being destroyed as well. Finn and him were friends once, when they were children. But then he started to walk with the older boys, and changed completely. Finn turned into someone aggressive, cold hearted and hateful.  
When Gerard got back home, some hours late because he was taken to the infirmary, he heard loud screams and laughs. He saw his little brother Mikey and his best friend Frank running around and playing together. It was touching. He had that one day... He hoped the same would not happen to the little boys. They didn’t deserve to go through the same he had to, every day. Gerard smiled weakly as he walked past the boys without even being noticed. He locked himself in his bedroom, just like every day.

 

[FLASHBACK ENDING]

 

It wasn’t unexpected that Frank’s words had touched him so much. In fact Gerard had turned into everything he used to hate. But he still doesn’t think it’s fair that a 15 year old boy gets into his life all of sudden and throws it all on his face, expecting answers. Why is he so interested in Gerard anyway? The boy frowns and spends much more time thinking than working on his art project.

~~

*Frank's Pov*

Friday night is probably the only time when the Way’s brothers don’t hate each other. There’s no fights, discussions or hateful words. It’s a night dedicated to fuck things up, but not with each other.  
Frank is sitting on Mikey’s bed watching the taller boy getting ready in front of the mirror. He is wearing his favorite Joy Division t-shirt, typical grey wooly hat and ripped jeans. Some time later Gerard appears on the door frame and Frank forgets how to breath for a second –He had never seen the older boy putting so much effort to look good. His jet black hair was purposely messy and it suited him so well, he was wearing eyeliner that gave much more contrast to his green eyes, a black jacket and a skinny jeans that Frank didn’t know how the boy could even walk on them. 

 

“Is the bride ready? Your marriage is not today you know.” Gerard says sarcastically as he gets into the room and searches for something on Mikey’s desk.  
“Ha. Ha. Funny.” Mikey says and Donna gets into the room.  
“Uh, may I know where you think you are going?” she asks. She is very well dressed as well, a blue blazer and skirt to match. Her hair is so shiny Frank almost gets blind. No wonder she works at a beauty salon.  
“A party. Duh.”  
“Not sure if you noticed but me and your dad are going out tonight.”  
“And…?”  
“Frank can’t be home alone!” Just then the brothers noticed their mom’s real intentions. Frank just looks down at his feet.  
“Oh c’mon! He’s a teenager, he can be alone for a night. He sleeps at 10 p.m. Jesus!” Gerard says irritated.  
“Nope. I promised Linda I would take good care of him. If I was supposed to leave him alone, she wouldn’t ask US to stay with him.”  
“But mom!”  
“Enough, Gerard! You either take Frank with you or you all stay at home.” Frank still doesn’t looks up. He knows very well how Gerard is looking at him right now and he doesn’t want to see that face again.  
“You are kidding, right?! Frank on the party with us? People are going to think he is a lost homeless orphan.”  
“Gerard! I’m serious. You decide.” She leaves the room. Mikey and Gerard stare at each other.  
“Ugh, ok kid. But if you are going out with us, you’ll have to get rid of that stupid sweater that looks like your granny made to you.” Gee sighs. Mikey sits next to Frank, holds his face and analyzes him for some time.  
“Yeah, well. I don’t mean to offend you Frankie… But we’ll have a lot of work to fix you.” Frank’s eyes widen.  
“What are you going to do to me?” The Brothers smiled.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah I know, this ending sounds like the beginning of really bad gay porn. But anyway hope you liked this chapter! See you soon


	7. Chapter 07.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My people, what is happenin'? Long time... no see.
> 
> Ok this is a bit 'meeh' but it's important because of things that will happen in the next chapter. hihhiih  
> As you probably noticed I really deslike rushing things.   
> But tomorrow is a holiday so I'll have time to bring new next one pretty fast I believe.
> 
> Oh and a wild new MCR member appears... can you guess who it is?

Frank barely recognizes himself in the mirror. Gerard choose his outfit: a misfits t-shirt, dark blue jacket, skinny jeans. Mikey worked on his makeup: eyeliner and red eyeshadow smeared across his waterline. The brothers didn’t wear makeup besides the eyeliner but Mikey got some red artistic pancake from Gerard’s stuff. The older boy didn’t seem to like the idea of putting on too much makeup om Frank, saying he was alredy too girlish. Mikey just rolled his eyes and kept with his work.  
It was… new. Frank had never wore tight clothes or makeup. But in some way he liked all the new experiences he was having with the Way’s brothers. He felt like he was on a teenager movie, living and enjoying being young. Sometimes he’d see how melancholic his mom was, only working and not really enjoying life. It wasn’t her fault, and he knew that. But he didn’t want to be an adult that will regret not having fun and living how he should in the appropriate age. 

 

“Wow Frank. You look hot.” Mikey says smiling “I did a great job!”  
Frank blushes and Mikey gets his phone and keys, and leaves the room. Frank looks at Gerard, waiting for something… The older boy notices and frowns.  
“What?”  
“N-Nothing. Let’s go?”

 

~~

 

Frank gets impressed with the mansion; it was like those in the old horror movies, boring and lifeless. But not this one. It’s full of lights, loud music and teenagers everywhere; talking, fighting, kissing, dancing… A place full of energy. Frank had never been invited to a party before, and he’s excited for his first time, wishing to see all the things that would happen.   
But they get inside, unlike he thought it would be, the Way’s got separated into their different groups of friends. Frank panics. He tries to reach to Mikey, since Gerard would probably fight with him for not want to be seen with Frank while his friends were around; But it was kinda dark, and full of people everywhere. It’s basically impossible to get Mikey’s attention. Sometime later, he gives up. He doesn’t want the brothers to think he’s a little kid who needs babysitting. Otherwise they would never invite him again, even if they mom forced them to in first place.

 

“Hey cutie.” Frank spent 15 minutes just leaning against the wall, drinking something he isn’t sure what is, just a cup someone gave him, until a guy comes to talk to him. He has gold blonde hair, piercing and a beard. “What is your name?”  
“F-Frank” he gets nervous. What would this stranger want with him? He seems older. Frank isn’t used to talk to people he doesn’t know. Shit, Gerard was right. He is just a kid... “And you?”  
“Bob. Are you alone here?” Frank shakes his head “Where are your friends?”  
“I got lost.” Frank can’t hold back the sad tone on his voice “It’s my first time in a party” he confesses. Bob would notice anyway. And he didn’t want to pretend to be something he isn’t.  
“Hah, really?” Frank nods “Well then, since you were honest, I won’t lie either. I came to this party looking for just one thing: a good fuck.” Frank’s eyes widen and Bob laughs “Relax. In fact I was very interested in you but you seem young and inexperienced. I was thinking maybe we could be friends?”  
“Sure.” Frank smiles nervously “I’d like that.”  
“Cool. Come with me.” Bob reaches out for Frank’s hand and smiles. 

 

~~

 

“Shit, shit, shit!” Mikey sighs. He’s getting crazy. It’s been 3 hours in the party and just after drinking a lot, vomiting a lot and passing out, he notices Frank wasn’t anywhere to be seen. He has been looking for the boy everywhere. He’s worried and hates himself for not paying attention, he knew Frank would not be able to be alone in a party, he’s too naïve. But he didn’t notice when he arrived, he’s used to just get away from Gerard. Speaking of him, he sees his brother as he gets in the kitchen. He’s making out with some girl against the fridge, holding half a bottle of vodka. Mikey goes there and pulls him.  
“What the fuck Mikey” Gerard complains and just by his voice you can say he’s really drunk. Mikey is wrecked too, but he has a better resistance to alcohol than Gerard. He older boy hated how his little brother was so much stronger and different aspects that he wasn’t.  
“Gee, Frank disappeared. C’mon, we need to look for him. I alredy looked all over the place and I can’t find him.” The pink haired girl Gerard has kissing just rolls her eyes and leaves. Gerard snorts angry.  
“So? Why do I care?” he drinks more “He’s probably giving head to some random guy.”  
“Ugh, shut up! You know Frank is not like that. But someone might abuse of his innocence.” Mikey says irritated “Let’s go! You want mom to kill us?” he gets Gerard by his arm, the boy walks unsteadily and saying random swears.

 

~~

 

The brothers looked for Frank all over downstairs and the backyard. No sign of Frank. They decide to go upstairs, that is equally full of people. But something caught their attention; In the long hall, a door is opened and there was many people looking for something inside.

 

“Gee. We should check what’s going on there.” Mikey gets more worried when they get in the room and hear moans. Frank is too innocent comparing the people his age, easily someone could take advantage of him. If something happens to the boy, Mikey would never forgive himself.

 

The room is full of people almost having sex on the floor and the only bed there was in the room. It was any parents nightmare going on there. Mikey looks to each face, which was kinda hard since basically everybody is making out, he just wants to make sure Frank isn’t one of these people. Getting his first kiss wasn’t a big deal, but Frank getting back home without his virginity would mean his mom killing him. Literally. Gerard is just worried to be able to stand up.   
He can’t find Frank there, so he goes to the balcony instead, and thank god he does that. He sees Frank and Bob sitting in the corner, talking. He sighs, relieved. He knew Bob is a big pervert, but it’s better they are talking and not crazily making out like the people in the room. 

 

“Frankie” Mikey says goes to hug Frank tightly.  
“O-oh, hey Mikey!” Frank smiles “This is my friend Bob.  
“Yeah, we know each other well.” Mikey doesn’t seem very happy, Frank notices. Mikey knew lots of stories about things Bob has done and he alredy imagines what would happen with Frank if he didn’t find him.  
“Hey Miks... Nice to see you too man.” Bob says sarcastic as he drinks his beer.  
“C’mon Frank. Let’s go home.”

 

~~

 

Bob decided to give the boys a lift back home. Gerard is too drunk to even walk straight. He’s on the back seat with Frank, while Mikey is in the front with Bob.   
Frank is worried. He didn’t imagine Gerard drinks so much. When he saw Gerard falling everywhere, and talking nonsense things it made his heart hurt. Gee is destroying himself slowly in so many ways and he doesn’t seem to notice that.   
Frank is taken out of his thoughts as Gerard falls on him and rests his head on Frank’s lap. His body turns into stone. The other boys didn’t seem to notice. 

 

“U-uh…” Gerard’s eyes are closed and he moans a bit in pain. He is sweaty and there’s a bit of vomit on his clothes. Frank doesn’t think about it though. He carefully puts his right hand on Gerard’s wet hair and caresses slowly, trying to somehow reduce the pain.  
Now that Frank’s life turned so different so fast, he’s experiencing new things and enjoying it: he’s making new friends and is happy with the way things are going. But he is worried about Gerard. Things should be better for him, too. He deserves that. He doesn’t deserve so much pain. Nobody does. Frank will always believe deep down Gee is a nice person. He just needs a chance.  
“Uh… Frankie?” Gerard murmurs sleepy. Frank is in shock. Would he be daydreaming now? Jesus, he is really getting mad! “Don’t stop. It’s good” it’s hard to understand what Gee said at first. But when Frank does… He just smiles

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry if there are mistakes. For some reason my wordpad keeps changing everything I write. Ugh


	8. Chapter 08.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Heyyyyyyyyyyy!!
> 
> Well I do feel the need to say that I'm not sure about these last chapters I've been posting and writing... Are you guys really enjoying it? I feel like I got kinda lost. Like things aren't being the way I wanted them to be before. Anyway, I re-wrote like 3 chapters because I changed my mind. I know WHERE I wanna get, but not sure HOW it would be best to get there, you know what I mean? I guess it's kinda hard to write fiction after some years xD But I'm doing my best, I swear

*Frank’s Pov*

 

Luckily Mr. and Mrs. Way weren’t home when the boys arrived. Bob gave Frank his phone number, asking him to call him later, with a wink. Frank wasn’t too sure about it considering the things Mikey told him as they were going upstairs. Both of them had to help Gerard get to bed.   
Frank is now putting the sheets on top of Gerard and taking off his shoes. Mikey had taken Gerard’s dirty clothes to the laundry. 

“Mikey?” Frank hears Gerard calling out in a low voice.  
“Uh, no. It’s me… Frank. Are you okay? You need anything?”  
“No, just… Shh… Come here.” Gerard sits up slowly “Hold my hand.”  
“U-Uh what?!”  
“Just. Do it, dammit Frank. It’s not like I’ll turn gay for your hand” Gerard rolls his eyes “I’m really feeling like shit right now but If I lay down my head hurts even more. I can’t stand still by myself.”  
“O-oh. Okay, sure then.” Frank nervously holds Gee’s hand. He gets sad… it’s so cold, like the boy was dead. Well, for sure something inside him was. “What’s the point of these parties? You get so drunk you barely enjoy it.”  
“Yeah like you are the party expert” Gee laughs sarcastically “I like drinking and talking to my friends. And I kissed like, eleven really hot girls today. I was about to fuck one ‘till Mikey came at me because of you.”  
“And none of them cared while you were falling on the floor.” Frank murmurs.   
“Like I’m not used to people not caring about me. Right.” Gerard rolls his eyes.  
“C-Can we talk about last night?”  
“What about it?” Gerard moans a bit in pain, holding the back of his head. “Fuck.”  
“You were about to tell me something, weren’t you?” Frank says. Gerard looks hesitant, and that makes the younger boy thinks he’s just going to say he doesn’t want to talk or something. He looks down at his lap.  
“Yeah. I guess.” Gerard sighs and Frank looks up again, fast. “Okay, geez. Quit looking at me with that sad puppy face. I know I was an asshole. I didn’t mean to call you a weak little boy. Well, to be honest that’s what I thought you were when you arrived. I mean, when your mom called my mom to ask you to stay here, all Donna would do is talk about how you are an amazing boy. Smart and nice, never gives any trouble. And I noticed how she was trying to affect me with all that... Shoving in my face that I’m not the son she wanted to have. That made me kinda hate you alredy. And then when you arrived Mikey treated you like you’re his best friend. YOU. He didn’t even remember anything about you besides your name, for Christ sakes.”

Frank is shocked. Well, now at least it made a bit of sense about how Gerard reacted when Frank came to their house. Somehow, he feels guilty. And apparently Gerard sees that on his face. He sighs again.

“That’s not what I meant either! Ugh. I’m not good with words. Look, I’m sorry for offending you like that ok? Even though I don’t like you, you don’t seem to be a spoiled prick like I thought you were. Blame my mom for that.” Gerard says. He gives a light laugh but Frank has no reaction.  
“Oh. Okay. I really need to sleep now, you need anything else?” Frank gets up and lets go of Gerard’s hand. His smile disappears. Did he fuck up again? But he just apologized!   
“Uh, no. Thanks.”

Frank just nods and goes to his bed, holding back his tears. He doesn’t want to cry in front of Gerard and make his image of him worse for the boy. Sometimes he hates how sensitive he is. He thought that now that Gerard was getting some sense about the situation and noticing Frank wasn’t planning to be an ass to him, he would like Frank at least a bit. ‘God… I feel so stupid. I can’t believe for a moment I thought someone so cool and talented like Gerard would want to be my friend.’ He accidently sobs, putting his hands on his mouth right after. He doesn’t want Gerard to listen. But he does.

“Frank? You alright?” Gerard gets up from his bed, going towards Frank but he falls face to the floor. “Shit. I’m drunk as fuck man.” he groans.  
“Gee! Be careful” Frank goes fast to Gerard, helping him sit back on his bed. Gerard frowns.  
“You know... It’s the second time you call me like that. It’s… Weird.” Frank just looks down, drying the tears in his eyes with the back of his hands. “W-Why are you crying?”  
“Nothing… Sorry.” Frank says and he simply doesn’t know what to do with himself. Just stands there in front of Gerard.  
“Why… Why you seem to care so much about me Frank?” Gerard asks with a serious tone, and Frank looks up curious. “When I go out, you follow me. When Mikey fought with me, you came to see if I was ok. And you are taking care of me now that I’m drunk as fuck and falling everywhere like a loser. Now you know how fucked up I am. I act like an asshole to everybody just to pretend they don’t affect me so much. I’m weak. Don’t you see I’m a fucking loser? Why you care?” Gerard’s tone gets aggressive.

Frank doesn’t know what to say.

“Say something damn it!” Gerard screams.   
“I don’t know! Leave me alone!” Frank sobs and runs to his bed, hiding himself on the sheets.  
“Frank. Get off the sheets. You look like a little kid.”  
“No. Maybe I am one. Leave me alone.”  
“Frank! Stop that shit. Didn’t you want to talk? So let’s fucking talk!” Frank is surprised how the sheets are taken out of him so fast. Gerard is using the nightstand next to Frank’s bed as a support to stay up. His legs are trembling and so is his mouth. Now that Frank is actually seeing Gerard’s face, because of the light of the lampshade, he notices how terrible the older boy looks. Eyes puffy, red and lifeless. He doesn’t even understand how Gerard was talking normally before. He looks… Dead. As Frank thinks that, Gerard falls on top of him, not standing the weight of his body anymore.   
“Gerard?!” Frank holds Gerard’s head up, scared. His eyes were slightly closed “Ugh, you are crushing me! Please wake up!” Frank gives a light slap on Gerard’s face.  
“Hm?” Gerard opens his eyes slowly and just stares at Frank. The boy is just scared and doesn’t really know what to do. He never had to deal with a drunk person before. He feels hot all over his body with the way Gerard was looking at him and how his body as pressed against Frank’s. He’s a teenager, there’s not much he could do about it -he thinks as a way of feeling less guilty for having these kind thoughts again.   
“Ger-“

Frank started to talk but Gerard silences him – with a kiss.


	9. Chapter 09.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> THINGS ARE BECOMING MORE CLEAR HUH
> 
> and frank is becoming a crazy lil shit we all know gee deserves that for a bit right.(???) just forget this i don1t even know y i'm writing this summary its not really a summary bye

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello guys! I'm very happy to see new readers around here ^_^ welcum
> 
> Well it's raining so I won't talk much, better post while I have energy
> 
> Thaaaank you a lot for the support ♥ I'm glad you're enjoying
> 
> PS I HAD TO EDIT I FORGOT TO SAY WE GOT +500 HITS OH MY GOOOOD. THANK YOU

*Gerard's Pov*

Gerard wakes up feeling destroyed. His body is aching in places he didn’t even remember that existed, his eyes are sore and his stomach is burning. Mikey isn’t much better, either. During breakfast they had to listen Donna’s lecture about how they are ruining their bodies drinking and using drugs, and that she would not accept that while they were in her house. Gerard didn’t even care about what she was saying – it was a lie anyway. She never had the guts to try to throw them out. She was just being a mom.  
But not just that was bothering him. He still can’t believe he kissed Frank. What the hell was he thinking? He would have to make sure the boy doesn’t tell anyone, ever. Nobody could find out he is gay, especially his friends, they would think he is weak and make fun of him forever. After all, the only people who knew he was gay –Finn and his friends, who gladly he lost contact with- weren’t very friendly about it so he preferred to keep that to himself. He doesn’t have a problem getting along with girls anyway. He would be able to keep that secret forever.  
After breakfast his parents left to the mall, and Frank is watching TV in the living room. Mikey is sleeping again. It’s the best time to have that conversation so nobody else would listen.

“Frank.” Gerard calls out and Frank turns his attention away from the TV. His eyes widen –he’s clearly trying to avoid Gerard today and he noticed. “Can we t-“  
Frank’s phone started to ring, he quickly answers. Gerard sighs.  
“Hey Bob! …I’m fine and you? …Oh no, it’s ok. They left and we could…” Gerard realizes what’s going on and takes Frank’s phone of his hand “Gerard! Give me my phone back! Are you crazy?”  
“Nope, you are not going out yet.” Gerard turns off the phone. Frank gasps.  
“What?!”  
“And I’m also not stupid. You’ve been avoiding me all morning. We have to talk about last night.”  
“What about it?” Frank says with disdain in his voice, sitting back on the sofa and staring at the TV.  
“Oh please. I was drunk but I was a bit conscious alredy. Oh wait... Now thinking about it I remember you were crying but you didn’t want to tell me why.” Frank sighs. “Ugh, I have zero patience to mind games Frank. You either tell me now or you have no right to keep being upset with me.”  
“I don’t?!” Frank gets up from the couch and Gerard frowns at the sudden reaction. “Since I arrived all you do is call me names, or get angry at me, or ignore everything I tell you because I’m “just a little kid”. Still, all I’ve been doing is trying to make you see how YOU are the only kid here. You are so stupid, Gerard!”  
Gerard is completely surprised and doesn’t know what to say. He doesn’t even know if he is angry or shocked.  
“How dare you say that about me? You are in my house.”  
“Oh, why didn’t you tell me before! If that’s the problem, don’t worry. I’m leaving.” Frank turns off the TV and runs upstairs. Gerard is just petrified but after some minutes he follows Frank. The boy is in their room, putting his clothes back into his bag.  
“What the hell is going on with you?” Gerard takes Frank’s arm and holds it tight. The younger boy moans in pain.  
“Stop, you are hurting me. I’m your biggest problem so I’d rather leave. Why won’t you let me?”  
“You really think you are going to say all that and just leave? We got stuff to sort out. Will you stop being a whiny kid for five minutes and talk properly?” Frank starts to cry all of sudden and Gerard lets go of his arm. Thank god his parents weren’t there and Mikey is a heavy sleeper.  
“Why you have to be like this? All I wanted was to help you.” Frank bursts out crying and Gerard doesn’t know what to do. He just stands there.  
“Help with what?” Gerard says slowly.  
“Ugh! This is all we talk about, Gerard.” Frank dries his face with the back of his hand “Can’t you see you are ruining your life being like this? You can fool others but not me. You could get a great future but you just throw it away, and you don’t give a shit about your family –people who actually love you.”  
“Who are you to tell me how to live my life Frank? I’m happy the way I am. I’m working on my future and I alredy have my parents to rush it for me, I don’t need a kid telling me about it too.”  
“You are not happy! You are always locked in your room, you cry when Mikey tells you stuff –you are not secure about yourself. You pretend to be something you aren’t for your friends. You even admitted that last night because you were drunk! And don’t even get me started about how you’ve been so homophobic with me but YOU kissed me last night. Just because we were close to each other!” 

Gerard can’t help but laugh a little, it was automatic. People don’t just kiss because their faces are close, Frank is so slow sometimes. Frank frowns at Gerard’s reaction and the boy loses his smile. Shit. He was too busy thinking about Frank telling someone, but didn’t really think WHY he kissed the young boy in first place. He doesn’t remember that much, just falling on top of Frank. Well, he did find Frank very attractive but he would never admit that to him. 

“If you tell someone about it, I will punch you right in your stupid face.” Gerard tries to be serious. Luckily Frank believes, as always.  
“Why would I tell anyone? Do you even hear the things you say?”  
“Wow, where did you get all that attitude from?”  
“I should be the one to ask that! You surely weren’t complaining when you fell on my lap and asked me to keep caressing your hair.” he scoffs. Gerard didn’t remember about it until Frank brought it up. He blushes.  
“N-No. Any drunk person can be very clingy, it has nothing to do with you.”  
“Yeah right. That would explain why you called me Frankie… No, wait… It doesn’t!”  
“Look, I’m done with your little games. I alredy said what I have to say.” Gerard is about to leave when Frank starts talking again.  
“Wait, Gerard. You don’t have to lie to me about it either… I kinda know. I mean, I know you don’t like me but I know what made you be able to do what you did.”  
“What you mean?” Gerard has no idea what the boy is talking about but gets back to the room. Frank sighs.  
“Remember some days ago when I told you that I went to the basement and saw your drawings?” Gerard nods, frowning “Well… There were five sketchbooks on the table as well, so I got the older one to take a peek, just to see how much you improved your talent over the years. I mean, I wanted to draw as good as you do, I wanted to see if maybe you were shitty like me in the beginning so I would get a little motivated…”  
Gerard’s body turned cold. He connects the dots but tries to deny it. No, it can’t be… Nobody else but Finn EVER saw that. He should’ve burn it. He’s so dumb. Shit, shit, shit.  
“And well… I saw the drawing of some guy named Finn. At first I thought it was a character you invented, but I noticed he was wearing a school uniform and there were hearts all over the drawing, and love phrases that I don’t know if are lyrics or something but anyway… Who’s him?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> After some years I'm downloading warcraft again xD xD anyone still plays it? Suddenly I wanted to go back, idk. 
> 
> have a nice day/night/whatevs


	10. Chapter 10.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello lovely readers of my life!!! 
> 
> Did you hear that Mikey Way got pregnant? OMG! In the beginning we judged m-preg fics, and well, who's laughing now?
> 
> This chap is nothing much so I'll post soon, the next one is ready anyway. But I always prefer to write some more before posting, in case I change my mind.

*Gerard’s Pov*

Gerard gulps hard. He can’t believe how far Frank goes. It’s like the boy’s only purpose is to dig in his life and throw it all on Gerard’s face, which is not comforting at all. He didn’t want to be so mean to the boy after apologizing, but he was asking for it. 

“Why you keep getting into my life so much?! Jesus! You are so much worse than both my parents. They don’t give a shit but you are all over me all the time.” Gerard says.  
“I-I alredy said a thousand times! You are ruin-“  
“Oh, enough of that bullshit Frank. There has to be a reason why you care so much –you care more than my family. Do I look like a friend of you who died or were you going to have a brother but your mom lost the baby? Why the hell is that? Mikey is way more friendly with you but you don’t act like this with him. I don’t understand.”   
“I just happen to care more about other people besides me. You should try sometimes.” That hit Gerard like a bullet. “It’s funny because apparently you only care about yourself, but in reality... You don’t. You don’t care about you. You care about judgment and being afraid of showing weakness. Well guess what? That’s what makes us human. You are hurting yourself thinking you are being protected!”  
“I have my reasons.”  
“So… do your reasons have something to do with this Finn guy?”  
“What the fuck Frank! Leave me alone. You even realize how nosy you are?”   
“You don't have to keep lying to me! I see your lies all through you. I may be young, but I’m quiet and prefer to observe people… All my life I’ve been like this. And you had to see your face when I mentioned that guy’s name. It sucks that you keep all that pain just for yourself Gerard…I could help an-”  
“Stop. Please.” Frank’s eyes widen as Gerard started to cry. “Just leave me alone Frank. All I want to do is forget all that happened and go on with my life. Why you want to torture me so much?”.  
“I-I’m sorry. Shit. I took it too far.” Gerard sits on his bed and Frank goes after him. “I’m sorry! Please! Don’t hate me more. I promise I’ll mind my own business from now on.” Frank is really taken back when he sees Gerard looking so hurt. In some way he used to think ‘well, truth hurts.’ But in reality he can’t stand to see the effect it has on Gee.  
“I was very, very hurt in the past alredy. I just want to leave it all behind –but I can’t. Every day when I wake up it comes back like a movie in my mind. I was just a fat lonely kid, minding my own business but still people decided to make my life much worse. W-Well… I was like you, I guess.”   
“I don’t know what to say.” Frank confesses after some time. Gerard looks at him.  
“Will you stop talking about it if I tell you what happened?”  
“N-No! I mean, you don’t have to. Really. I’ll leave you alone forever.”

Gerard sighs.

“No you won’t. You’re too nosy for that. But you alredy know a lot anyway, and sometime in my life I’ll end up telling this to someone. I guess I’d rather tell you than some therapist I don’t know. Let’s just get over with this. Well, it all started when one day I was in class drawing…”

 

~~

 

“I didn’t think it was that deep… I mean, Mikey said your friends used to mock you. Not bullies who would also beat you up.” Frank says and Gerard sighs.  
“Well, he was too small. He couldn’t remember exactly how it was.”  
“But maybe that’s the reason your family doesn’t support you very much. I mean, maybe they thought it was just friends joking, if they knew the truth-“  
“No, Frank!” Gerard interrupts, a bit nervous “That is NOT why I told you this, okay? Now you can stop bothering me with all that.”  
“Okay, okay, sorry” Frank says fast “So… That guy is the reason why you pretend to be straight?”  
“Well, it’s not like I would ever get anything with any guy at that time anyway. I was ugly, fat and unpopular. Nobody liked me in that way. But then when I lost weight, some very cool girls started to pay attention to me and talk to me. That made me feel… Loved. Needed, in some way. God, I sound so fucking pathetic…” Gerard sighs and puts his hands on his face. "Now I have new friends that want me around, so I'm not gonna date some guy and ruin everything I build up."  
“It’s… Understandable, I guess. But you are not pathetic. The bullies were! You were just minding your own business, doing what you liked. You didn’t bother anyone. That’s why I insist so much, I knew you weren’t like this because you’re an asshole! You don’t have to be like this, Gerard. You can be much better being yourself.” Frank says and Gerard laughs.  
“Yeah, sure. Being myself just brought me pain, Frank. Why would I ever be like that again?”  
“That was a long time ago, it’s different now…”  
“No, it’s not. I did say it when I was drunk, as you said earlier, but at this point I don’t fear to admit it anymore: I am weak as fuck. Not just as a person, but I fool myself thinking I’m an artist, which is pathetic since I can’t even think of something to show to the art gallery… I’m just going to give up. Maybe get a job at some fast food, so I can get out of my parent’s house. Get a small apartment downtown and…”  
“No! You can’t do this” Frank says. “You deserve much more! You are talented, you just have a lot going on… It’s not easy to life with the pressure of keeping all that to yourself.”  
“Well… I do feel a bit better telling all this to someone. Sometimes I feel like that didn’t really happen but I still feel the pain of it? I don’t know, it’s weird. It feels so far away but still affects me so much, Frank. I don’t know what to do. But thank you for your words. I didn’t think I’d ever hear something like that.” Gerard sighs. Frank just nods and looks down at his lap, biting his lower lip. He doesn’t really know what to do either. But he knows that art is the only thing that interests Gerard, that stops him from having a miserable life. It gives him the idea of a much better future. Maybe Gee doesn’t even realize how much he counts on that contest to go on with his life.   
“So… Would you still say you really dislike me?” Frank says after some time of silence, and wants to beat himself from how stupid he sounds. He can’t deny Gerard’s words were still on his mind… Well, that was good in some way. If he didn’t get upset, he wouldn’t get angry today and discuss with Gerard and they would never had that conversation.

Gerard gives a light laugh.

“You’ll never give up on me, will you kid?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for the kudos and comments guys ♥ ♥


	11. Chapter 11.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You know those days when happy things are happenning but also really bad things are going on, and you just don't know if you should be happy or sad :(
> 
>  
> 
> Now about this chapter: HAVEN'T FRANK EVER HEARD OF LOCKING THE GODDAMN DOOR?

*Frank’s Pov*

His relation with Gerard is getting a bit better now. Gerard still makes Frank stay in his room when his friends hang out at home and they don’t talk much since that Saturday, but Gerard doesn’t give him that deadly look anymore. Sometimes at dinner, Frank would look up at Gerard and the boy would give a small smile and look back at his plate. Frank always turn his eyes away, as fast as possible.   
Now that he knows the truth about Gerard, his dirty wet dreams are just becoming worse every day –something in his stupid brain makes he thinks that Gerard liking boys would expand the possibility of him being with Frank. Which is ridiculous since Gee made clear he’ll never want to admit he is gay, he’s traumatized. Also they couldn’t even be considerated “friends” yet let alone lovers. That still didn’t stop Frank’s brain from recreating scenes of kisses and more between them… Frank would always feel very guilty when he wakes up.   
Tonight Bob is coming over along with two other Mikey’s friends. They are just going to do a little get together since Mr. and Mrs. Way are going out again. Gerard didn’t like the idea and went out with his friends hours ago. 

“Frank!” Frank gets scared as the door opens abruptly. It’s Mikey. Frank takes off his earphones. “Ugh, I knew you were using that stupid thing again. Why did I lend it to you?”  
“S-Sorry Mikey” Frank smiles and sits up on his bed “You need anything?”   
“Yeah! The guys arrived. We’re waiting for you.”   
“Oh, okay. Let’s go.”  
When they get in the living room, Bob, a girl and another guy are sitting on the sofa, talking and drinking while watching TV. Frank feels very out of place so he waits for Mikey to say something.  
“Guys! This is Frank Iero. He’s staying with us while his mom is travelling.” Mikey says and sits with them. Frank just stands next to the stairs, blushing. “Frankie, these are my friends Alicia and Ray. They study with me and they both play in different bands. Cool, huh? Hey you should invite us sometime so Frank would see.”  
“Come here Frank! Join us” Alicia says laughing and rolling her eyes. Frank goes fast and sits between Ray and Bob. “So you go to our school? I never noticed you before.”  
“U-Uh no. I mean, I studied there with Mikey when we were kids, but just for some time. My mom didn’t like their educational system.” There’s a moment of silence then everybody laughs. Frank gets confused. Why was it funny?  
“How old are you?” Ray asks.  
“Sixteen.”  
“Well guess you are the younger here. Want a beer?” Ray offers. Frank hesitates but takes it. He’s alredy feeling out of place and everybody’s drinking. Ray laughs at the face Frank does when he takes a sip. It had a funny taste. “You’re cool, kid.”

~~

They spent about 2 hours just drinking and watching movies. It was about 8 p.m. when they decided to go out buy more beer and pizza. Frank decided to stay at home because he still had to take a shower. Bob said he didn’t want to go so he stayed too.   
After showering Frank goes to his room and gets surprised as he sees Bob sitting on his bed, looking at Frank’s notebook. 

“W-What are you doing?!” Bob looks up.  
“Hey, I didn’t know you draw.” Bob keeps looking page after page and Frank goes there and takes the notebook off his hands and throws it back on his bag where it should be, but he forgot to put on.  
“N-No, I don’t. I mean, I wanted to. But as you see, I suck. It’s fun so I keep doing it.”  
“I like them. Your little ghosts are funny. I don’t get why they show their middle finger though.” Bob laughs and so does Frank. “Sit baby. Let’s talk.” Frank sits next to Bob and the older boy just stares at him.   
“Uh…”  
“So. Is there something you’d like to tell me?” Bob smiles. Frank doesn’t get.  
“Uh, no? What you mean? We’ve been texting every day.”   
“Yeah but what about what’s up between you and Mikey’s drunk ass brother?”   
“What?!”  
“Don’t even try denying it.” Bob rolls his eyes, laughing “I saw how you two were in the back seat of my car. Too busy to notice, huh? You two looked like a damn couple man.”  
“N-No. We are… Well, he’s been a bit friendlier with me. And that day he was drunk so it doesn’t count. I was just trying to reduce the pain. I don’t like to see people getting hurt.” Frank says and looks down at his lap as Bob stares at him.  
“So you are a hundred per cent sure there’s nothing going on between you two?”   
“Of course! He’s older and h-he’s not gay. He doesn’t even like me that way. Or any other.’’  
“Hum, you didn’t deny you are too.” Bob smiles.  
“W-What you mean?’’   
“Well Frankie, I do have to say it was hard to see you at the party and not eat you up right there. You looked very good and… Different from how you are now.” Frank blushes. He doesn’t know what to say. It’s weird to have someone talking to him like this –especially a guy. “But I like it. You look cute. And I also have to say it’s much harder to control myself being just the both of us here… On your bed.”  
Just then Frank realizes where Bob is trying to get and his eyes widen.  
“Bob! I-I…”  
“Shh… I know. You are shy. But I’m experienced. Just trust me, okay?” Bob gets closer and closer as he talks, and Frank tries to think right but he just can’t anymore. He feels the hot breath on his face, and Bob’s hand on his leg, real close to his dick and he just forgets everything. He hates being a teenager. Bob doesn’t rush anything, just rubs their noses together slowly and gives light kisses on Frank’s cheek, getting close to his lips. “Hold on, baby.” Bob lets go of Frank to take off his own shirt. Frank blushes and looks away, the older boy smiles at his reaction. “You can touch me if you want. Relax.”  
“I-I don’t know…” Frank says as Bob starts pulling at his t-shirt. “Bob, we are friends, right?”  
“Of course.” Bob smiles “Friends…With benefits. It’s pretty common, you’ll get used to it.” Before Frank can say something Bob kisses him –this time a wet, longer kiss. Frank feels hot all over his body. He feels this is very wrong, after all wasn’t this part of the reason his mom sent him to the Way’s house? So he would stay in line? Seems like it’s been the opposite, and he felt a bit guilty.   
“Frank?” There’s soft knocks on the door and Frank recognizes Gerard’s voice. He gasps.  
“Y-Yes?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> <3


	12. Chapter 12.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Things are going to be kinda hard now

*Frank’s pov*

Gerard just opens the door.

“Oh god! Gross! Put your shirt on, man!” Bob just keeps smiling to Frank and puts his shirt back on. “Ugh, really Frank? You know, based on my experience I was going to knock before opening the door to MY OWN ROOM. But I didn’t think it was necessary. Turns out I was right, I’d rather stay outside until you both finish fucking on my bed or something.” Gerard rolls his eyes and goes to his desk, putting his backpack on the chair. “By the way Bob, aren’t you like, thirty?”  
“W-WHAT?!” Frank’s eyes widen and he jumps out of the bed.  
“No. I’m 23. But thanks for the compliment.” He sighs and gets up, looking at Frank “I’m gonna get something to drink downstairs and wait for the guys… So you two can talk.” Bob says the last part lower so just Frank would hear. The boy shakes his head.  
“OK BOB BYE.” Frank closes the door fast when Bob leaves, and sighs.  
“Having a hard time to lose your virginity, huh?” Gerard says while he’s on his bed taking his shoes off. Frank blushes.  
“H-How do you…”  
“Oh please. You are red like a tomato and the guy was just kissing you. Same with Mikey.”  
“…And you?” Frank says without thinking. He bits his lips. “U-Uh I mean…”  
“Uh, well you were pretty hot.” Gerard says and Frank thinks he’s literally going to explode “I-I mean, literally hot. Like, burning hot.”  
“S-So you remember how it was? Even being so drunk you couldn’t stand right?”  
“Why are we even talking about this again?” Gerard sighs and lies down on is bed, turning his face to the cellar. Frank just stays silent. Why the people he least felt some romantic interest for was so easy to deal with and just get there, and with Gerard it was so hard. He wanted to beat himself for thinking like this. Gerard is OFF LIMITS! Forever. “Were you really going to let him fuck you?”  
“What?!” Frank gasps.  
“Oh please. You seem to be pretty easy. Every time I get in my room you are kissing a new guy.”  
“W-What you have to do with this?” Frank takes the courage to say, crossing his arms. Deep inside he kinda wants Gerard to feel a little bit jealous, to feel like he cares about Frank. Which is stupid.  
“Nothing, except one time was with my little brother and the other with a pedophile. Both in MY room. Doesn’t that make me part of the crime? I mean, look at his beard. You don’t really believe he is 23, right?” Gerard laughs, still not looking at Frank. “All he does is go to parties and try to get a virgin kid to fuck and leave.”  
“T-That is my own business. I agreed to leave you alone, so should you, right?” Frank says and he feels a bit bad for it. Gerard turns his head to look at the smaller boy.  
“Yeah. You’re right, I know, I just…” he sits on his bed and sighs. “You are too young and you’re just letting any guy get his way with you. It’s wrong.”

Frank couldn’t believe what Gerard is saying. 

“Are you that worried about my virginity?” Frank laughs nervously and Gee shakes his head.  
“Of course not. Just saying…”

They are both silent for a moment. 

“You’re not jealous, are you?” Frank says after some time.  
“Hah. Really? Why would I be jealous of you, Frank? I alredy said I don’t have a single problem not being with guys.” Frank is glad Gerard understood the wrong way, because it was a stupid thing to say.  
“U-uh… Yeah, you are right Gee.” Frank turns back to his bed, looking for Mikey’s earphones.

~~

*Gerard’s Pov*

After some hours -before the incident- Gerard gave up and joined Mikey’s friends, but mostly because he wanted to eat and drink. Mikey didn’t let him get drunk though. Gerard usually would not give a shit, but he was starting to get… Afraid around Frank. The boy alredy has the power to drain things from him when he’s sober, let alone drunk. Also he didn’t want to hear his mom’s lecture so early.  
But they had fun together. It’s kinda weird for him being around people he didn’t have to think much before speaking or acting a certain way, in order to look cool and not fuck up. Actually Ray and Alicia would say lots of weird things. Bob was just quiet most of the time, and he kept looking at Gerard and Frank all the time. It just made him look weirder than he is. Gerard wanted nothing more than punch him in the face.  
It’s about 2 p.m. and while the other guys are very drunk, Gerard helps Mikey get the living room clean since their parents would come back soon. Gee is in the kitchen tossing the beer bottles away when Mikey comes in to talk to him.

“Hey Gee. Seems like you and Frank are getting along much better now.” Gerard shrugs.  
“Well, I guess. He’s ok.”  
“It was nice to see you talking to everyone and laughing. You don’t act like this when your friends are around. You barely smile.” Mikey says washing his hands after closing the trash can. Gerard sighs.  
“Please don’t start that, Mikey. I am what I am, ok?”  
“I know, but maybe you should say that to yourself until you accept it.” Gerard gives up and sits on the chair, laying his head down the table.  
“You and Frank are never going to leave me alone, are you?”  
“Well, thank him for that. He’s the one who’s been all worried about you since he arrived.” Mikey laughs, sitting in front of Gerard. “Look, Gee… Don’t you think that he…?”  
“Has a crush on me? Yep. I noticed too.’’ Mikey sighs.  
“Phew. I’m glad you do. Even Bob said that to me, and he just met Frank.”  
“It’s not like it’s hard to guess. He keeps saying I’m a bad liar but damn. I mean, the way he cares about me for no real reason is alredy kinda suspicious. But that’s not even what made me notice.” Gerard sighs “Even when I’m not saying anything anymore he just stands there looking at me. Like he just wants me to talk to him, whatever it is. He gives me a LOT of… Attention. And he follows me around all the time… And there’s something weird in his eyes when he smiles at me… Honestly, I shouldn’t have admitted to him that I’m gay.”  
“Holy shit! You did?” Mikey’s eyes widen. “Okay, now THAT is weird. You didn’t even want to tell mom or dad. And I was really starting to believe you had turned straight with all that homophobic bullshit.”  
“Well I told you about it when you told me about you too, it can’t change. It sucks but I alredy accepted it. That’s the only way you can hide it properly...”  
“Well, you shouldn’t!” Gerard rolls his eyes “Yeah, whatever Gee, I know. We’ve had this conversation a thousand times in the past years. But I just want that when you finally give up all this bullshit and have sex with a guy, you’ll remember me the whole time, ok?”  
“Ew! Fucking gross, Mikes.” Mikey laughs “That ain’t gonna happen. Yeah I feel attracted to some guys, but it’s not like I don’t have self-control.”  
“Okay, okay. That’s your choice. But what are you going to do about Frank?” Mikey asks more seriously now.  
“What you mean?! Nothing!”  
“Ugh, Gerard. You can’t leave it like this. He is probably creating hopes… Frank is a very sensitive boy. And he never really dated anyone; I took his first kiss, for Christ sakes! You are probably his first crush, he will be devastated.”  
“Huh, sure as fuck. Nothing I can do though” They just look down at the table for some time until Mikey breaks the silence again.  
“Just to be clear, there’s no way you like him at least a little bit?”  
“Mikey!” Gerard stares at his brother “He is 16. I’m not a pedo like Bob.”  
“So… The age is the problem, but you DO like him?” Mikey raises an eyebrow.  
“Ugh. What reason would I have to like him, honestly?”  
“Hey! Frank is a very nice guy. He’s sweet, funny and really cute. Did you even look at him properly?” Gerard rolls his eyes “And he’s a very good kisser… For a virgin.”  
“Well since you are capable of finding all these qualities in him, go on and enjoy them.” Mikey sighs “No, I don’t like him, and I never will. He’s just a kid. I only date girls. That’s it.”  
“U-uh excuse me.” Frank gets in the kitchen, looking down “Alicia and Ray are asking for you to drive them home, Gerard.” Gerard notices how Frank didn’t call him “Gee” like he had been doing.  
“Oh yeah, right. I told them I would. Thanks”  
“But you drank!” Mikey says.  
“That was hours ago, I’m not drunk, mom.” Gerard rolls his eyes and goes to the living room.

Mikey observes how Frank is just standing there. He gets up from the chair and gets in front of the boy, lifting his face up slowly. His eyes are red and wet.

“Aw baby… Did you hear everything?” Frank nods.  
“S-Sorry... I feel so stupid.”  
“Shh. It’s okay. Gee doesn’t have a heart, and yours is too big for this world.” Mikey sighs and hugs Frank tightly.


	13. Chapter 13.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> wow thank you for all your support guys. It means everything
> 
> I'm starting a new project.. it's a series with about 14 one-shots :D I'll post it after finishing this fic, I want to have all the work done before posting. It sounds weird now but it will make sense in the future, trust me n.n
> 
> Gee has to learn to take Frank more seriously now huh ..

Frank just couldn’t hide the pain he felt. That was another of his weaknesses: he’s just too transparent. Especially since he’s always nice and smiling to everyone, and now suddenly that is all gone- all the does is try to act like he is not there and goes back to Gerard’s room, listening to music and drawing was the only thing he did now. Mikey was not satisfied at all; everyday he would try to get Frank out of the bed, but eventually he gets tired and goes out with his friends.  
He wanted to help Frank, but also wanted to enjoy the rest of his recess. He didn’t know what to do since Gerard seemed pretty sure about not liking Frank and only dating girls. He doesn’t even know if Gerard was really a good person to match Frank. They basically were Yin and Yang. He preferred to avoid that situation by spending most of his time going out.

*Gerard’s Pov*

It’s 5 p.m, Gerard is on the living room, drawing random things just to practice, when the phone rings.  
“Hello?”  
“Hello? Is Donna there?” It’s a female voice.  
“No, she’s working. You wanna leave a message or…?”  
“Oh no it’s okay dear. I’ll call back later. Are you Gerard or Mikey?”  
“Gerard.” She laughs lightly.  
“Oh right, sorry. We never really talked, huh? It’s Linda here, Frank’s mom. Is he there sweetie?”  
“Yeah. I’ll go call him, hold o-“  
“Are you guys having fun together?” Gerard is alredy putting the phone away when she starts to talk again. He rolls his eyes, annoyed. He hates being interrupted while he’s drawing.  
“Oh yeah. Frank’s been having lots of fun with his new friends.” He says sarcastically.  
“Aw, I’m glad to hear that. You know, Frank is a very lonely quiet boy. I worry a lot. But he’s so good that he keeps being nice to everybody.” She sighs “Ugh, I miss him so much. But I think this is good. You guys surely mean a lot for him; he doesn’t have friends, just so quiet at school and never goes out like the other kids.”  
Great, not only she’s interrupting but she’s making he feel more guilty for treating the boy like shit.  
“Yeah he’s cool.”  
“So Gerard… I know as the older brother you probably don’t hang out that much with Frankie. But you seem to know about his new friends. Is there any girl involved?”  
“Hm, I really can’t say.” He thinks about telling her about Bob but something inside tells him it’s not a good idea to joke around with it. His mom probably hates gays and Frank’s alredy been pretty down. “So, I was in the middle of something…”  
“Oh sure, sorry dear. Can you call him? I’ll wait.”

Gerard puts down the phone and runs upstairs. Frank is still listening to his crappy emo music and writing down on his notebook. It’s all he does now. Gerard rolls his eyes.  
“Excuse me, batman. Will you get out of your cave and talk to your mom on the phone downstairs?” Gerard says as he takes Frank’s earphones off. The boy is scared, he didn’t notice Gee coming in.  
“Ok, thanks.” It’s all he says as he gets out of the room. He barely looks at Gerard, and the older boy frowns. 

Gerard really wants to just get out of the room and mind his own business, but he can’t –Frank’s notebook is just lying on the bed, with a pen in the middle, marking some page. The boy spends days just doing that, it can’t be nothing. It was probably personal stuff there.  
However, Frank did invade Gerard’s personal space first, so he uses that justification to just sit down on the bed and open the notebook. He sees lots of random drawings and small comics of ghosts, he just gives a quickly look but find them kinda cute. As he goes to the last pages, he sees that it turned into a diary. There are dates separating the texts; But Gerard doesn’t read it. He would feel very bad later. So he decides to just jump to the marked page, and it’s the thing Frank was writing when his mom called. 

[There’s still a part of me that needs to look the same way into your eyes…  
The world may fall apart. I hate everything that waits outside my door, but locked inside I’ll be alright. Honestly I’m convinced the best of me is the worst of me.  
Believe me I’ve tried but I just can’t seem to fight against the tide and undertow that drag me down.  
So low beneath the foam I can’t feel the sun burn my eyes.  
You’re still a part of me, the only part I enjoy, and I wish I still had a hold on you like you do, until you’re blue, around my throat.  
Things don’t feel the same like they did back then but I don’t mind…because the past don’t mean shit to me.  
So low beneath the foam I can’t feel the sun…  
I sank to the bottom of the ocean like a stone.  
Wish I were good enough.  
I wish I was good enough.  
I’ve never been good enough for your love.]

Gerard is just too shocked to even think anything besides “wow”. This kid is deeper than he thought. But that wasn’t the first time he thought that about Frank. He thinks of all the things Frank told him in their “discussions” about life, and he notices how mature the boy is. Maybe that’s why he’s lonely as Linda said. People just see him as a naive boy who smiles all the time for no reason, but don’t see how he can be a serious person too, with deep thoughts. But at the same time he is very sensitive. Maybe he’s afraid to show it and doesn’t know how to, and is scared of how differently people would see him –“Shit, he’s just like me.” Gerard thinks.  
Gerard closes the notebook and puts it on the bed again. He gets up and goes downstairs, back to his drawing; He decides that since he still doesn’t have any ideas, he should keep practicing; otherwise he would never be any better. A good artist is ALWAYS practicing.  
But as he gets in the middle of the stairs he notices Frank is still talking to his mom. He stops because Frank is crying.

“I know mom. But please, come back as soon as possible. I want to go home. I can’t stay here anymore.” He keeps drying his tears with the back of his hand “I miss you, mom. I miss feeling loved and wanted around. They don’t like me here.” Frank stays silent as his mom talks, and then he smiles. “You’re the only one who sees me that way, mom. I guess that makes me even more special, as you said.”  
Gerard slowly gets downstairs as silent as he can and tries to go to the kitchen, since Frank is on his back and he could say he used the other stairs.  
“It’s okay Gee, I heard you.” Frank says turn around to look at Gerard; the boy’s eyes widen and Frank just laughs. “Nothing, mom. Well, don’t take so long to call me again, ok? … Love you too, bye mom.”  
“U-uh… I wasn’t really listening you know, I just...” Gerard starts sitting on the table where his drawings were.  
“Yeah, right.” It’s all Frank says and he is about to go upstairs when Gerard calls him.  
“Frank, wait.” They both turn around to look at each other “Do you… Really feel like that?”  
“Well, yeah. I don’t pretend to be what I ain’t.” Frank says coldly and Gerard just turns back to his drawings.  
“Not sure about it…” he murmurs, but Frank listens. It was silent, just both of them at home.  
“Excuse me?” Gerard doesn’t say anything, just keeps drawing. Frank wants to just go back upstairs to keep writing his poetry but he just feels tired of keeping everything to himself. And he told Gerard he should not do that because it’s not good for him. So nothing felt more right than to express all the feelings he has been keeping on these very sad days. “You know, I thought we would be friends after all that. I thought that if you felt like you matter to someone, you’d be a better person. I was deadly wrong.”  
Gerard stops what he’s doing and turns back to Frank, confused.  
“What you want from me, kid? I thought you were here so your mom could work, not because you wanted to get laid with as much guys as possible.”  
“What?!”  
“You are just angry at me because I don’t correspond to your childish crush on me.” Gerard says, and Frank seems shocked “You know what? Fuck you for that, Frank. We were just fine until you turned it all into something gay.”  
“I DID?!” Frank gasps “YOU kissed me!”  
“I was drunk! Jesus.”  
“Even Bob was drunk and he literally told to my face he had other intentions with me, but he didn’t kiss me Gerard.” Frank crosses his arms.  
“Frank, in the virgin world a kiss may represent eternal love, but in normal world it’s just two mouths touching, ok? I alredy let it very clear I’m not going to ruin my life because of some guy…Again.” Gerard says, getting up from the chair and closing his sketchbook. Frank starts crying again. “Ugh, seriously now, what you want from me?”  
“I don’t know, just, let’s never talk again ok? That’s all you ever wanted anyway.” Frank says angrily. Gerard rolls his eyes.  
“Stop that bullshit, Frank! You ask me to leave you alone but YOU never leave me! You always come back, always all over my feet. Just tell me what the fuck you want!”  
“I WANT YOU TO LOVE ME TOO!” Frank screams and he puts his hands over his mouth fast when he realizes what he just said. He really needs to work on his self-control. Gerard’s eyes widen; well he noticed Frank’s signs of having a crush on him but… Love?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> lyrics: oceans - frank iero


	14. Chapter 14.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello  
> thnks for the kudos and comments and all  
> *virtual hug*

“Wait, Frank!” Gerard gets Frank by his arm as he tries to go back upstairs “You can’t just say that and leave!”  
“Let me go, Gerard. We both said all we had to. Much more, actually.” Just by his voice Gerard can feel how hurt Frank is.  
“Okay then let’s talk for real not just keep throwing these things in each other’s face forever! It always brings us back to this situation! I’m tired.” Gerard says and Frank sighs. He pushes his arm back, close to his chest.  
“I have nothing else to say. You alredy know. I like you. You don’t like me. That’s it.”   
“W-Well what do we do now? If you keep fighting with me my parents will start asking questions. You’ll go back home but I’m the one who’ll have to stand their bullshit.” Gerard crosses his arm.  
“Oh. I see. So this is about you, again.” Frank looks down at his feet and they get silence for some time.  
“It’s impossible that you love me, you know that right? You just say that because you are lonely and-“  
“Don’t. Please.”   
“Frank you’ve been here for like, almost two weeks. You don’t even know me.” Frank shakes his head.  
“I know you better than anyone else! Maybe more than yourself.” he says and Gerard laughs “Well it’s expected that you react like this. You don’t like anyone who loves you, anyway. You only care about pleasing the people who hate who you really are.” Gerard loses his smile “Oh this you won’t deny, right? I loved you even when I knew all the things that happened to you, the things you really like, the bad things you do and the things who make you who you are but still you don’t give a shit about me. Still you keep going out with your friends, that don’t even care about knowing something about you. How can they not even know you are gay? Jesus.”  
“Oh and you are so transparent about yourself that your own mom doesn’t know who you are either? Apparently it’s like that, since she asked about girls.” Gerard scoffs “It’s easy for you to say all I’m doing wrong with my life, from the outside.”  
“That’s your fault!” Frank says angrily “If you let me be part of your life- You know what, if with all the way you just turn me down and I never stop caring about you, you still doubt that what I feel for you is real then I don’t know what to do.”  
“Shut up!” Gerard suddenly bursts out and holds both of Frank’s arms strongly, the boy moans in pain “YOU CAN’T LOVE ME! You CAN’T! Shove that love deep down somewhere in you where nobody will never ever see. I won’t let you ruin my life too.” Frank starts crying.  
“You are a monster.”  
“Gerard! What the fuck is going on!” Just then both boys realize Mikey opening the front door; he’s holding fast food bags and shoves them in the sofa as he runs towards Gerard, yanking him from Frank. “Are you crazy? Mom sees Frank’s red marks on his arms and you are a dead man! What is happening here?”

Frank just puts his hands over his face, ashamed. He wishes he wasn’t such an idiot, he wishes he’d never followed Gerard that first night he woke up or ANY other night, he wishes going back in time and just being as far away as possible from the older boy. 

“You were right, Mikey. He doesn’t have a heart.” Frank says after some time, getting both of their attention. 

Gerard doesn’t say anything. 

“I’m sick of this! You two need to solve your issues before we all go fucking crazy!” Mikey says. He is very angry since he saw the scene of them fighting. Frank is a nice and sweet boy, and Gerard is bitter as hell. He couldn’t really picture them together but he knew if that happened his brother would either turn into a totally different person or break Frank’s heart even more. But they could only be together if he stopped that stupid resistance; if he just assumed who he is. This apparently isn’t going to happen so easily. "I'm so tired. I didn't want to be a part of this but if you two are too childish to discuss like adults, I will interfere!".

~~

Mikey spend the rest of the afternoon talking to both Gerard and Frank, separately. He isn’t a love expert, but he knew how to deal with his brother’s stubbornness.  
It was about 9 p.m. and Gerard had taken a shower and was going back to his room. He knows Frank is alredy on his bed, and they both HAVE to talk. Otherwise he would have not one but two teenagers wearing him out. He sighs and opens the door.  
Frank is on his bed reading, but when the door opens he puts the book on Gerard’s shelf and pretends to be sleeping.  
Gerard shakes his head and sits on Frank’s bed, by his legs. The smaller boy looks up, surprised. It was probably the first time the older boy is the one who goes talk to him first.

“H-Hey. I’m sorry I hurt you. Is it too bad?” Gerard says in a low voice, he seems to be ashamed and Frank notices. But he doesn’t think Gerard deserve his pity. He acted like an animal towards him. He didn't even want to imagine what would be of him if Mikey hadn't arrived.  
“Nothing compared to how I feel inside.” Frank says, coldly and turns his face away from Gerard’s gaze. The older boy sighs.  
“I’m sorry I freaked out. I was angry. It’s just… You really can’t love me, Frank. You just can’t.”   
“If that’s all you’re going to say, take your apologies back.” Frank spat.   
“No! After talking to Mikey I got things more clear in my mind. It was just a shock, you know? I thought you just had an innocent crush. I was never going to expect that you’d say you love me… Nobody ever did.” Frank looks back at Gee and sits up. Somehow the older boy always ends up making Frank's heart melt, making him want to just comfort and hug him. And he hates that.  
“Well, what difference does it make? You don’t seem to care about that, only the part that affects you.”  
“I know. But it’s not just that. Well, you saw today! I’m an asshole. I wasn’t born to be in a relationship and be all romantic and shit. You are the opposite of me. You are sensitive and caring, I’m nothing like that. Let alone the fact I'm older than you.” Gerard says and Frank smiles a little. It isn’t exactly what he wanted to hear from Gee, but it was nice to finally know he sees something positive in Frank.   
“I don’t see it like that. I think you are quite like me. You are just confused, and very hurt from your past. I don’t think that justifies you being an… As you said, asshole. But it explains a lot. Someone broke your heart and now you think everybody will end up doing the same. So you avoid love. In a way, you are protecting yourself. But that is not healthy, and it can change. I promise.” Frank caresses Gerard’s shoulder, lightly. The boy smiles nervously. This isnt’t how he expected to be, either. He just wanted to not feel so guilty anymore, instead of getting more affectionate with Frank. He can’t be.  
“Huh, you were right kid. You understand me better than I do. How is that even possible” Gerard sighs.  
“I-I could help you accept yourself more. If you just let me be your friend, for real this time. You can get better, Gee. I promise” Frank smiles and Gerard can’t help but smile back. 

He feels much better being "ok" with Frank than when they are fighting. At the same time that the boy messes so much with his mind, he also makes things so comfortable.   
It’s confusing as fuck and Gerard never thought he’d have to deal with all this after being a teenager.   
But he doesn’t really feel like turning Frank down after all that. Especially since he saw how devastated Frank was talking to his mom on the phone. 

“Well, sure, I guess we can be friends.” 

Frank smiles and nods, looking down at his lap. He looked over Gerard’s desk, where he had put his notebook. Gerard notices.

“Uh, Frank.” The boy looks back at him “Will you be mad if I tell you I took a peek on your notebook?”  
“W-What? Why would you do that?” The boy’s eyes widen as Gerard spoke with such naturality, as if it wasn’t a big deal.  
“Well you spent days just on the bed writing on that thing, I was curious… But don’t worry, I didn’t read your diary” Frank sighs, relieved “But I read your… poem, or something.”   
“Oh… I don’t know what to say. I don’t think I have the right to complain.” Frank blushes “Thank you for not reading my diary though. I knew you are a good person.” He smiles.  
“H-Hum, I liked it. It’s very deep… W-Where did it come from? It’s amazing.”  
“I-It means a lot coming from you.” Frank bites his lips “I just started to write down what I was feeling and thinking lately… That’s it.” Gerard sighs.  
“Frank, you deserve to be loved. I’m just not the right person to give it to you.” Gerard explains calmly.   
“Well, you’re the only person I can think that I want love from so…”

The boys get quiet. It’s a very awkward situation. How can Gerard just be friends with Frank knowing the boy has deeper feelings for him? It’s not going to be easy, not at all. He needs time to think about all that. It was so fast and sudden. He doesn't even know what he feels for Frank after all that's been happening. That’s why dealing with people and getting affectionate with them is something he’d rather avoid. Things change from one day to another and you have to keep adapting, and getting hurt in the process. He prefers to be in a comfort zone. But since Frank arrived that has been impossible.

“Sorry. I’ll stop talking about it.” Frank says after some time. “So, how’s the work for the contest going?”  
“Uh, terrible. I’m really thinking about giving up.” Gerard says. “I don’t know. I have no ideas and all my last works look like crap or too basic. I don’t stand a chance.”  
“Don’t give up yet! You have time. I’ll help you on that too, it will all be okay. You’ll see. Trust me.” Frank smiles and Gerard smiles back. There it is again, that… thing in Frank’s eyes when he smiles looking at Gee. That moment the older boy knew both of them were really fucked.


	15. Chapter 15.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hellooo everybody  
> I had no time to write lately, luckly I had this chapter almost ready to post, just had to adjust some things .  
> It's kinda short but I'll write the next ones now
> 
> thanks for the support

The last three days passed very fast and Frank is beginning to worry; He’s getting too attached to the Way’s brothers, and he’s alredy thinking about the time he will have to leave. It wasn’t that soon, but it’s been a long time since he had such cool friends like them, he was afraid of losing that. He is also glad he met Ray, Bob and Alicia but it wasn’t the same. Deep down he knows it isn’t just about friendship… It’s mostly about Gerard. It’s hard being around him and having to be careful to only show the friend side. Frank is working on that; He controls himself to not stare so much at Gerard, and stopped following him everywhere. It’s a way of losing contact piece by piece, so it wouldn’t hurt so much when he leaves.  
Not only Frank. But also Gee. The older boy is really misbelieving that he has any chance to win the contest, but for Frank he alredy won. And even if he doesn’t get invited to any college, he would still leave to New York for some time. Where he would meet other artists; they would be cool, talented, hot and funny. All the things Frank isn’t. Thinking about it makes him very sad.

“Hey, you okay buddy?” Frank gets out of his thoughts as Bob sits next to him on the sofa, opening his beer. “You seem pretty down lately. What’s up?”  
“Well, you know. The usual.” Frank says in a low voice, seeing through the window Gerard and his friends talking outside. Now Gerard doesn’t make him stay locked in the room, but makes everything he can to keep his friends away from Frank. The boy is not sure who Gee is trying to protect doing that. He prefers to not think about it.  
Bob sighs.  
“You know, someday you’ll have to get over him. You think you are the only one who got heartbroken? Love is not easy to deal with. Or find.”   
“What makes you think saying that helps? Just makes me surer I’ll never love someone like I love him.”  
“Ugh. What did you even see in him?” Bob says and takes a sip of his beer. Frank smiles a little.  
“You wouldn’t understand. It’s not like when you go to your parties looking for the hottest people to spend the night. Or anyone drunk enough to make out without much effort. I don’t know how to explain either… I never felt like this before. I just feel a strong connection with him, something that makes me want to be close. To try to make him happy and want be a part of that.”  
“Sure as hell you don’t like him because he’s a nice guy or something; must be true love, I’ll give you that. You have courage, kid. Not many people would admit their feelings knowing they would be rejected right away.” Bob laughs. Frank stares at him “What?”

~~

Donna is not happy. Her mother has a surgery to be done and she lives miles away. Her brothers and sisters just gave excuses about being busy with work, as if she wasn’t a busy woman either. She pulls the phone away, stressed. 

“What is the problem, dear?” Donald asks, sitting on the table with her, pouring sugar on his coffee.  
“I have to see my mom. She needs me.” She shakes her head “I hate so much the way I’m the only one who cares about her. And I just know that when she dies, they will all pretend to be sorry and shit. But they don’t care now.”  
“Hey, don’t be like that. She has us. We both care.” He says holding her hand, she smiles “We will go and support her.”  
“But what about the kids? I was alredy worried just about leaving them for one night. Sheyla can take care of the salon for me, but you can’t miss work.”  
“I don’t like leaving them alone either, but I see the boys are getting along with Frank now, even Gerard. I’m sure if we talk to them they will behave and take care of the house. As for my job, I can come back on Sunday and you stay there.”  
“I’m not sure about this Donald…” She sighs.  
“Trust me! I’m sure the kids will be responsible. They are more mature now. You’ll see.” He smiles.

~~

“Yeah that’s right Lynz! A three-day party in my house. Nonstop. Call as much people as possible, okay? If you guys could bring some drinks that would be awesome. I’m broke as fuck.” Gerard laughs. He is on the bed talking on the phone with some friend while Frank is on the desk, writing. It’s been some time since he’d seen Gee this excited, seems like parties are the only thing that makes him that way. Frank thinks that kinda sad, even though Gerard got into the room all happy and smiling. But a three-day party? Frank frowns when he hears that. It’s insane, and of course their parents would never agree with it. He sees Gee turns off the phone and lies back on his bed, still smiling.   
“What is going on, Gee?” Frank asks looking at him.  
“I was getting downstairs and I overheard mom and dad talking. They want to visit my grandmother so we’ll have the house all for ourselves for 3 days, then dad comes back.” Gerard says still excited. Frank doesn’t get it, but he likes to see him like this. So he smiles too.  
“Wow, great. But are you sure that’s a good idea? What if they come back earlier or something?”  
“Ugh, relax. They won’t. All I need right now is to spend days just getting drunk and high. Every day I get more stressed and I don’t want to deal with all this right now.” Gerard sighs. Frank is not sure what to say. He told Gerard he would help him, but he didn’t know how to. After all, he wasn’t a big artist himself. He would have to think about it.  
“O-Okay, if you say so. Will I have to stay locked in the room?” Frank puts on his best sad puppy face. Gerard rolls his eyes.  
“Yeah you can join the party. Just don’t do anything embarrassing like sleeping at 9 p.m.” 

~~

“…And I also expect that you clean ALL the mess you do, got it? I’m not sure when I’ll come back so you’ll have to take care of the house. Your dad will come back earlier but he will be very busy working.” The three boys nod with no interest as Donna keeps giving them all the instructions for while she’s gone. “Nobody will be allowed in this house. No friends, nothing. Got it?”  
“Yes mom, jesus. It’s not the first time we’ll be alone” Gerard rolled his eyes “And we all know Frank is the one who will do all the chores anyway. Just tell him all that shit and let me finish watching my TV show please?”   
“Gerard! Are you kidding me?” She stands in front of the TV again and Gerard sighs “You are the oldest; therefore you will be responsible for ANYTHING that happens or not in this house. You better pay attention to everything I’m telling you, got it? You are privileged! You don’t even work or study. You think taking care of your brother and the house is a big fucking deal? I’m the one who has to take care of this house, you three, a husband and a beauty salon! And now I’m getting one more responsibility. You know how that feels? If you can’t collaborate get the hell off this house, because I clearly don’t need one more problem!” 

They all just keep quiet. Donna’s face is red and Gerard just crosses his arms.

“Yeah, whatever.”

Donald gets downstairs, bringing the last bags.

“Well I think I got them all. Ready to go?” He asks, putting them by the door with the other bags.  
“Yes.” She says coldly still staring at Gerard. “I expect you all to behave and follow my instructions. When we arrive, I will call you.” They nod and she kisses each one of them in the forehead.  
“Bye kids. Don’t burn the house down… Please.” Donald waves as he opens the door to take the bags to the car. Donna helps and soon they leave.  
“Fucking finally.” Gerard says, with a smile and takes his phone to make a call. “We’re going to fucking ruin this house.”


	16. Chapter 16.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HELLO!  
> I wasn't going to update so soon but right now I'm writing chapter 26!!!!!!!!!!! I wrote 11 chapters in two days I never felt so productive before in terms of writing LUL  
> That is good because my exams start this week, but we'll still have updates since they are all ready and I just have to post them =D 
> 
> I gotta tell you that... Shit gets serious now. Lol. Even I'm shocked as hell and I'm the one who wrote it.
> 
> thanks for kudos/comments/existing
> 
> bye

*Frank’s POV*

Frank’s eyes widen as he gets back to the house and sees teenagers literally everywhere. The music is very loud, and he felt his ears would bleed from all the heavy metal playing. When Gerard asked him to go buy food for the party, there was just Ray, Bob and Alicia in the house, as expected. But he never imagined just an hour later the party would turn into such a mess.   
He gets smashed in the crowd as he tries to get inside, he can’t hear anything besides music, some guys fighting and loud laughs. When he manages to get in the kitchen he throws the bags on the counter, looking around trying to find someone familiar. That’s when he feels a hand on his shoulder.

“Hey Frankie! Looking for Gee, huh?” he turns around and it’s Alicia, with a grin on her face and a cup in her hand.   
“W-Where is everybody? I don’t know anyone here.” Frank admits, feeling ashamed. Parties really aren’t his thing.  
“Last time I saw them, they were upstairs in Mikey’s room.” Frank nods and is ready to leave but Alicia holds his arm “Oh and Frank, beware… You will probably meet Lindsay tonight. She is very… Close to Gerard. Even being his ex-girlfriend.” She smiles.  
“Uh, okay?” Frank smiles nervously, not sure what she meant by that. Is that really so explicit that he has a crush on Gerard? Geez, he’s even more ashamed.  
Frank goes upstairs, and just then he gets worried about his room. Well, Gerard’s room. What if he forgot to lock it? What if there were people there who would read his diary and see the last things he wrote about Gerard? And then everybody would laugh at him like the first day they saw him. Gee’s friends are very intimidating and heartless. Frank gasps as he sees the door crack opened, confirming his theories. He runs to their room.  
“W-What you think you are doing here?!” Frank screams as he sees a couple making out on HIS bed! The place he kissed Gerard for the first time... His face gets red in anger. “Get out! Now! You can’t be here!” He screams and the couple looks up at him, annoyed.  
“Jesus kid, go back to watching your cartoons or whatever. The hell you even doing here?” the guy says and the girl laughs. Frank gets even angrier. How dare these people get in his room and laugh at him?!  
“What’s up with all the screaming here?” they look back at the door and it’s Mikey, holding a bottle of beer. “Frankie! Finally! Gee was all angry because you were taking so long. He’s looking for you.” As he hears that Frank just forgets all about that couple, instantly.  
“Where?”  
“C’mon.” Mikey smiles, opening the door fully. As Frank leaves, Mikey looks back at the couple who had started making out again “Get the fuck out of here! Rooms are off limits for you, horny idiots.”

~~

“Frank! C’mon, sit here.” Gerard pats on the floor, where he and a bunch of his friends are sitting, in Mikey’s room. Frank really doesn’t get what’s going on. There is a heavy smoke all over the place and the smell is so terrible he just wants to get the hell out of there. That, unless Gee hadn’t called him, smiling, asking for Frank to sit next to him. Frank goes just thinking how much of a dork he is. “Guys… This is Frank. He is just sixteen. Take it easy.”

The door is closed again and it’s kinda dark now, only Mikey’s lampshade is on, and the light is weak. Frank has no idea of what’s going on, but he trusts Gerard now. Otherwise he would surely think it’s some prank to humiliate him, he knew nobody else there.

“So… I bought the stuff you asked. It’s in the kitc-“  
“You never smoked a joint before, right Frank?” Gerard says, laughing. As Frank looks in his eyes he confirms what he imagined. Gee looks just like the night they kissed, eyes puffy and red. He doesn’t seem to be very conscious of what he’s saying either, Frank thinks.  
“U-uh, no. And I don’t plan to.” Frank says lowly.  
“Oh, c’mon. At least one time in your life act less like a grandmother please?” Gee says, handing Frank his own joint. Frank thinks for a bit, and looks around seeing that nobody is really paying attention to them but mostly high as fuck in their own little worlds. He can probably just leave and it would be ok. But it’s the first time Gerard invites him to join on something, especially with his friends around. That has to mean something, right? 

Frank takes it.

“Good boy.” Gerard smiles.

~~

Frank opens his eyes as he feels a strong headache. The music that just bothered him before feels now like is hitting him in the head with a baseball bat. So much louder. All he sees first is Mikey’s room ceiling; He tries to sit up quickly but if felt like minutes to get up. 

“Hey! You woke up. Good. How is your first time feeling?” Frank frowns as he sees a weird girl all over him, smiling like the fucking Joker.   
“Who…Who are you?” he says lowly, his mouth is dry and all he wants to do now is take a cold shower and die.  
“W-Well, you don’t remember me? We just talked like, 10 minutes ago. Anyway, I’m Lynz. Gee’s friend.” She says and Frank nods. He’s not even sure why. He just stares at the girl as if she’s an alien. But then he remembers what Alicia said; this has to be Gerard’s ex-girlfriend. Shit, she is the one he talked to on the phone about the party. She is very pale and has jet black hair, wears deep red lipstick, some ruined band t-shirt and a red skirt along with black stockings and boots. “Dude. Stop staring at me. It’s creepy.” She says after some time, with a frown.  
“What is going on?” he says and his voice sounds too slow to his own ears.   
“Look, don’t panic okay? Soon you’ll be fine. Here, drink this water. You’ll feel better.” She says, giving him a small transparent bottle.  
“Thanks.” He takes it and drinks more than half the bottle at once. He doesn’t even care about the liquid falling everywhere on the floor and his own clothes. Neither does she, apparently. “Where is Gerard and Mikey?”  
He looks around and realizes there’s just the two of them in the almost dark room. But the music is too loud for him to think the party is over.  
“Hah, I expected that to be the first thing you said actually… I heard you like Gee…Very much. Am I right?” she asks smiling softly.   
“Yes, I do.” Frank says smiling back.  
“But he doesn’t like you the same way.” She says still in a soft voice.  
“Oh… Oh no! He doesn’t?”   
“No, Frankie. I’m sorry. But that doesn’t mean you should give up, you know? I can help you.”  
“You?” Frank frowns “You are his ex. Why would you want to help me?”  
“Exactly for that! Gee and I were friends before anything happened, and we still are. We’re just fine, and I want him to be happy. And you are my friend too. So it’s the perfect deal.”  
“But you said he doesn’t like me.” Frank says sadly.   
“Yes but he can learn to. There is a way to make any boy like you.” She says and gets silence for some time. “Would you trust me?”  
“S-sure.” Frank nods fast.  
“Great! Come with me.” She says getting up on her feet, offering Frank her hand. He takes it


	17. Chapter 17.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello my people. How are we today??  
> Posting this chapter really fast since it's short and all  
> Again I have two exams tomorrow
> 
> have fun reading  
> and thanks for the kudos, comments, etc. ♥♥♥♥ 
> 
> ´[[][[IWANNA WRITEEE 500 FANFICTIONS I'M TIRED OF JUST STUDYING]]

*Frank’s POV*

Frank gets a bit worried when he sees where Lynz is taking him: Donna and Donald’s bedroom. He’s pretty sure Gerard said he would lock all the bedrooms so people wouldn’t steal anything or mess the entire place. But he doesn’t say anything as she opens the door.   
It’s quite confusing, and he doesn’t know if that’s another effect of the drugs. As they get in, he feels everything spin, and his head still hurt a lot. He looks up and sees a chair in front of the king sized bed, and a line of girls in front of it. The room is also dark and only the lampshades are on. There are no boys around to be seem. At least that’s what he thinks until Lindsay takes him to the beginning of the line. 

It’s Gerard who’s sitting on the chair. Blindfolded. 

“W-what’s going on?!” he asks her quietly, not wanting to call attention as he is the only boy there besides Gerard. He watches in disgust as Gerard is just groping some girls boobs.  
“It’s just a little game. You wanna play?” Lynz answers, smiling at Frank.  
“No! This is perverted! I’m leaving.” He answers and goes to the door, but Lynz get in the front faster.   
“Nu-uh. You’ll stay. You said you would trust me.”   
“All you did was make me see him touch a girl!” he answers angrily, with tears forming on his eyes.   
“Don’t be silly, Frankie.” She rolled her eyes, laughing “It’s just a game. Look.” She turns him to look back at the chair. Now Gerard is groping another girl’s elbow “He has to guess what part of the body that is. If he doesn’t, he has to drink a cup of vodka.”  
“How the hell this stupid game will make him like me?”  
“Well, with a little… Adjustment I’m sure we’ll work this out.” She grins. “Now don’t be stupid, let’s just cut the line. And don’t say a thing, ok? You can’t talk.”  
Frank has no time to think or answer, he’s just feeling very confused. Lynz takes him by the arm and pushes the girl who would be the next in the game out of the way. They complain but get quiet as Lynz just glares at them.   
“I-I don’t think I can go on, ugh.” Gerard grunts, his head falling back in the chair. “Seriously ’m done. Get another guy to do this s-shit.”  
“Ugh, it’s the last one now! C’mon, don’t be a pussy.” Lynz teases and Gerard sighs, giving up. She looks at Frank and winks, turning him around fast. “Go on.”

Frank’s eyes widen and his face gets red and hot as he feels Gerard’s hands on his ass over his skinny jeans. He doesn’t remember being this ashamed before. All the girls are looking at the scene and holding back their laughs. He starts to breathe fast.

“So?” Lynz says after some time, impatient.   
“Hmm. Like I’d not recognize this is a tight ass.” Gerard says with a satisfied smirk and Frank knows this has to be either another of his wet dreams or a hallucination caused by the joint.  
“Yeah? Well you got it right. You can take the blindfold off now.” Gerard does it instantly because he can’t stand this game anymore, he’s alredy too drunk. And he got pretty horny, but he knows it would be easy to get any of the girls in the room now. Frank swallows hard as he turns just his head over his shoulder, to look at Gerard.  
“FRANK?!” Gerard falls back on the chair as he sees the smaller boy on his back in front of him. Lynz and all the girls start laughing loud. “What the fuck, Lindsay?!”  
“Oh c’mon. You surely seemed to enjoy. You grabbed his ass for like, two full minutes.”   
“Fuck, I hate you.” Gerard grunts, still on the floor. “’M drunk as fuck. Why you torture me?”   
“So, what are you waiting for?” Lynz says, turning back to Frank who’s just standing in the same place, speechless.  
“W-What you mean?”  
“Man, you are pretty slow for a teenager boy.” She sighs. “He’s drunk and horny enough now for you to do anything you want.” She smiles looking at Gee. He’s on his back, still on the floor, eyes closed and breathing heavily. He didn’t seem ok at all. Frank notices two empty bottles of vodka next to the bed.  
“W-What makes you think I’m gonna do anything when he’s like that?” Frank asks. Lindsay shakes her head, annoyed. Frank starts to feel not only his head but now his whole body very heavy. He falls in front of the chair, trying to hold it for support. “Ugh, what’s going on?” his eyes get heavy too and he can’t keep them open anymore.   
“Oh Frankie... You surely are an innocent boy, tsc tsc. Didn’t your mother tell you to not accept drinks from strangers?” Lynz laughs and it’s the last he can hear before passing out again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> things will get like rly fck up I believe I alredy said that but anyway.


	18. Chapter 18.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi!  
> I'm thinking about starting a new fanfic so I'll see if I finish this one until... February maybe? I'm kinda stuck in finishing one chapter... but I have much more ready, don't worry :D
> 
> This one is bigger (that's what she said)
> 
> Thanks for the kudos, comments, bookmarks, etc (?)  
> ♥  
> ♥

*Frank’s POV*

“Hey kid… Wake up, c’mon.” Frank feels his shoulder being poked and a hand messing his hair. He sits up quickly and opens his eyes instantly, scared. But he sees nothing. Only darkness.  
“What is this?!” his voice comes out raspy and low. That terrible headache hitting him again. “Oooh. Shit.”

Suddenly a small but strong light appears in front of him.

“Ugh, put that down!” he says covering his eyes fast.  
“Don’t be stupid, it’s just my phone.” He puts his hands down as he recognizes Gerard’s voice.   
“Gerard?! Where are we?”  
“Uh, inside my parents closet.” He says as if it’s oblivious.   
“What? Why?” Frank has no idea about what’s going on tonight, all he knows is he’s aching everywhere and needs his bed as soon as possible. This night seems endless.  
“THEY put us here.” Gerard says, using his phone normally as if nothing’s happening. Then it starts to ring. He sighs. “It’s her. Be quiet.”  
“Who? Gerard will you fucking expl-“   
“SHH.” Gerard puts his hand around Frank’s mouth, fast, as he answers the phone. “Hi mom! How was the trip? … Oh no! You didn’t wake me up at all. I was having some coffee and getting ready to go back to bed. I wanted to wait your call, to know if you are okay.” Again Frank gets impressed with Gerard’s capacity to lie and keep his voice straight even after drinking and smoking so much. “N-No, they are asleep… Yes, we’re fine. How’s grandma? … Oh, ok sure. We can talk about it in the morning. Bye mom, goodnight.” He turns the phone off and lets go of Frank. He sighs.   
“I feel like they are hiding something...”  
“Gerard, why the hell are we here?! Will you answer please? I’m confused as fuck!” Frank begs.  
“Thanks to you letting Lindsay bring you up to that stupid game, she locked us both here and said she would only let us go at 5 pm.”  
“What?! What time is it?”  
“4 pm. But we spent a long ass time here alredy, actually. I was too drunk and had to sleep, but you were alredy passed out.”  
“No! No, I wasn’t. She put something in my drink.” Frank said fast. He doesn’t want Gerard to think he planned any of this.  
“What you mean? You don’t even drink.”  
“No but, but…” Frank sighs, trying to remember. “She gave me a bottle and said I should drink it... She said it was water! Who the hell carries water on a party, I’m so stupid! Fuck I don’t remember much… Oh shit, you grabbed my ass!”  
“I couldn’t know it was you! It was supposed to be only girls there. You’re the one who agreed to this!” Gerard defends himself, glad that is dark enough for Frank to not see him blushing.   
“Oh my god… You called it a tight ass.”  
“Frank, will you stop! If they hear you they will fucking … Tie us up together on a bed or whatever!”  
“W-Wait… W-Why did they put US here?!” Gerard rolls his eyes.  
“What do you think, kid?”   
“Oh my god…” Frank has to control himself to not hyperventilate.   
“Man, I just hope this all stay between those girls.” Gerard sighs. “Shit. Why did I get you high?”  
“I should ask you that!”  
“I just thought it would be funny, I guess.” Gerard says and seems to look for something on the back of the closet. “Ah! There it is. I knew I put one here.” He gets a bottle with a bit more than half vodka and starts drinking.  
“Why did you keep that here? Are you seriously going to drink again after all that? My head is going to explode!”  
“I had to! I knew they would cheat to get me drunk faster and if they made me drink the three bottles at once I’d be in the fucking hospital right now.” He says. “Ah. Fucking burns but it’s so good. Want some? You need to chill.”  
“No! This is what led us to be here now!”  
“No it wasn’t. It was you.” Gerard says leaning back against the door. “Ugh, my head hurts too.”  
“What do you mean it was me?!” Frank asks indignated. He’s the victim here!  
“Somehow Lynz found out you like me and now she’s doing all this shit to throw you at me.” Gee sighs “I don’t even know why I’m still friends with her. When we broke up she called me terrible names and said I was a freak because I liked guys ‘too’.”  
“Wait, you said…”  
“Yeah, I know. I kinda hide that from everybody. We tell people the reason we broke up is because we didn’t feel the same anymore, but that’s bullshit. We never even said ‘I love you’ to each other. Gladly.” Gerard sighs “Once we went to a party together, in New York, where her dad lives. And I got so fucking drunk… I played that bottle game, you know? And I had to kiss some guy. Thing is… We kinda ended up making out for a long time on the floor. In front of everybody.”   
“Holy shit!” Frank gasps. “U-Uh I mean… Wow.”  
“Yep. That was her reaction too. Man, she freaked out that night, told me awful stuff. Ignored me for a whole week. Then after some time she came back apologizing and asking to be just friends again.”  
“T-That’s really weird.” Frank says, Gerard nods. “Can’t you just burst the door open?”  
“Nah. Let them get satisfied. Otherwise they won’t leave us alone. These guys are like this.” Gerard sighs.  
“U-Uh...”  
“Wait, is it because of me?” Gerard says, putting the light of his phone on Frank’s face to look him in the eyes.  
“Ouch! Put that away!”  
“You wanna leave ‘cause you don’t wanna be alone with me here? You think I’m gonna jump on you?”  
“I-I didn’t say that…”  
“Like that isn’t your fucking life dream, right? Psst.” Gerard laughs.  
“What?” Frank frowns angry. He didn’t even want to be in that stupid closet in first place.  
“Hey, tell me Frank… If we were going to really do something right now, what would you want first? Blowjob? Fingering?”  
“Gerard!” Frank gasps. He never heard Gerard speak so obscenely with him before.   
“What? I’m just asking. You’re gay, right?”  
“I-I…”  
“And you like me so that means you are attracted to me too.” Gerard says getting closer to Frank in the small space.  
“I’m not comfortable with this conversation Gerard.” Frank says nervously. Gerard rolls his eyes.  
“Oh c’mon. There’s just us here. Everybody is drunk outside, the music is loud… I’m the only one who will hear it.”  
“Gerard, you are drunk. You should just stop, you will regret saying all this later and you will fight with me again! I don’t want that anymore. We are FRIENDS, right? That’s what you said.”  
“I know.” Gerard sighs “But this is my party and I wanna have fun. Nobody will find out anyway, so what’s the harm?”  
“G-Gerard! W-what are you-“. Frank is interrupted as Gerard kisses him softly.   
“Don’t try to deny this is what you want.” Gerard whispers, their noses touching and Frank can feel how hot his skin is now that Gerard is with his hands under his blue sweater. Part of him is screaming to stop all this, that Gerard is drunk and doesn’t really want this. They are friends, but not with benefits as Bob said. Just friends…   
But he just ignores all that as Gerard sucks hard on his neck.   
“A-Ah…” Frank accidently gasps. He puts his hand on his mouth fast. Gerard smiles softly.  
“It’s ok. I wanna hear you.” Gerard says lowly and Frank can’t help but feel he is in another freaking wet dream. He looks down and by the phone light he sees Gerard’s hand inside his own pants. He has to control himself to not panic. This is all too surreal and fast, and he wonders if he’s still too high. “Hey, you ok?”  
“I-I’m… Not…” Frank is lost in his words. Gerard sighs and gets back to look for his bottle of vodka, handing it to Frank.  
“Here, drink this. It will help.” He smiles.

The last time Gerard said that, things didn’t end up very well for Frank. But he takes it anyway. This night couldn’t get any crazier. Or at least that’s what he thought.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guys, let me tell you something important. I'll do it in the end so it won't be a spoiler, I guess.  
> This fanfiction will not be about pedophilia. It won't be like Gerard suddenly going arrested for kissing Frank and shit. First of all, because that's not the point I'm trying to make writing it, it's not the story I'm trying to tell. Second of all, it's just fiction so anything can (or not) happen :D   
> Just letting this clear in case you think I'll be unrealistic or confusing.  
> The focus of the fanfic is not the age difference, you probably noticed I never said Mikey or Gerard's real age. Because It's not relevant to what I'm trying to get here.  
> But of course, there will be some resistence about Gerard being older. But this will not be a prison fic or something.  
> Just felt like saying this to not disappoint someone. :D
> 
> ♥♥ Hope you enjoyed ♥♥


	19. Chapter 19.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys  
> I finally noticed the rich text thing LOL I used to edit on Word but I didn't know how to do it here, so it will be better to read now!
> 
> Thanks for the kudos, comments, bookmarks etc. ♥♥♥
> 
> Oh and I decided to just post that new fic I said I wanted to, because... Idk. :3  
> It's called "Die, die My Darling" here's the link in case you want to read http://archiveofourown.org/works/8762347/chapters/20084623
> 
> About this chapter: ooops.

*Mikey’s POV*

 

“A-Ahh… Frank… Shit… Oh… Yeah, baby. Your mouth is so good.”

Mikey can’t believe what he’s hearing in his parent’s closet. When Lindsay said she locked Frank and Gerard there, he thought it was some kind of joke. But he never imagined something would really happen between them –let alone something sexual!

He stands there shocked and doesn’t know if he should knock on the door or just leave. He is confused because he knows Gerard would never do something like this with Frank, well not considering the last days and all the things Gerard said about never being with a guy again.

But then Mikey realizes that if this is really happening it’s probably because Gerard is drunk as fuck, as always in a party. And he can’t stand the idea of letting Frank lose his virginity like this. In a fucking closet! He and Gerard would just fight all over again and this time would be much more serious than just a kiss.

“Hey! Stop whatever you are doing; I’m going to open the door!” Mikey has to scream because the noise outside is too loud. He hears them moving fast inside and unlocks the door, opening it.

“Mikey! Look away!” Gerard says annoyed, pulling his pants up fast.

“Oh please Gerard! I’ve been seeing you naked for almost twenty years now. Nothing much to see anyway.” Mikey rolls his eyes, as he sees both boys fixing their clothes and hair. “Jesus, how did you let a bunch of girls lock you _two_ idiots here?”

“What? You know how they are! And I was drunk and Frank passed out. They took advantage of us.” Gerard says, getting up on his feet. “Ah. Air. How I needed that.” He breaths deeply.

“Oh yeah. Look at you two, the big fucking victims here.” Mikey sighs. He watches as Frank gets up too, hugging his own body and looking down at his feet in shame.

“Aw, my poor Frankie. Did he force himself on you? If so, just tell me. I’ll tear his face apart.” Mikey says caressing the younger boy’s hair.

“N-No Mikey…I-I liked it, actually.” He says lowly, face still red.

“O-oh! Okay. S-Sorry then… I just… Well you know… Gerard is older and I bet he’s really drunk…”

“Uh, yeah I think so too.” Frank says pointing to the floor where Gerard had passed out again.

“Ugh. Shit.” Mikey sighs.

 

~~

 

*Gerard’s POV*

 

“See, he is moving. I told you he would be fine. No need for an ambulance. Chill.”

“I can’t just not worry! He drank way too much.”

“Well that didn’t stop you two from having fun together in that closet, huh Frankie?”

“O-Oh shut up Mikey!”

“Goddammit. Can’t you two just shut up and let me sleep?” Gerard grunts, still not opening his eyes.

“No, we don’t. Now wake up, it’s 1 pm alredy.” He hears Mikey saying as he keeps poking Gerard’s side. Eventually the older boy gives up, opening his eyes and punching Mikey’s arm. “Ouch! You animal!”

“You saw that coming.” Gerard says and sits up on his bed. He has to blink fast as the lights are too bright for his eyes; there is no loud music anymore and all he sees is Mikey eating a sandwich and Frank sitting on his own bed, both staring at Gerard. “You have nothing better to do than bother me?”

“Yep I do actually, me and Ray and going to get more beer and food for the next round.” Mikey grins “You should take a shower, you smell like a corpse. Everybody is chilling on the garden, they won’t bother us now.” Gerard nods and Mikey gets up, going to the door “Oh and of course, I had to make sure you wouldn’t just jump on Frank to make out right away.” He leaves fast.

Oh shit.

“F-Frank?” Gerard looks at Frank and the boy looks away instantly.

“Uh… Hi.” He says staring at the wall.

“You sucked my dick.” Gerard says bluntly and he kinda wants to kick himself for how stupid he sounds.

“Ugh, Gee. I never felt so much like shit in my entire life” Frank says, lying back on his bed. “I feel like I got hit by a bus. Twice. And the bus was on fire.”

“D-Does anybody else kn…”

“Nope.” Gerard sighs relieved. “By the time you passed out everybody was alredy pretty out of their minds… Mikey and Bob took you to bed and you slept until now.”

“O-Okay.”

“So… That’s it? You had fun?” Frank says looking at Gerard, who got up from his bed and started looking for fresh clothes.

“Well, yeah I guess. The first day is always rough. Tonight I won’t get drunk so fast, you’ll see.”

“You know that’s not what I mean…” Frank sits up again, biting his lip. “I’m talking about _me_.”

“Y-You?!”

“If it wasn’t me… Would it be any other of those girls you touched? Was I like… Your generic fuck buddy?” Gerard frowns.

“Look, I wasn’t planning any of that. Lynz just forced me to play the stupid game. And somehow she got you there… Shit happened.” Gerard sighs.

“Y-You said it would be okay for us to… Do it because nobody would hear. You seemed to be pretty into it. You seemed… To even like me, maybe.”

“Frank, any drunk person loves whoever is willing to suck their dick.” Gerard laughs nervously. “I-I have to take a shower now. I probably look like crap.” He doesn’t wait for an answer, just leaves the room fast and goes to the bathroom, locking the door and leaning against the wall. “Oh shit…”

 

~~

 

About 5 pm everybody was going back home, getting ready for the next night of the party that would start around 11 pm. Just the closest friends stayed, and everybody is in the living room drinking some beer and watching The Exorcist. But Gerard isn’t interested in any of that. He silently goes to the backyard with his pack of cigarettes. He needed to think.

“Hey.”

He looks up and sees Lindsay, smiling. She’s holding a cup of orange juice.

“Drinking that shit makes you feel less guilty about ruining your body with all that vodka you drank?” He grins, lighting up his second cigarette.

“Letting that boy suck your dick makes you less guilty about lying that you are straight?” She sits down next to him.

“I knew you weren’t okay with that. Ugh.”

“How the fuck would I be okay with my boyfriend making out with another guy in front of everybody?” She asks softly, getting one of his cigarettes.

“And how exactly trying to make me fuck _another_ guy makes the situation any better?” He says with a sarcastic smile.

“Well, it doesn’t I guess” She shrugs. “But the truth is always better than the lie, don’t you think? I prefer when masks get taken down. Only the right people get hurt then.”

“Watcha mean?” He rolls his eyes “You and your stupid little games. We would break up one way or another anyway, I know it.”

“Well Gerard. As your friend I’m more than willing to help you taking your own mask down.”

“Huh?”

“You know Gee… after we broke up I spent days thinking about our fight. And about you of course… I realized that if you were so repressed to the point of making out with a random guy like tomorrow didn’t existed, not even caring about our relationship or anyone else… You really needed to get out of that closet. Also I couldn’t let you fool and hurt another poor girl.” She sighs. He stares at her.

“What the hell you mean Lindsay?”

“What I mean is…” She stares back at him, with a serious face now “Right now as we speak… Every single person we both know is getting an audio of you and your little boy on that closet. Haha yes, there was a hidden phone there. Recording every single moan, whisper and gasp.” She smiles softly. “Now _everybody_ will know who you really are, Gerard Way. Your little show is over.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't worry, I cut the lemon part but there will be some flashbacks in the next chapters. Not really flashbacks, well, you will understand soon. 
> 
> Did you like it? :3


	20. Chapter 20.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hmm hi  
> I'm not sure if I'm going to keep this fic as long as it was planned to be..

“Woah, slow down! Drink it slowly” Gerard laughs as he sees Frank drinking the whole bottle up, desperate. “We have time.”

“I-I know, it’s just… I want it to be good. But it won’t be if I’m myself” Frank says, and he keeps putting his fringe behind his ear, compulsively. Gerard frowns.

“Hey… Calm down. I know you didn’t do anything like this before. I’ll keep my expectations low, ok?”

“That sounds too pitiful for a moment like this” Frank laughs nervously.

“Oh shut up” Gerard smiles “I’ll guide you, okay? We’ll go slow.”

Frank nods.

“Well… You wanna touch me?” Gerard says and Frank nods again, shyly. “Okay.” Gerard pushes his pants and boxers until above his knee. He looks up and sees Frank’s eyes widen. The boy probably never saw another guy’s dick before. For some reason that excited him even more –being Frank’s first in something. He knew the boy would always remember him.

Gerard sees that Frank has no intention to do something by himself, so he starts to slowly jerk himself off. He closes his eyes and groans lowly.

“F-Frank… Please…” Gerard opens his eyes just enough to see Frank nodding again, still insecure of what to do. “Just… Do like you do to yourself.”

Frank slowly reaches out and touches Gerard’s dick as the older boy puts both of his hands on the floor now, to support his weight better. Frank does as slow as Gerard did, moving his hand up and down. He didn’t feel so pressured now, the alcohol starting to take in. He lets out a short yelp as he feels Gerard’s dick twitch in his hand. It was slightly bigger than his own, and he blushes thinking about it.

“Ah, ah, ah” Gerard keeps gasping as Frank speeds up his hand. “F-Frankie… U-Use your mouth, please?” Gerard asks and Frank doesn’t even think twice before just lowering his head and licking the tip of Gerard’s dick. Out of context he would never think of just doing it, but right now with the alcohol, the climate, and Gerard’s body all hot and pleading for Frank, there was nothing to rethink about. Everything is just right. “O-Oh, yes!”

Frank tries to suck the whole tip, and holds his own crotch as he feels his dick twitching in his jeans. It’s all been about Gerard until now, but he’s aching too much for attention. He needs relief. He keeps sucking but holds Gerard with just his right hand, as he uses his left hand to unzip his pants and free his dick from the tight underwear. He starts to jerk off in the same rhythm as he sucks Gerard off.

“A-Ahh… Frank… Shit… Oh… Yeah, baby. Your mouth is so good.”

Frank hums.

“Aah, so fucking good, ah…”

“Hey!! Stop whatever you are doing; I’m going to open the door”

 

~~

 

“Oh my god, this is a nightmare. Please, tell me I’m going to wake up and everything will be alright.” Gerard cries as he sits in the corner of his bed, hugging his own legs.

“No… Sorry Gee. She really sent it to everybody we know. But don’t worry, I canceled the party. Nobody will bother you today.” Mikey gives a sympathetic smile and rubs Gerard’s knee softly.

“My life is OVER, Mikey.” Gerard gasps “I’m so fucking stupid! How could I trust her after all the terrible things she told me!” he screams.

“Look Gee” Mikey sighs “I’m sorry but I told you it would be better to just admit who you are. This is not a thing you can keep hidden forever, Jesus! It’s a part of you. Maybe this happened for the best after all. The truth hurts.”

“Really Mikey? Really?” Gerard screams angrily “A leaked audio of Frank going down on me is the best thing in my life and I should be happy that now everybody knows I’m a faggot?”

“Look how you talk about it!” Mikey groans “There is NOTHING wrong about being gay, Gerard! You are not a faggot! You are a human being. If you don’t respect yourself, how you expect others to? You let them control you!”

“You can’t be serious!”

“Yes I can! You’re the one who put yourself in this situation. You choose the shittiest people possible to be around. Look at me. I’m assumedly gay and I have friends who treat me normally, with respect! Because they are good people. Now you just rather please a bunch of assholes, molding yourself to their liking! Now where did all that get you to, Gerard? Huh?”

“Yes, it’s my fault, everything is, now will you fucking leave me alone!” Gerard screams and throws his pillow at Mikey. The taller boy sighs and gets up from the bed, leaving the room.

Gerard is devastated. His phone keeps vibrating and the last time he checked he had 217 lost calls and 540 notifications. He just read the first ones who would call him terrible things that he feels disgusted to remember. It is high school happening all over again –the worst part of his life so far. The source of his weaknesses and worst nightmares. Everything he built up the past years to try to be accepted and happy is now melting in front of his eyes and there is nothing he can do to change it. The worst part is he’s aware that Frank and Mikey has been alerting him about it all along, but he didn’t give a shit.

He knows his parents would find out about it too, and they would kill him for doing that with Frank. The younger boy just stared at Gerard with tears in his eyes and ran to Mikey’s room when he heard the audio. He probably hates Gerard now.

Gerard dries his wet eyes, feeling them sore and he gets tired of crying so much. He gets up from his bed and drags himself to the bathroom. He washes his face and looks himself in the mirror. He would be kicked out of the house –he has no job, money or friends now. What the fuck would he do? He also hates to think about his parents reaction. They would be disgusted, they would scream at him, maybe even hit him. His mom would say how she was right all these years for thinking he is nothing but a piece of shit. She would keep saying he’s not the son she wanted to have.

Oh no, for sure he doesn’t want to go through all that. He’s tired of being put down his whole life. Gerard doesn’t think much before opening the drawer and taking one of his dad’s razors. He swallows hard as he sits by the bathtub, opening the water tap.


	21. Chapter 21.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello guys, how are you today?  
> Things are kinda tense, I'm glad I have these fanfics to distract me ;-;  
> I'm working on a new one I hadn't post yet, I want to write like 90% of it at least :3 It wont be as long as this one I feel.  
> The next post is probably going to be hmm friday/saturday on Die Die My Darling  
> And I won't take too long to post this fic again so don't worry
> 
> Thanks for reading, commenting, giving kudos and bookmarks ^o^ they make me happy
> 
> Byee ♥

Frank keeps his head down as Donald talks to the doctor. He feels Mikey’s hand caressing his shoulders. His head is aching and his eyes are wet.

“… And do you know how long it will take?”

“Well, that depends a lot. It could be about 5 hours or even two days. You have to be patient now. But don’t worry, as soon as you are able to see him we’ll tell you.”

“Well, okay. Thank you.” Donald sighs. The doctor nods and leaves. The man goes back near Mikey and Frank, who were sitting in a sofa in front of Gerard's room. “You should go home rest now, boys. I know it was a big shock for you, and we won’t be able to see him _that_ soon.”

“But he will be fine, right dad? He _will_ wake up, yeah?” Mikey asks, looking up.

“So far, yes. He’s stabilized. But I prefer to stay here, just in case he needs me.” Donald says and looks at Frank, who still kept his head down “Look, Frank… They said there’s a therapist available for you, if you want to.”

Frank shakes his head.

“Frankie… You should go! After seeing Gee like that…You got much more shocked.” Mikey sighs.

“P-Please. I wanna see him. Just for a minute. Please.” Frank begs, looking up at Donald. The man is taken back in surprise.

“S-sorry kid, we can’t for now. I promise you that right when they let us, I will call you and you’ll see him.” He tries to offer a sympathetic smile, but it doesn’t really come out that way. None of them feel like smiling right now.

“Please. Just from the door. I need to see he is ok.” Frank doesn’t wait for an answer, just get up and runs fast to Gerard’s room door. The curtains are closed and so is the door. Just as he puts his hands on the knob he feels a pair of strong arms holding him back “Please! I need to!” He cries out.

“Frankie, don’t make this harder, please. Let’s go home” Mikey asks desperate as he sees his Dad holding Frank back. All the people in the waiting room and the nurses are staring at them now. He is afraid they would give Frank some drug and keep him away like in the movies.

Frank tries to move but he gives up as he realizes Donald is much stronger. Mikey hugs him when he gets calmer.

 

**~~**

 

Donald payed a cab to take the boys back home. It’s been a very rough weekend for him. He was in the hospital with Donna and her mom just when Mikey called desperate, crying and screaming that Gerard was dying. The man just told Donna he had to go back and had no time to explain. He had to take a flight to get back home as soon as possible. He was shocked when the doctors said Gerard had deep cuts all over his arms and legs. He never imagined one of his sons would try to kill themselves. He did the best he could to be a good parent and still he was failing. After the divorce some years ago, he felt much more distant from the boys.

Mikey explained to him what could be the reason for Gerard’s outburst, but he didn’t say Frank was the boy who was in the closet with Gerard. It would only make things worse now.

When they get home, Frank just goes to his bed. He doesn’t really want to sleep but his whole body feels too heavy. He’s the one who found Gerard on the bloody bathtub first. All the screams of pain, the cuts all over Gee’s pale skin… That won’t leave his mind. He’s surprised that Gerard is still alive.

He feels like total shit. He promised Gerard that he would help him. Make him feel better, make him accept himself more. He ruined everything instead, just to have a few minutes of pleasure. He knew he shouldn’t have let himself fall for Gerard’s words. The older boy was drunk, even if he didn’t deny he wanted to do that with Frank when he got sober. It just hurts to know it could be anyone else there and Gerard would be satisfied as well. But Frank isn’t ‘anyone else’. He knew Gerard’s deepest secrets and fears and still he didn’t stop himself. _He’s_ the cause of all this.

“Hey. I made some tea for you.” Frank looks up and sees Mikey sitting by him on the bed, putting the tea-cup on the nightstand. “Just wait some minutes. It’s too hot now. Almost as hot as me.” Mikey tries to make climate less heavy.

“Mikey… Do you hate me?” Frank asks in a low voice.

“What? Why would I hate you, Frankie?” Mikey frowns.

“It’s my fault Gerard got exposed and tried to kill himself. If I had stopped him… If nobody knew that I like him none of this would have happened!” Mikey sighs.

“Look, Frankie, one way or another this would happen. I mean, people finding out about Gerard. If it wasn’t you, it would be any other guy. And I’m glad it was you, since you care about him. I see how hurt you are, how much you love him… I wish he could see and appreciate that as much as I do.” Mikey says “It’s better than a random guy that would fuck and leave him alone to deal with all this. And I’m sure you weren’t on his mind when he cut himself. Gee had a lot else going on, apparently.”

“B-But… What will happen when your parents find out it was me?” Frank says “I… I don’t wanna sound selfish, but I’m worried Mikey. I don’t wanna be taken away from him now.”

“Well, I know. It’s another problem” Mikey sighs “Your mom is probably going to freak out. She doesn’t know you are gay, does she?”

“W-Well, I never talked to her about it. But I’m sure she would accept me the way I am. She is a very nice person… Oh god… I miss her so much” Frank cries out “I sound like a baby… But I just really need to hug her.”

“Aw… I know, it’s okay.” Mikey smiles softly caressing Frank’s arm “Do you want to call her?”

“N-No! I can’t… She knows me too well… She will know that something is wrong right away.” Frank sighs.

“Yeah, you are right.” Mikey says. Frank yawns. “Now drink your tea and rest, okay?”

“Fine. But you will wake up me if your dad calls, right?” Frank sits up and takes a sip of the tea.

“Sure, Frankie. Soon he will, I know it.”

**~~**

 

“Hah, yeah I know. Everybody is saying that too. But c’mon, it was pretty obvious.” They both laugh “And who knew that little boy pretending to be a saint would _go down_ so fast too huh? Literally.”

There’s hard knocks on the door.

“Lindsay! Some of your drunk-ass friends are downstairs. If you keep bringing these delinquents into my house I swear to god I will…” The girl rolls her eyes as she hears her mom screaming.

“I gotta go now. Talk to you later, bye.” She turns off the phone and sighs, going downstairs to open the door. “Can I help you?” It was a bearded guy, he seemed strangely familiar, but she knows a lot of people anyway. Next to him there is another boy and a girl, both all dressed in black, carrying scary grins on their faces, but she doesn’t recognize them.

“Hello, Lindsay. We got a little present here for you from my friend Frank.” He smirks.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't kill me please! Happy things are coming, I promise. Poor Frank and Gee alredy suffered so much ;-; 
> 
> See you on the next update :3


	22. Chapter 22.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi if there's mistakes i'll edit tomorrow i dont have time now  
> just posting cause it's been a long time
> 
> enjoy

Frank had been sleeping for a day and half of the afternoon, when he felt someone poking his side softly.

“Hey, Frankie. Wake up…” He opens his eyes at once, seeing Mikey. “Guess who woke up?”

“Me?”

“Yeah and apparently your brain didn’t yet” Mikey rolls his eyes “Dad just called! We can go see Gerard now.”

Frank’s eyes widen and he jumps out of the bed, running downstairs. Mikey runs after him.

“Frankie wait!” The older boy grabs Frank by his arms before he can open the front door.

“Mikey! Let me go, I need to see him now!”

“Yes and you need to wear pants to get in the hospital, dummy!”

 

**~~**

 

Donald is by Gerard’s room door, drinking a cup of coffee when the boys arrive.

“Hey dad. Can we see him now?” Mikey asks; he is holding Frank’s hand just to control the boy and not let him get kicked out of the hospital from jumping on Gerard or something, like last time.

“Yes but only one at once, hospital rules.” He says. He has really dark circles under his eyes, and his voice sounds wrecked. He probably didn’t sleep at all since they left.

“I’m sorry Frankie, I know you are crazy to see him but…” Mikey says biting his lower lip.

“N-No, I get it Mikey. He’s your brother, you must see him first.” Frank says. “I get it. Really! Go on.”

“Thank you for understanding, Frankie. I knew you would.” Mikey smiles and hugs the boy fast. He is about to get in the room when Donald speaks again.

“Oh, and be careful. He’s very sensible, still can’t move his arms. He’s also not talking much, but the doctor said that’s expected. He’s as shocked as all of us.” Mikey nods and gets in the room. “So… Frank… Did you talk to your mom?”

“O-oh, not yet but…” Frank is cut off by his phone ringing. He takes it fast from his pocket, looking around and seeing that it called basically everyone’s attention. “Uh.”

“It’s ok, just go answer it outside. It’s probably her.” Donald says and Frank nods, running out of the hospital.

It’s Bob.

“Hello?”

“Hi Frankie. Mikey told me about what happened to Gerard. I’m very sorry. Any news?”

“Yes! He woke up. Mikey is seeing him now and I’ll go next. Will you guys come by too?”

“Nah, not now. He should see you all first. But I think his friend Lindsay will pay a visit to him since she’ll be around as well.” Bob laughs.

“W-What? No! I won’t let her see him! She, she is a…”

“Yeah, I know. I passed by her house today and gave her a lesson she won’t forget. She will spend the rest of recess eating just soup and drinking orange juice.” Frank’s eyes widen.

“Oh god! What did you do to her, Bob?”

“Well, let’s just say she got what she deserved. Now I have to go... I’m going to my aunt’s house for some days, in Tennessee.”

“Holy shit, that’s crazy!”

“Yeah I know. But don’t worry, it’s just until things get a little calmer. Her mom saw me, my friends and shit. But I’ll be back soon, promise. You won’t get rid of me that easy.” Frank laughs weakly.

“Damn Bob. You really are as crazy as Mikey told me you are…”

“Hey! I just don’t like seeing my friends get hurt. Well, I’ll let you go now. Talk to you later. Take care, kid.”

“You too, Bob. Oh and… Thanks. It’s good to know she got hurt too. Oh god, I sound terrible…”

“You sound like you’ve been spending a lot of time with me.” Bob laughs “Later.”

 

**~~**

 

Frank got back to the waiting room and sat on the sofa with Donald. Mikey spent about one hour and half there. He didn’t get bothered though. He knew Mikey got even more hurt than him, seeing his own brother like that. Still Mikey doesn’t let himself be taken down by that and keeps supporting and taking care of Frank. He wonders if the older boy realizes how strong he is.

Eventually Donald gets a call from Donna and has to leave to hospital for a while. A few minutes later Mikey leaves Gee’s room. His eyes were red, he probably has been crying.

“Hey, you okay?” Frank says, getting up and hugging Mikey tightly.

“Yes, now I am.” He smiles softly “Look Frankie… I’ll be honest. He didn’t want to see you. But we talked and I convinced him to. He’s very ashamed and… Well. I know you won’t hurt him. Go on.”

“O-Okay. Thanks Mikey. You are the best friend I could ask for.” Frank said smiling.

“Aw, just go on alredy. I cried too much today.” Mikey laughs and Frank nods, getting to Gerard’s room door. He takes a deep breath before opening the door. He preferred to not think about what he would say; otherwise he would get more nervous.

“E-Excuse me?” He says timidly. He closes the door behind him and looks around. The room is big, all white and Gerard’s bed is right by the window. The baby blue curtains are closed because the sun is too strong outside; even being about 3 pm. Gerard doesn’t even move his head to the side, just keeps looking forward to the wall. That makes Frank hesitates, but he trusts in what Mikey said. He walks until Gerard’s bed. He sees the boy’s arms wrapped around in gauze. The blanket is covering his legs. It’s hard to not remember when he found Gerard in the bathroom. He fights against those thoughts as he speaks “H-Hi.”

“Hey Frankie.” Gerard says and his voice sounds a bit husky. He carefully turns his head to the left, to look at Frank. He looks more pale than usual, and his eyes are red and wet just like Mikey’s were. “How are you?”

Frank laughs softly, wanting to tell Gerard that _he’s_ the one who should ask that. But then he understood what the older boy was talking about.

“B-Better. Well, much better seeing you here now.” He sighs “You okay?”

“Yeah” Gee smiles weakly “I just… Everything hurts a lot. Not as much as before now, since they filled me with drugs. But it still hurts when I move my arms so I can’t really move them. I also feel very tired. The doctor said it’s because I lost a lot of blood but they will make me better.” Frank nods frantically. “I’m so sorry Frank… I’m such a selfish piece of shit… Wanting to die and leave you alone to deal with all that shit. It’s totally unfair. I hope you can forgive me someday.” Frank is surprised by Gerard’s words.

“W-Well, I just… Please promise you’ll never do that again? Or if you think about it you’ll talk to me? Please?” Frank asks and Gerard nods.

“My dad doesn’t know it was you, does he? He didn’t say anything about you.”

“No. And I think your mom doesn’t even know about what happened to you yet, but she just called your dad so...”

“Oh… Yeah… I’ll have to deal with her. Ugh. I change my mind about not dying.” Gerard sighs dramatically.

“Oh god! Don’t joke about that!” Frank gasps and Gerard laughs at his reaction. “Well, we are in this together now I guess. We both will have problems with our moms.”

“Yeah.” Gerard sighs. “You know I lied, right?”

“W-What you mean?!” Frank’s eyes widen.

“When I said it could be anyone there with me, doing… you know.” Gerard says embarrassed “I wanted to because I was into you at the moment. As you said.”

“O-Oh.” It’s all Frank feels able to say. Did Gerard just admit he likes him _somehow_?

“All this time you kept advising me about how I was ruining everything… And I didn’t hear you, Frank. I could have avoided all of this” Gerard swallows “I deserve what is happening, that’s what I get for being an asshole to you. It’s my karma.”

“No! Don’t think like that, please. I never meant to make you feel guilty. W-Well, maybe one or two times but…” Gerard laughs softly.

“I know. But I should have listened to you. You were right all along. I know it doesn’t change anything now, since we’re alredy fucked up but… Thank you, Frank. Thank you for not giving up on me. For always trying to save me. Who knew you would end up _literally_ doing that, huh?” Frank feels tears forming in his eyes. He sobs lowly. “Hey. C’mon. Hold my hand.” Gerard offers a small smile and Frank takes his hand. It was a bit warm. “Last time I said that we ended up kissing. But well.”

“You never stop, do you?” Frank laughs drying some tears that dropped.

“Nope.” Gerard smiles. “Frank… Geez I never thought I would say that to anyone… And I wonder if it’s too late now. I hope it still can have some effect.” Gerard sighs and Frank frowns at him, confused. “Well…I think I… I think I love you too, Frank.”


	23. Chapter 23.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank god i wrote these chapters weeks ago cuz i'm sad af
> 
> how do u write a love story when LOVE DOESN'T EXIST I WANT TO MURDER SOMEONE... especifically

“I feel so guilty… Everything that is happening right now is because I’m a stubborn little shit.” Gerard sighs.

“Well, that last part I won’t deny.” Mikey laughs and Gerard frowns.

“Hey!”

“But seriously now Gee… Just give Frank a chance to talk and let him see you, please. Nobody thinks it’s your fault that happened. It just… Happened. You are just two people who had some little fun time together, so what? People have to learn to fucking deal with it” Mikey rolls his eyes “Frank is still very shocked and devastated. All he wants is to be assured that you are okay. He _needs_ that.”

“Ugh. I guess sometime I’ll have to face him. It’s just so hard… I treated him like shit Mikey. God… I feel like a monster.”

“You aren’t.” Mikey caresses his brother’s shoulder “You were just pressuring yourself too much all this time. But it’s over now. There’s no need to act like something you aren’t. You can be yourself, which I'm sure is much better.”

“I guess.” Gerard sighs. “Mikey… D-Do you really think that there’s _any_ chance that someone like Frank would ever be with someone like _me_?”

“Oh my god. Are you serious?” Mikey gasps. “Well, to be honest, when I saw you two fighting all the time, and how you treated him, I thought there was no fucking way that would _ever_ happen. But you two seemed to get each other pretty well in that closet, so…”

“Mikey!”

“Sorry, sorry. Seriously now… Well Gee, you dated Lindsay who was basically your female version. You liked the same things, acted the same way… And it didn’t work out at all.” Gerard hums in agreement “I think that loving and being with someone is much more than just matching in personality traits. Even after all ups and downs you and Frank always end up being fine with each other. You understand each other, in some way. That has to mean something, right? Isn’t there a saying that goes like… The opposites attract?”

“I guess. But it doesn’t matter now, it’s too late. I put him down too much; I was an asshole and told him terrible things.” Gerard sighs.

“W-wait so you really like Frank?” Mikey’s eyes widen. “Oh my god... Are you sure you didn’t hit your head against the bathtub?”

“Shut up! Yeah I… I kinda… Think I like him. _Think_.”

“Kinda think you like him… Well it’s a better answer than those you gave me before.” Mikey shrugs. “I guess that works for now. So, you’re gonna tell him _now_ , right? He’s outside just waiting to see you.”

“What? No! We got bigger problems now!”

“It’s the best time! Also, let’s be honest. Shit is gonna go down when our and his mom find out about everything. And how many chances you think you’re gonna have to see him then?” Gerard looks up worried, but stays silent. “Please Gee. Let yourself do what you really want. Apologize! You got a chance do re-start your life, so do it properly. Do something without seeing just the negative side that _you_ created.”

“Ugh. I think you’re right… But considering what you said, and surely is true, it’s not like we will fucking get married if I tell him I like him. It won’t change much.”

“Well yeah, but it will make him happy and you’ll stop hiding what you feel. It’s the perfect moment for that. Don’t forget they will also end up finding out about the party. Basically we are living our last moments on earth if you didn’t notice yet, dear brother. Carpe diem.”

“Are you sure you want me to get better? You are just stabbing me with words.”

 

**~~**

 

“A-Are you… Look, you don’t have to say that just to make me feel better. I understand what happened between us was just because you were drunk, just like our first kiss, and…”

“Frank, chill” Gerard laughs lightly “No, I’m not saying that to please you. I did that all these years to people and look where I am now.” He sighs. “And yes, I did that because I _wanted_ to. And I kissed you b-because… I think you are… You know.”

“I am…?”

“You know. The C word.”

“Oh god Gerard.” Frank gasps

“No! Wait, not that one. I meant…” Gerard breaths deep “Okay, fine. I think you are... Cute. That’s it. Fuck.” Gerard turns his head to the right side, so Frank wouldn’t see him blush.

Frank almost chokes.

"W-Wow. The drugs they gave you for the pain are _really_ strong.”

“Yes Frank” Gerard rolls his eyes “That’s why I slept all this time. Can you just accept what I said and we can end this awkward conversation?”

“Well, how did you expect me to react? You almost beat me up because I told you I love you.” Frank shrugs. “How can I know you are being serious?”

“Ok Frank, congrats. You just managed to ruin all my pride in two days. Here we go: You were right all along Frank. I ruined everything trying to act like something I ain’t. I’m done with that now. It just doesn’t work.” Gerard sighs “I don’t know how my life will be from now on. That’s why I just wanted to die… I was scared. If I died I wouldn’t have to deal with all this. I’m so weak and pathetic... I choose to live a lie and now I have nothing left. And it’s my own entire fault.”

“Hey. Don’t be like that” Frank says “What you mean you have nothing left? Did you forget about the contest? New York? Getting in an art school?” Gerard shakes his head “You still have a lot to achieve. Now you can finally dedicate yourself more for it. Don’t give up yet, Gee. You are alive even after… This is the universe giving you another chance to do things right! Can’t you see?”

“Are you serious Frank? You really believe I still have a chance to win that?” Gerard whispers. He’s blinking much slowly now, Frank notices.

“Yes! I-I felt so bad when you tried to… You know. I still want to accomplish my promise. I wanna help you.” Frank smiles softly.

“You know what Frank…” Gerard breaths heavily, fighting to keep his eyes open. “I love the way you love me. You are not like other people; you don’t like me because you see me as a mirror. You know all my defects and you still want me around, even being so different from you… That can’t be _any_ kind of love, can it?”

“N-No Gee.” Frank gasps, taken back by Gerard’s words, feeling tears drop out of his eyes. “Not at all.” He holds Gerard’s hand strongly as the older boy falls asleep.

 

**~~**

 

Gerard had to stay a week in the hospital, in observation. Donald would go back home in the afternoon to shower and eat, and come back to the hospital. He was shocked when he got home the first day and saw the big mess that the party resulted. Mikey and Frank had to clean everything in the same day, but they could sigh relieved when Donald agreed to not tell Donna about the party, for Gerard’s own good. Otherwise she would surely freak out.

The boys didn’t get the chance to see Gerard every day. Most of the time he was sleeping because of the strong medicine. But they decided to buy a cake and call Ray and Alicia to a little get together for when Gerard got out of the hospital on Friday night. They wanted to make Gerard see that he was not alone and had real friends who loved him. A brand new start.

They are all watching TV in the living room when they hear a car parking outside. Mikey turns off the TV fast, and they all get up by the front door. Some minutes later, the door is opened.

“SURPRISE!” they all scream.

“What is going on here?”

They lose their smiles.

“Mom?!”

 


	24. Chapter 24.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello u cute cute people.
> 
> Beware, fluffly is coming  
> The moment we all waited for  
> I know I'm excited, my nipples are hard  
> [dat reference]
> 
> I'm thinking of writing a new fanfic based on a game I'm playing :3 I think it would be soo cool but idk if the fact I'm a nerd contributes to that thought. We'll see. It would take some more time bcause I'm still writing another new unposted fanfic as well n__n
> 
> Thanks for the support guysssss, hope you like where the fic is getting

“Frankie!” Linda lets her purse fall of her shoulder and run inside to hold Frank tightly. The boy is too shocked but manages to retribute the hug. “Oh, my baby boy. I missed you more than anything.”

“I-I missed you too, mom.” She lets go of the hug to hold his arms and analyze his face. She smiles widely.

“Oh, you are such a beautiful boy. Did you get any taller?”

“Mom, I barely spent a month here” Frank says nervously. He wasn’t expecting at all that his mom would come back early, especially without calling him first. “Why didn’t you tell me you’re gonna be back?”

“I wanted to surprise you! Where is Donna?” Linda looks around and sees the other teenagers still with blank faces and all quiet. “Oh I’m sorry kids. I’m Linda, Frank’s mom. You must be his new friends that Gerard told me about! Oh where is him? I wanna meet him. Such a sweet boy. We talked on the phone.”

“H-Hi Mrs. Iero. I’m Mikey.” Mikey waves, smiling. He decided to make a move instead of pretending to be a part of the furniture like Ray and Alicia.

“Michael! You are so tall. You are a real man now, huh? Who knew, you used to be as short as Frank.” He laughs embarrassed. She looks back at Frank and just then realizes the ‘Welcome Back’ banner put on the wall near the colorful cake. “Oh, are you having a little party?”

“Oh is just that… G-Gerard was in the hospital for a week and he would come back tonight.” Mikey explains and Linda’s eyes widen.

“Oh god! What happened to him? Is it related to alcohol? Donna mentioned he had a big problem with…”

“No, no. He… Got physically hurt, let’s say.” Alicia says fast.

“Oh, well. I hope he is fine. Did Donna and Donald go pick him up?” She asks, getting her purse back from the floor and closing the front door.

“Well my dad is with him; mom had to go to my grandma’s house because she had to go through a surgery and needed a companion.” Mikey says and she nods.

“She didn’t tell me anything. How weird. Well, go pack your things then Frankie.” She says and Frank gulps.

“W-What? Alredy? I-I wasn’t expecting, mom…”

“I know. Me either, actually. But I’ll explain everything to you later” She says “To be honest, I got here yesterday night. I went home and slept until now. I was so jetlagged. I was going to call you but I had no time.”

“O-Oh…”

“Just get ready and when Gerard comes back and you all finish your little party we can go, okay?” She says and Frank nods. He doesn’t have a choice.

Suddenly the door opens.

“Uh, what’s going on here guys?” It’s Gerard, he’s holding a small bag on his hand and Donald is right behind him holding a bigger one.

“Surprise!” Ray says excited and everybody stares at him.

 

**~~**

 

After Gerard arrived it was very awkward in the beginning but they all started to talk and eat together, Linda was talking about all that happened in her travel, the climate got much less heavy. Not for Frank though. He feels guilty for being upset that his mom got back. He did ask her to come back as soon as possible, but he didn’t imagine she _really_ would. He doesn’t want to go back home, especially now that Gerard told him he like him the same way.

He is upstairs finishing packing his things up when Gee appears by the door frame.

“Hey!” He says and Frank bits his lower lip, closing the bag and putting it on the floor next to the bed.

“Hey.”

“So… You’re finally leaving, huh?” Frank nods quietly. “I’ll miss the adrenaline of opening the door to my own room to see you kiss a new guy.”

“Oh shut up!” Frank says and Gerard laughs, closing the door and sitting on Frank’s bed. Well, _his_ second bed now.

“It’s kinda sad being able to have privacy now… You know, going out and not having a midget following me around. Made me feel safe.”

“Stop it!” Frank punches Gerard’s lightly on the shoulder, smiling.

“But seriously now… If I could go back in time I would’ve tried to make it all different. _Better_. ” Gerard sighs, looking up at Frank. “Well, we did have fun in our own… Weird way, I guess?”

“Well, yeah. If you mean the fighting, the curses, death threats, the dirty looks you gave me and…”

“No!” Gerard rolls his eyes “I mean our deep conversations, you listening me babbler about my past, we sharing our art with each other” Frank smiles “Well, not _purposely_ sharing but anyway… Still counts.” Gerard shrugs.

“I know. It was very good to meet you Gee.” Frank says shyly. 

“It was good to meet you too, Frankie.” Gerard gets up from the bed to face Frank. “Well… We’ll still see each other, right?”

“S-Sure! Why not? I still have to annoy you until you finish your artwork.” Gerard smiles.

“True.”

“T-Thank you Gerard.”

“For what?” Gerard frowns.

“Well, you’ve finally decide to put yourself on top of your priorities. Anything you have now will be real. I-I’m so glad to see you better and happy. Alive, especially.” Gerard rolls his eyes, laughing.

“Ugh. Just kiss me alredy.” Frank has no time to answer as Gerard just holds his cheek with one hand and pulls him closer with the other hand, to kiss him.

There’s a soft knock on the door, and Mikey gets in slowly.

“Uuuh… I know I’m ruining the moment we all waited for but your mom wants to go now Frank.” Gerard lets go of Frank and the younger boy smiles sadly.

“Okay, thanks Mikey.”

Mikey and Donald help take Frank’s bag to the car. He exchanges phone numbers with Alicia and Ray, to keep in contact. They were alredy talking about having breakfast together soon. Before getting in the car, Frank thanked Donald for letting him stay, and fought all his shyness to just hug Gerard tightly before running into the car. The older boy couldn’t stop smiling until their car disappeared in the end of the street.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love this ending <3


	25. Chapter 25.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey

There’s just one week left of recess, and then the classes start again. Frank is not excited for it. He knows he won’t have real friends there, just some people to do group projects and have lunch together. It’s not enough for him now that he knows how good it is to have cool people to be close with. That’s why he keeps trying to convince his mom to transfer him to Mikey’s school. She just says she would think about it, but that’s not enough for him. He doesn’t want to be forgotten by his friends.

It’s about 2 am and Frank is sleeping, when his phone starts to ring. Annoyed, he takes it from the nightstand. It’s Gerard. He answers fast, worried.

“Hello? Gee?”

Gerard turned off. Frank frowns. In the same moment he gets a new text.

‘come outside –g’

Frank chuckles at the simple text. 

Frank yawns and gets up from the bed as silently as he can, since his mom’s bedroom is next to his. He puts on his shoes and goes to the bathroom to fix his hair and brush his teeth. He gets downstairs and opens the front door seeing Gerard sitting on the pavement.

“Gee. Hey.” Frank whispers. Gerard looks back, and smiles. He stands up and throws his cigarette on the floor, stepping on it. Frank closes the door and walks closely to him. “What are you doing here at this time?! Are you okay?”

“I can’t sleep. It’s not the same…” He smiles. “Oh… Did you brush your teeth? You smell like mint.”

“U-Uh…”

“Oh, so you were planning _something_ for now, weren’t you?” Gerard smirks and Frank looks down at his feet, ashamed. He did think Gerard would kiss him, so he preferred to prevent.

“N-No…I just-” Frank is interrupted as Gerard holds his chin up to kiss him. Frank easily lets the older boy’s tongue in his mouth as they share a long kiss.

“I missed you.”

“Y-You did?!” Frank looks up smiling, breathing fast from the kiss. Gerard nods. “Oh, did your mom come back alredy?”

“Uh, yeah. I also wanted to talk to you about it” He sighs. “Someone in the salon showed her the audio… Now she and my dad know it was you. She screamed at me and said she would talk to your mom about it.”

Frank’s eyes widen.

“What?! When was that?”

“About two days ago. But she’s too busy with work now to think about it. We’ll be fine.” Gerard assures.

“How would she forget about it?! Oh shit…” Frank gasps “My mom didn’t talk to her since she came back. I’m sure she will call your mom to thank her and all… oh god, she’s going to kill me! You can’t be here!” Frank pushes Gerard further to the street, trying to make him go away.

“Hey! You know you can’t fight me, you little thing.” Gerard frowns, and he gets Frank’s arms putting them behind his back, holding Frank close to him. The smaller boy groans. “We still didn’t finish what we started in the party.”

“Oh god! How can you say that now?” Frank fights for Gerard to let him go, and the older boy loses his grip.

“Relax. I’m just kidding, we’re in the middle of the street” Gerard answers embarrassed “What’s up with you?”

“Gerard, I hate to think like this of you, but you only said you liked me before we did something sexual. And…”

“Hey, wait.” Gerard frowns “You think I had the guts to tell you all that just because you sucked me off? Frank, I used to get with like 10 girls per party I go and I didn’t go around telling them I loved them or something.”

“It’s just… Ugh, this all happened so fast, it’s hard to believe. Sometimes I think I’m still high and living an illusion.” Frank sighs “And you said you _think_ you love me…”

“Well… It’s too early, I’m confused with all that’s going on.” Gerard admits. “I-I know I like you, though. I just had courage to express it when I was drunk. But now I see I was just being stupid, trying to fight away who I am… I’m gay and I wanna be with a guy and nothing can change it.” He shrugs “I wanted a chance... For the both of us. Just to try and see if… You know. If it works.”

“I don’t want to be just another guy in your life Gerard.” Frank confesses.

“Hey. I don’t want that either.” Gerard hugs Frank softly “Let’s just not think so much about the future, and focus on the present. Okay?”

“Okay… But will you tell your parents? Ray and Alicia? And my mom too?” Frank’s voice comes muffled from laying his head on Gerard’s chest.

“Wow- Ok, let’s slow down. I don’t think your mom will be very satisfied to see her perfect son with an older, unemployed alcoholic boy” Gerard laughs sarcastically.

“Well, I don’t care. I feel like I’m in a dream right now.” Frank says burying his face in Gerard’s neck. The older boy chuckles.

“Oh hey I have good news, I think you’ll like” Gerard says.

“What is it?” Frank smiles.

“I started an art project last week. I think I finally started to get it going” Gerard says and Frank hugs him tightly, in excitement.

“I knew you would make it!”

“Hey, calm down! I just started to work on an idea; I didn’t win the contest yet.” Gerard says and Frank laughs. He wanted to tell Gerard that he’s pretty sure he alredy won, but he didn’t want to sound too cheesy.

“It’s enough for me.” Frank says and they stay silent for a second. The street is really quiet as well, so quiet that it’s possible to hear his neighboor's TV. “So, you wanna come in?”

“Yeah, sure.”

 

**~~**

 

Frank pours two cups of Pepsi for him and Gerard, and gets a bag of chips to take upstairs. They have to be really quiet to not make their situation worse. He doesn’t really believe that his mom would dislike Gerard. Although they just talked on the phone, she did say he was a sweet boy the day she came back. Frank preferred to think positively.

When he gets in his bedroom, Gerard had opened the window to smoke while he looked over Frank’s desk.

“A little nosy aren’t we?” Frank laughs nervously, putting the food on his bed.

“I learned with the best.” Gerard answers; He takes a picture that is glued to Frank’s wall, that has a bunch of other pictures. Some of them are of Frank’s childhood, and most of the others of his mom, and other random things. He finds that very cute. “Who is this girl on the picture with you?”

“O-Oh” Frank gets behind Gerard to look over his shoulder “That is Katie. She is the first person who talked to me when I got in the new school. We usually do our group projects together.”

“I didn’t know you like to take pictures. Can I see your camera?” Frank shrugs and takes his black Canon camera from the drawer. “Wow. It’s beautiful. Why didn’t you take it to our house?”

“Mom didn’t let me. It’s a pretty expensive camera and...It was my dad’s.” Frank sighs. Gerard is kinda shocked because he never really heard about Frank’s dad before, and now he realized the reason he wasn’t brought up in any conversation it’s because he has alredy passed out.

“Oh Frankie… I’m so sorry, I didn’t know that he had…” Gerard stops himself unsure of how to say it and Frank frowns.

“Oh! No, no he didn’t die. It’s just that after the divorce he never even called me or mom anymore… He moved to Nevada.”

“Shit, wow. Was he the one who taught you how to take pictures?” Gerard asks.

“Yeah. We used to be close when I was about 10. He didn’t take them for a living, but it was his biggest hobby. Sometimes he was invited to take pictures of marriages and family trips. He got some money, but nothing much.”

“How about you? You wanna be a photographer?” Frank shrugs.

“I don’t think so. I’m not very talented and I don’t know anything about techniques and things like that.”

“Well that’s what college is meant for” Gerard laughs. Frank beats him on the shoulder. “No, but really, if you like it so much you should try. Isn’t that what you told me?”

“W-Well, yeah b-but… It’s dif-“

“Nope, it’s the same thing.” Frank crosses his arms and pouts “But we’ll talk about that some other time. Right now I’m hungry.”

Gerard sits on Frank’s bed, opening the chips.

“Your room looks so boring.”

“Thanks. I’ll surely invite you over more often.”

“It’s just too plain, you need some colors here. And actions figures. And band posters. Something more appropriated for your age.”

“Is that how your teenager room was?”

“Well, yeah. But mostly because I was an antisocial nerd.” Frank laughs, sitting next to Gerard and drinking his soda.

“Quit smoking here! My mom will smell it in the morning.”

“Relax. I opened the window. Just throw some perfume later.” Gerard throws his cigarette out of the window. “Hey, did you hear about what happened to Lynz?”

“W-What happened to her?” Frank gasps.

“God, you are such a _terrible_ liar.” Gerard laughs. “Someone beat her up pretty bad. People are saying she looks like Marilyn Manson now. Well, if he got stung in the face by a bunch of bees.”

“That’s so cruel!” They both laugh.

“So, that means we aren’t the hottest trend in town anymore, huh.”

“I hope so.” Frank sighs. “Hey, do you still talk to your… Old friends? Or whatever they were?”

“Nah. Most of them turned their backs for me. Some others said they didn’t mind but they still talk to everyone so… I’d rather not get involved with those people anymore. They could set me up to something or whatever. I don’t really care about them now. I never _really_ did, I guess. It was mostly about how they would see me that I worried about.” Gerard says and Frank nods.

“So you don’t miss them? Being popular and all?”

“No. It was all fake... If I won the contest their reaction would probably be the same anyway.” Gerard shrugs “But I wouldn’t insist on that if it wasn’t for _you_ pushing me.”

“Good to know it has an effect after all.”

“Shut up!” They laugh. “So… Did you just bring me here to eat all your food? Not that I’m complaining. Go on, I won’t stop you.”

“W-Well, what else would we do?” Frank smiles nervously.

“I know what else.” Gerard smirks.

**~~**

 

When Frank woke up next morning, Gerard had alredy left. All they did was make out all over Frank’s bed and touch each other over their clothes, but that was enough to make Frank blush the entire time when he remembers about last night.

“Frank” His mom suddenly opens the door, alredy dressed up “Go take a shower and eat something. We need to go the Way’s house right _now_."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> don't be like gerd ok throwing cigarettes all over our planet


	26. Chapter 26.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi
> 
> Sorry I'm slow on the updates, I said I wouldn't, it's just that I'm going through a bad time and don't feel like writing because it would affect the stories in a bad way, I really don't want to disappoint you, even if I take a long time I won't abandon my fanfics
> 
> enjoy

Linda is alredy waiting in the car while Frank is locking the front door, holding his toast on his other hand. He didn’t even try to ask his mom the reason they would go to the Way’s house at 10 am on a Saturday. He doesn’t know how much _she_ knows, after all.

The whole way there his mom is silent, but she doesn’t seem to be in a bad mood. About 15 minutes later they arrive. Donald’s car is parked outside. Before Frank opens the door, Linda stops him.

“Frank, if you have _anything_ to tell me, just do it now, please. I don’t want to receive bad news about my own son from someone else.” She says. Frank looks down at his feet “You always told me everything, right? We never hide anything from each other.”

“I did nothing bad, mom. I swear. I-I went out with my friends but I didn’t do anything wrong.” He says. She sighs.

“Well, I believe in you. But Donna seemed pretty angry earlier today on the phone. I could barely understand what she was saying. She said a lot of things.” Frank just nods, unsure of what to say. Linda gets out of the car and Frank follows her fast. They get to the front door and knock.

“Hold on!” A voice screams from inside. A few moments later, Donald opens the door. “Hey! Are you staying with us for another week, Frank? Huh?” He messes with Frank’s hair and the boy just smiles embarrassed. Gerard did say that his dad found out the two of them were in the closet together. But it didn’t seem like it.

“Donna called me, saying she had to talk to me? Since it’s about Frank, and I trust my son _very_ well, I decided to bring him so he can defend himself. I’m sure there’s just a misunderstood.” Linda says and Frank’s eyes widen. He didn’t imagine he was being invited for World War III.

“Oh, I’m gonna call her then. She’s upstairs. But come on in, get a sit.” They get in and Linda puts her purse on the sofa, sitting down.

“I-Is Mikey here?”

“Yes, he’s in his room. Come on.” Frank goes fast upstairs, with Donald. He wanted to ask about Gerard but he didn’t want to refresh the man’s memory in case he forgot what he heard. Which is impossible in his head. But he still feels like it’s not a good thing to do.

He hears music playing and knocks on Mikey’s door.

“Get out, mom. I alredy told you I don’t wanna see anyone while I’m listening Radiohead.”

“It’s me, Mikey! Frank!” he hears some steps and then the door is opened. Soon Frank gets suffocated in Mikey’s hug, just like the first day he came here.

“Oh god Frankie! It’s so good to see you. I thought you forgot about me alredy.” Mikey lets go of the hug and motions for Frank to come in. He closes the door then.

“Mikey, we texted yesterday.”

“I know I know. Sorry.” Frank sits on Mikey’s bed and looks around. Everything looks pretty much the same. Except for the smell.

“Ew. Have you been smoking pot here?”

“Ugh, it’s terrible right? Ray opened the window but this fucking smell just sticks to the furniture!” He complains, lowering the volume of the music.

“You should throw some perfume around.” Frank says, remembering what Gerard had told him last night.

“Oh yeah! Good idea Frankie.” Mikey smiles “See. This house needs _you_ to function properly.”

“Where is Gee?” Frank asks as Mikey opens his wardrobe to get a bottle of cologne he kept there for years. His mom got it for free when she bought hair products for the salon. But he always thought it smelled like an old lady should, so he never used before.

“In the basement, working on his art project.” Frank frowns.

“I thought he was okay with working on his room after all.”

“Yes, but he said he needed more space. I don’t know. Artists. You just don’t get them.” Mikey pours the cologne all over the room, the smell spreads fast. “Shit, this is even worse. Smells like pure alcohol. Dammit Frank.”

Frank starts to sneeze.

“Ugh, let’s get out of here!”

“Run for your life!”

 

**~~**

 

When the boys get downstairs Donna and Linda are alredy talking. Donald is just sitting there, quiet. Frank gulps. He didn’t even tell Mikey anything.

“Hi Mrs. Iero. Did you come to rent Frank for us again?”

“Michael, not now! We are having a serious conversation. Go call your brother, fast. It’s important.” Donna says and Mikey shrugs, leaving.  

“Son, sit here please.” Linda asks, in a serious tone. Frank walks till the sofa and sits next to her, as calm as he can pretend to be.

“So, continuing. Gerard then forced Frank to drink a bottle of vodka in order to persuade him to perform oral sex.”

Frank chokes and starts to breathe heavily. He doesn’t have any courage to look up to his mom, to see her reaction. But he can pretty much imagine, and it wasn’t pretty.

“H-How can you know all that being so far away?”

“Somehow it was all recorded and spread to a lot of people _. A lot_.” Donna answers. Frank hears his mom sighs. “Unfortunately, the audio seems to be cut. It just starts when Frank is alredy drinking. But I’m sure they are hiding whatever led them to this point.”

“Hey, what’s up?” Gerard and Mikey get in the living room. The older boy had paint all over his old band t-shirt and grey sweatpants. He still had gauze around his arms, but this time they were blank, not with some blood drops like before. “Hi Frankie!”

“H-Hi Gee.” Frank says quietly, looking up fast at Gerard and then back to his lap. Gerard frowns, realizing something is not right.

“Gerard. Sit.” His mom says between her teeth. Frank is glad that at least Donald kept his promise and didn’t tell her it all happened in a party. Seeing Donna so serious made him wonder that if she knew the whole truth, they would even be alive right now. Probably not.

“Oh no mom, are you still serio-“

“Quiet.” She snaps, and Gerard just sighs and sits down in the armchair in front of the sofa they were. Donna gets her phone and plays the audio her friend sent her.

_‘Woah, slow down! Drink it slowly. We have time.”_

_“_ _I-I know, it’s just… I want it to be good. But it won’t be if I’m myself”_

Frank closes his eyes, putting his hands on his face, feeling humiliated. There is a difference between people he doesn’t even know listening that away from him, and his own mom and the Way’s listening in their _own_ living room.

_“Hey… Calm down. I know you didn’t do anything like this before. I’ll keep my expectations low, ok?”_

_“That sounds too pitiful for a moment like this”_

_“Oh shut up” *Gerard’s laugh* “I’ll guide you, okay? We’ll go slow….Well… You wanna touch me?”_

Donna pauses.

“Gerard lets it very clear he knows Frank isn’t the kind of boy who would engage in such activities, but he stills pushes him to it.” She presses the play button again.

_“F-Frank… Please…Just… Do like you do to yourself._

_“Ah, ah, ah. F-Frankie… U-Use your mouth, please?”_

_“A-Ahh… Frank… Shit… Oh… Yeah, baby. Your mouth is so good.”_

_“Hey!! Stop whatever you are doing; I’m going to open the door”_

“That’s all we got.” Donna says, putting her phone away. “Now, Gerard and Frank… What I’d like to know is _how_ that all happened.”


	27. Chapter 27.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello guys  
> The show must go on right  
> Thank you soooooooooo much for your support. ^-^ ♥ ♥ ♥
> 
> This is kinda heavy :c

“Frankie? Hey. It’s Mikey. Open your eyes, I know you are awake now.”

Frank slowly opens his eyes and sees Mikey. The boy smiles and helps Frank to sit up, offering him a cup of water.

“Drink it. I put a bit of sugar there to calm your nerves.”

Frank says nothing, just takes it and drinks it all at once. He’s honestly tired of passing out. He looks around and sees he’s on the sofa, but he and Mikey are the only one’s there.

“Mikey, what hap-“

“NO YOU WON’T! YOU WILL TELL THE TRUTH RIGHT NOW!” They are interrupted by screams coming from the kitchen. Mikey sighs.

“You had an… Anxiety attack? I don’t know, I’m not a doctor. All I know is you freaked out and started to hyperventilate and cry. It was pretty scary. I had to discuss a lot with them to leave you alone and continue their fight elsewhere. They even wanted to call an ambulance but I’m pretty sure none of us wants to go back to a hospital _that_ early, right?” Mikey sits down next to Frank.

“R-Right. Thanks, Mikey.” Frank says. Then he remembers more… “Oh shit… I feel so humiliated. I knew sometime they would know, but... It’s terrible!”

“Well, yeah.” Mikey sighs “Basically my mom thinks Gerard raped you.”

“W-What?! No! I have to talk to th-“

“Frankie, please. Don’t get involved. They are screaming like crazy there, you just passed out and…”

“No Mikey, I have to!” Before Mikey can do anything, Frank runs to the kitchen. When he opens the door he sees them sitting on the table, Donna’s face was red in angriness and Linda just had a worried expression. He doesn’t know which one is worse.

“Frank! Are you feeling better? You need anything?” Donald asks, getting up from his chair. “Here, sit down.”

Frank shakes his head, and breathes deeply.

“You are being so unfair to Gerard!” He says, angry. Mikey gets in the kitchen and all he can think is _‘oh fuck’_. “He is _not_ a rapist, he didn’t plan any of this and neither did I! Some girls set us up because they thought it would be fun. I-I did what I did because I felt like it.”

“Frankie, how can you say that?” Linda says, shaking her head “You never even kissed before. You are such an innocent boy.”

“Well, actually that's not true because I took his first kiss Mrs. Iero” Mikey says, dragging everybody’s attention. Gerard makes a face at him that said ‘ _are you dumb?_ ’. “What? I’m trying to divide your guilty. You should thank me.”

“Look Donna, the reason why I asked you to take Frank is because I trusted you and believed this would be a good environment for him to stay while I was gone, so I wouldn’t have to worry and concentrate on my work. Now I come back and you tell me your son kissed mine and the other one, which is older than Frank, made him perform oral sex on him.” Linda says, laughing nervously “Seriously, this has to be some kind of cruel joke, right? You can’t be serious.”

“Mom, please listen to me!” Frank begs looking at her “It happened in the heat of the moment! I’ve been liking Gerard for some time now, I just didn’t know how to tell you, and he kept denying me. He didn’t force me to do anything, I swear! Do you think I’d be so worried about him when he got in the hospital if he had raped me? Or even right now I would defend him? You know me mom.” Linda sighs.

“Exactly!” Donna says “You are defending him because you have a crush on him, Frank. You don’t see that Gerard used that innocent feeling to induce you to have sexual acts with him.”

“Jesus Christ mom! Do you even hear yourself?” Gerard says indignated “I’m your _son_! Don’t you know me at all? How can you think I would ever take advantage of a kid?”

“You did!” Donna says “What do you have in your head, Gerard? If they sue you, you could even be arrested for that! How stupid can you be?”

“I DID NOT RAPE HIM. I LOVE FRANK.” Gerard screams. Everybody gets shocked “He, mom, the _fucking_ sixteen year old boy that you all see as a silly little kid, worries for me like _nobody_ ever did before. He cares about me much more than _you_ ever did. He offers me comfort and support, he listens to me... Nothing that you and dad ever tried to do! You never cared! I would get home every day, hurt. I turned into a bitter, cold person, day by day just getting worse, but you never gave a shit, you never asked one question, you never questioned what was happening at school. You never questioned why I didn’t want to go out on the weekends to the mall like we used to. You never questioned why I had stopped drawing. You never questioned why I didn’t go to prom. You never questioned why I didn’t have _any_ friends. You never took me seriously. All you did was blame me and shove in my face that I’m useless and old and should leave your house alredy. You never cared for my pain. I was a mess, mom. I was a fucking mess. I was ruining my life. Then Frank appeared and saved me. At first I didn’t take him seriously, like you do. You think it’s cute to classify him as “innocent, naïve boy”? He’s _nothing_ like that! He’s so deep, and sensible, and smart. What you do to people is make them feel as small as possible, just so you can feel you have control over everything! I won’t accept that you turn everybody against me, and call me a rapist to my fucking face. That is disgusting. Because I love him, and he loves me like I never was loved before. He loves everything you hate in me, and you just can’t _accept_ that, right? The idea of someone accepting me for who I am _disturbs_ you. He made me get the courage to admit I’m gay, to admit I love my art and I have some talent, and also to tell all that to your fucking face right now because I’m _tired_!”.

Donna just stared wide eyed at Gerard, unsure of what to say. She opens her mouth, but doesn’t say anything. Just gets up from the chair and goes upstairs, fast. Donald sighs.

“Son, give your mother some time. She is just shocked, it’s all. She had a tough week.”

“I know dad, but I won’t accept that she calls me a _rapist_! That’s the most disgusting thing in the world. How can I be okay with my own mother seeing me as nothing but a…A worm?” Gerard sobs and Frank’s heart breaks a little. He hates to see Gerard crying, even if that just happened a few times.

He doesn’t know what he should do or say anymore. Even with his mom being silent and just in shock with the whole situation, he just goes and hugs Gerard tightly.

“You are nothing like that, Gee. They don’t know you like _I_ do. They don’t” Frank says, and starts to cry too. He hates that this all is happening to Gerard and some part of him still believes it’s his fault, even after all Mikey said. Even with Gerard not being mad at him for not stopping what they were doing in the closet.

“Face it, Frank. You’re the only person that sees me as anything good. I’m shit.” Gerard says, breaking the hug. Frank shakes his head frantically .

“No, don’t talk like this about yourself, please. You were so positive before. Don’t let this ruin everything we built up together, please.” Frank begs and Gerard sighs. His mom finally gets up from the chair and decides it’s time to speak up on all of this.

“Look, Gerard.” the boy looks at her, surprised “I don’t know what got you two to that situation; I don’t know what you told Frank to convince him of anything. But you did get my son drunk before asking him to perform those acts on you. I have all the reason in the world to be angry at you and even sue you. Make you stay a million miles away from my son, forever.”

“Mom, no! Please…” Frank begs.


	28. Chapter 28.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hallo  
> posting really fast a a a   
> sorry for torturing you but it will be worth it ;-; heh  
> thanks for comments, kudos, etc.  
> ♥

“Mom, no! Please…” Frank begs.

“I’m not finished yet Anthony. I _could_ do all that and freak out like Gerard's mom did. But what I heard from his mouth shocked me much more than two teenagers getting it on.” Frank blushes and looks down “I don’t wanna be like your mom, Gerard. I don’t wanna _act_ like her. I love my son, he’s too precious for me. I always want to protect him. But I’m aware that he is growing up. And I wanna trust him so I can be by his side and help him with his decisions, guide him. I don’t want to be left behind for not understanding his feelings. I wanna let him speak, and actually listen. Yes, I am angry that nobody told me anything until now… But I’ve never seen my son express love for someone else but me and his father. And that always made me worry. I thought he wouldn’t know what love is when he found it, _if_ he ever found it. But I see now how much you take care of each other’s feelings, and protect yourselves _together_. And I think that is beautiful and should not be looked at with malicious eyes. You both made a mistake and I'll keep an eye on you, but I won’t judge you _just_ for that because I know you are much more.”

“W-Wow, Mrs. Iero. I… I don’t know what to say I just… Thank you. Seriously. I needed to hear that.” Gerard says, still feeling a bit lost in all this confusion.

“Mom, you are the best. I would never leave you behind. Never.” Frank smiles, hugging her.

“Linda, those were beautiful words.” Donald sighs “I wish Donna would see things the way you do. Well, I also feel a lot of guilty on my back. I should’ve given you boys more attention, not just on my work.”

“Oh dad. At least you never misjudged me or called me those terrible things like she did.” Gerard says, hugging his dad fast “Mikey told me you didn’t tell mom about the party. Thank you. You tried to help us, I appreciate that.”

“Well son, it’s great that we are all understanding each other and settling things down. But this is not over. You three committed a mistake. You broke the rules, you disrespected us.” Donald says, he breaths deeply and puts his hand on his forehead. “Your mom is going through a hard time. Your grandma’s health is not the best, and she worries. She’s not a stone, like you think. She is just a woman who suffered a lot during her life, and build up a strong resistance. That usually makes her see other’s suffering as something small that they can take care of, just like she did.”

“I get it, but she also has to understand that not everybody is like her!” Mikey interrupts.

“I know boys, I know. We'll still have to settle things out with her. All I’m asking is a little patient, please. She’s your mom and she loves you both. She worked a lot to raise you two. Don’t forget that, please.” Donald gives a sympathetic smile and Gerard forces himself to nod. He still doesn’t agree. He’s too indignated and disappointed with his mom. But his dad is holding on a lot on his back too. He deserves some peace. “Thank you. I’ll talk to her.”

 

**~~**

 

Gerard, Frank and Linda had lunch together in a small restaurant near the Way’s house. She wanted to know more about Gerard as he is Frank’s first relationship and she feels she has to keep an eye on him, especially after seeing they don’t have a problem with being intimate too fast. Frank wanted to just disappear when his mom gave them a lecture about safe sex. Gerard just kept nodding and holding back his laugh at Frank’s flushed face.

Linda takes the boys back home about 3 pm, but lets Frank there since Gerard promised to take the boy home later. He wasn’t sure how much time they would get together. His mom really scared him with her overreaction.

They stay outside on the sidewalk, kinda afraid to go inside alredy.

“So... Your mom is really nice.” Gerard says, lighting up his cigarette “God. It was hard to control myself to not smoke in front of her.”

“Like that would be worse than she hearing me going down on you?” Frank says, looking down at his feet.

“Wow. Look at you. Learning fast with me, huh?” they laugh “I was afraid she would take a banana and do the whole condom thing right there in the restaurant.”

“Oh god! That’s so over the line. _Even_ for you.” Gerard smiles.

“Well… At least she was positive about us... Now.”

“Oh Gee…” Frank hugs him “They are all on our side now. Soon your mom will see we are better together than separated.”

“Well, she alredy kinda knows how good we _work_ together.”

“Can you talk about anything without relating it to that audio of us?”

“Nope.” Frank groans, letting go of the hug. Gerard laughs “It’s the only thing I can think about” he jokes.

“Hey… I gotta know something… I was just too embarrassed to talk about it in front of everybody” Frank says and as Gerard is about to open his mouth, he interrupts “Don’t you _dare_ make a joke about that audio again!” Gerard laughs, rolling his eyes “It’s serious. So…” Frank hates himself, he can feel he’s alredy warm and blushing “When you said you love me… In front of them… Was it like, in the heat of the moment? Because you were angry and all or…”

“No! I meant that” Gerard frowns; he throws his cigarette on the floor and holds Frank’s hands. “I meant every single word I said there, Frankie.” He sighs “All the things I’ve been keeping to myself all this time… I feel like a _huge_ weight was removed from my back. You know, after last night in your house, I realized I’ll never meet someone like you. Sure, there are lots of short, cute and nosy boys everywhere but...”

“Hey! Shut up.” Frank punches his arm lightly, they laugh.

“No, seriously now. I spent the whole morning remembering every single one of our conversations… The way you look at me, and holds me and protects me. You care so much. I feel like I can talk about anything with you, that you won’t judge me or something. You always listen. I want that. I want you.” Gerard holds Frank’s face with both hands “I want to be with you, and kiss you, and try to make you feel at least a little bit like you make me feel. With you I feel I’m capable of anything and I always want to feel that way.”

“Aw, Gee… I love you!” Frank tries to control his tears, holding Gerard tightly. The older boy sighs.

“Don’t ever leave my side, Frankie. I’d be lost without you.”


	29. Chapter 29.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi guys. Do you miss me? Cause I miss you. omg ok i  
> I know I'm late as hell and that as a writer I'm a great trash can but well I promised you that I wouldn't abandon this fic and I won't. I don't want to, believe me!  
> So much happened in the last months that just seriously... fuhked me up. x)  
> I'm kinda empty right now and though hey maybe going back to my fics will cheer me up. I love writing and have more fics that I would love to share with you in the future as well. 
> 
> ok... I talk too much. Go read now if u still want to x)

Frank rubs his eyes and sighs, looking at the clock to confirm it is 7:30 am, just half hour until the first day of school start. He isn’t excited at all, since his mom didn’t have time to transfer him to Mikey’s school. He gets up and goes to the bathroom to take a quick shower. He puts on his jeans, red sweater and a black jacket. As he looks in the mirror he decides it’s time to cut his hair, it’s just a bit above his shoulders now. He blushes thinking about how Gerard likes to grab his hair while they make out. Maybe he’d let it like this for a bit more.

“Frankie! Aren’t you ready yet? You’re gonna be late on your first day!” Linda appears by the door, putting her earrings on.

“Relax, mom. Nobody gets there on time on the first day.” He says, getting his backpack and phone that was charging on his desk.

“Well, that’s not a reason to get late. I’ll give you a ride today, c’mon. Hurry!” She goes downstairs, annoyed. Frank doesn’t care because he is still in “recess mood” which makes him not give a shit about what time it is or getting to school. He just wants to hang out with his friends.

His mom is staring at him with a _not so_ happy face as he locks the front door and runs to the car.

“Frank, I know you are upset that I didn’t transfer you to another school but I don’t want you to devalue your studies just because you aren’t with your friends!” she says.

“Whatever.” That is all he says and she sighs. After some time she speaks again.

“Do you want me to pick you up so we can have lunch together?”

“No, Gee will pick me up after school. We’re going to the mall.” Frank smiles softly. His mom doesn’t like it but forces a smile. She’s happy that he’s in love like any teenager should, but she doesn’t want to be substituted.

“Oh. That’s… Nice.”

“It will be our first real date.”

“So, how’s Donna? Did she say something? I still didn’t have the courage to call her.” Linda sighs.

“They are basically ignoring each other.”

“That’s terrible!”

“Yeah. But she’s busy with work and so is Gerard.”

“Oh, yeah? What does he do? You didn’t tell me yet.” Frank bits his lower lip.

“W-Well, he’s working on an art project for a contest in New York.”

“Oh. So he doesn’t have a job or study?”

“Not yet. But I know he will win and he’ll get in a great college and all.” Frank says and his mom just nods quietly. He knows that’s not a very good reaction.

“Well, have a good first day!”

 

**~~**

 

Frank spent his classes and lunchtime texting his friends, except Gerard since he’s not into it. The boy is not sad, because they will spent the whole day together and he’s more nervous than ever. It would be their first _real_ date. Thinking about it now, Gerard never asked him to be his boyfriend, and they never called each other like that. It’s quite confusing, but he thinks their feelings mean much more than a label. He knows Gerard doesn’t just say “I love you” to anyone.

The rest of the classes weren’t that bad, but Frank is really excited to the photography class he would have tomorrow. He remembers how Gee smiled looking at the photos he took. That warms his heart.

Finally, the first day is over. Frank goes outside, watching all the buses leaving and the school getting less crowded. He sits on the bench there is in the parking lot, so Gerard would find him easier when he arrives in his Dad’s car.

“Well, well, well, look who we finally found here. Gerard Way’s little slut.” Frank gets his eyes away from his phone and looks up to see five creepy guys, all wearing black and lots of piercings. He frowns.

“Who are you?”

“We are Lynz’s friends, and we’d like to return the gift you sent her.” The taller boy with long black hair says. Frank doesn’t think much and just tries to run, but other two boys hold him back. He groans and struggles trying to make them lose their grips but they are much stronger than him. They are probably seniors.

“Please, I didn’t do anything to her. Let me go.” Frank begs, feeling ashamed for it but he cares much more about _not_ ending up in the hospital. The boys laugh.

“God, you are such a pitiful little kid. Hold him tight, boys” the taller boy punches Frank’s stomach and he falls on his knees, still being hold up by his arms. “How you like that, fag?”

“I-I don’t, please…” Frank keeps coughing and tries to hold his belly to reduce the pain but his hands can’t reach with those guys holding him up.

“Let me, now. I wanna ruin his stupid faggot face.” Another boy says, getting in front of Frank and holding his head up to punch it.

“Hey you! What are you doing!? Let go of the boy!”

The guys look back as they hear screaming, and let go of Frank. They run to the back of the school. Frank falls on his face on the floor, hugging himself and still coughing a lot. He’s glad he doesn’t see any blood at least.

“Hey, kid, you awake?” Frank is still groaning and looks up to see a man that looks about his forties, he has short black hair, wears glasses and by the way he’s dressed up he’s probably a teacher. “Good, you are.” The man sighs. “Let’s go, I’ll take you to the infirmary.” The man helps Frank get up but he just sits back on the bench.

“N-No! I can’t, I’m waiting for someone to pick me up.”

“You can’t stay here, those vandals could come back!” The man objects, Frank just shakes his head “Do you know them?”

“No, they just said they are Lindsay’s friend and started to hit me.” Frank cries out and the man sits next to him.

“Who is Lindsay?”

“I-It’s a long story. It doesn’t matter.” Frank says, and winces in pain. “Ugh. Assholes.”

“Are you sure you’ll be alright?” the man asks worried.

“Yes, I do. B-By the way… Thank you. If it wasn’t for you they’d put me in the hospital” Frank sighs.

“Don’t worry. I see kids getting bullied here all the time now… I do my best to support them. I’m trying to start an anti-bullying campaign but it’s hard to get students to help.” He says. Frank looks at him, confused “Oh, I think I forgot to introduce myself. I’m Mr. Cohen, art teacher.”

“I’m Frank Iero. W-Wow, it’s hard to find a teacher that cares so much about that.”

“Yeah, and that’s a big problem too.” Cohen sighs. “Some years ago I used to see my own students get bullied and didn’t interfere. That made me feel _very_ guilty. I do the best I can now.” Frank nods.

“That’s amazing, I would love to help. But I’m not sure if I’ll stay in this school for too long.”

“What? Because of those kids?” Cohen frowns.

“No, no! I wanted to transfer way before them. I wanna go to where my friends study. It’s the first time I’m having friends, so I wanna enjoy that at least in the last years of school.”

“Well, you are right.” Cohen says “But for now, if you want to… Just stick around room 203 after the classes.”

“Sure.” Frank smiles softly. The teacher did save him so he feels he should return the favor.

“Good.” Cohen smiles back and rubs Frank’s shoulder. “Well, I should go now.” Frank nods, and they both look up as they see a car stopping near them.

“Gee!” Frank gets up and takes his backpack, watching as Gerard gets out of the car. He is frowning and not with a very happy look on his face. “You okay?” Frank asks, worried.

“Yeah, yeah” the older boy answers quietly, holding Frank in his arms and kissing him. The boy blushes hard, remembering the teacher is still there. But when he looks back to the bench to say goodbye, Cohen is alredy far away going back to the building.

“How weird.” Frank murmurs

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> can I just share something with you? Nothing to do with the fic  
> well maybe it means nothing but who knows  
> If you didn't see, some fan sent a pic to Frank, a photoshop of him and Gerard together and wrote "why is this so adorable" or something and he didn't like (well, he's tired of hearing about frerard even tho the person didn't mention that exactly) ANYWAY they got a lot of shit from other fans and apparently deleted their twitter or something. I just can't get it out of my head and as I don't use twitter I'd like to know if any of you knew them (geewayisgay101) or idk I just need to know if they are ok. Based on a print I saw of their profile they seemed to be a very young fan and I'm worried because people got angry and said very mean things, I want to know if they are ok


	30. Chapter 30.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh god, I can't even believe I'm finally back. Tbh I thought that wouldn't happen in this year  
> I would say that I'm sorry for taking such a long ass time again but to be honest, this time it really wasn't my fault since I couldn't do anything about it x_x I had family problems and didn't have my computer for soo many weeks, it sucked, but I'm taking care of myself and got able to get it back.  
> Obviously I got completely disconnected from this fic, I'm only posting now because I have a few chapters saved here, which I didn't on my pen drive so I couldn't post in another computer.  
> So after this chapter I will work very hard to keep writing it, it might take a little time but I won't give up because I love writing it, but I have to get back to it, mentally and all. Does it make sense? 
> 
> Well, you probably need to read again at least the last chapter to understand this one better, I guess  
> I'm sorry that it had to happen, I hate not posting for such a long time..

Frank decides to not tell Gerard about what happened in the parking lot, because he knows he would get too angry and their date would be ruined. But as they are in the car on the way to the mall, Gerard keeps a very serious face and doesn’t take his eyes off the road. He doesn’t even put music on.

“Gee, are you sure you’re okay? Did your mom tell you something?” Frank asks as they are getting out of the car –Donald’s car.

“No. Why were you talking to _that_ man in the parking lot?” Gerard asks, still serious, hands in his pockets as he walks and that kinda kills Frank’s expectations to walk hand in hand with Gerard.

“Oh, n-nothing much.” Frank shrugs. “Why?”

“Nothing much.” Is all Gerard says and they keep walking until the entrance of the mall, quietly.

 

**~~**

 

Frank really feels something is wrong as Gerard doesn’t talk much and they go to the food court. As it’s a Monday, the mall is not crowded at all, letting them choose freely where to sit or eat. But Gerard just sits there, looking down at the table, uninterested.

“Did I do something?” Frank says after some time, tired of the silence.

“No.”

“Then why are you like that?” Gerard sighs.

“You are lying to me.”

“What?!” Frank says “What would I lie about?”

“You didn’t say why you were talking to that man on the school parking lot.”

“God, Gerard. He’s a teacher! I can’t believe you are jealous of…”

“It’s not about that!” Gerard says, looking up. Frank frowns. “That man is Mr. Cohen. He was my art teacher when I was in high school. He’s a piece of shit!”

“What you mean, Gerard?” Frank sees as Gerard’s eyes are full of hurt and he gets very confused. “What did he do to you?”

“He used to see all the times I got bullied during his class and didn’t do anything! Even when I asked help, he just told me to ignore the kids.” Gerard answers, angrily “Every single project he made us do I’d draw really sad characters and he’d tell me I should draw happy things, that the school wouldn’t put my drawing in display because they were full of sorrow and too heavy for the other kids.”

“W-Wow… I’m sorry Gee. I didn’t know... I couldn’t know!” Frank corrects.

“Why were you talking to him?!” Gerard asks again, still angry.

“I-I just!” Frank sighs “Ugh, I didn’t want to ruin our date with this, but it’s pretty much ruined alredy… While I was waiting for you, some of Lindsay’s friends cornered me to beat me up. They wanted me to put in the same state as she is in the hospital. One of them, a tall one, punched me in the stomach. But Mr. Cohen saved me! He stopped them.”

“What? Why?” Gerard frowns. “That piece of shit never helped _me_.”

“I-I… He said later he’s working on an anti-bullying project. He invited me to participate.”

“No you won’t!”

“But Gee! It’s a good reason.” Frank pleads “I want to help and return the favor. He saved me.”

“No Frank. That man is a cold-hearted asshole. He’s just doing all this now to get rid of his regret. I bet he just sat and watched a bunch of kids getting bullied all these years, just like most teachers. Now he wants to pretend to be a hero. Dick.”

Frank looks down at his lap. This is not the day he expected to have. Gerard sighs.

“I’m sorry Frankie. You are way more important than that asshole. Does it hurt too bad?”

“No. Not anymore.” Frank answers, still looking down.

“I wish I could do something about it. I’d hate that you start getting picked on because of me.”

“I don’t care about them” Frank says, looking at Gerard’s eyes “Please, can we start all over? I really want us to have a good time.”

“Sure, sure.” Gerard smiles weakly. “So, how was your day despite that?”

 

**~~**

 

After getting lunch, the boys spent the rest of the afternoon walking around in the mall, getting in libraries and cd stores and having long conversations about all kinds of things. About 6 pm they went outside to the mall’s garden to eat some ice cream. They sat near the parking lot, watching the sun go down.

“Who knew that one day we’d be like this, huh?” Gerard says and Frank chuckles.

“It’s like you say. Shit happens.”

“You know, I have until Friday to send my art project to the gallery.” Frank’s eyes widen and he puts his ice cream down.

“Oh shit! What do we do?” Gerard laughs at his reaction.

“I feel like you are way more anxious about it than me.”

“W-Well, it’s just that you were so lost about what to do and now it’s getting so close…”

“What if I told you it is ready? Huh?” Gerard raises one eyebrow.

“No way!” Frank gasps “How could you do it so fast and all of sudden?”

“All of sudden? I felt more alive these last two weeks than I ever felt in _years_ ” Gerard sighs “I had a near death experience in case you forgot, Frankie.” Frank bits his lower lip, looking down at his ice cream that now melted in his hands. “N-no, I didn’t mean to… Sorry. I ruined our date again, didn’t I?”

“No! It’s just… It was a shock, you know?” Frank says “I’ve never seen so much blood… I was so afraid that night. God, so _fucking_ afraid I’d never get to see you again. I believed so much in you, I felt terrible thinking that all you’d still have to live was gone.”

”I know, it was probably the most stupid thing I’ve ever done” Gerard says, caressing his arms that were no longer bandaged. “I-I thought you hated me. You looked so sad when you heard that audio. I thought you’d never want to see me again or something.”

“I wouldn’t do that” Frank says, looking up “It wasn’t our fault that was leaked. But this all could be avoided if I had stopped you, I…” Frank sighs “Honestly, I don’t know how you don’t hate me for it… You were drunk. I was too, but I was more sober than you, you had drank all night. I had to stop you… I just _had_ to. But I didn’t, because I wanted to see what it was like to be with you.” Frank blushes.

“No, Frank. I wouldn’t want you to stop for that.” Gerard shakes his head “Not at all. I’ve been wanting you for a long time, more than ever now.” He holds Frank’s hand, the younger boy smiles widely “I don’t want you to feel guilty. I loved every single minute of it. And you know what? If I had to go back in time I’d do it all over again. And maybe even _more_.”

“Gerard!” Frank blushes and Gerard laughs.

“So, don’t be stupid. You don’t have to feel guilty.” Gerard says and goes back to finish his ice cream. Frank looks down and bites his lip.

“Uh… So… I was wondering… A-Are we… B-Boyfriends?”

“What?” Gerard looks at Frank and laughs.

“S-Sorry, it was stupid, I just…” Gerard silents Frank with a kiss. He tastes like mint ice cream.

“Don’t be stupid” Gerard says “Of course we are. What made you think we _aren’t_?”

“W-Well you never...”

“Got on my knees or asked your mom for your hand?” the older boy rolls his eyes.

“N-No, that’s silly, who would want that…” Frank says, getting up to throw the ice cream on a trash can near them. Gerard is still looking at him.

“Oh god. You totally want that!” He laughs.

“What? No!” Frank frowns.

“Yes you do! It’s all over your face. Jesus, you are _really_ cheesy.” Frank is still standing up and crosses his arms, looking away from Gerard. The older boy puts his ice cream aside and walks to Frank, getting on his knees.

“Gerard get up! You are drawing everyone’s attention” Frank says, putting a hand on his face, embarrassed.

“Frank Iero, will you give me the honor to be your boyfriend?” Gerard says, his voice sounds very serious but his face shows very clear he is holding back his laugh.

“No! Fuck off. You are mean.” Frank says and runs to the car.

Gerard laughs, getting up on his feet. He couldn’t love this boy more.


	31. Chapter 31.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm happy to say that I got back to this fic faster than I thought and wrote more chapters <3 we really are made for each other after all.

On the next day, Gerard called Frank and they talked during the whole lunchtime; He asked Frank to wait for him _in_ school so he would be safer and also call him when he left the classroom. Frank thought it was a bit of overreacting but he was happy that the older boy cared for him. On the other hand, his mom wasn’t _very_ happy. All this years she got used to go from work to home just to be able to have lunch with Frank, since he was always so lonely. But now Gerard would pick Frank up from school. Even if it just happened for a day, she knew that when Frank asked to go out with Gerard on Tuesday too, it would happen every day. She's still not used with the idea of him growing up so fast.

_“Hello?”_

_“Hi Frankie. Are you leaving?”_

_“Yes Gee. I’m going to stay in the cafeteria. Just ring me and I’ll go outside, okay?”_

_“Sure, see ya later.”_

_“Okay, bye.”_

Frank looks around and sees everybody leaving. He sighs and decides to get some water. As he gets near the drinking fountain he notices that one of the classes is not empty; There’s a teacher there and a few students, and they seemed to be working on some ballet choreography. The teacher notices Frank was staring and walks to the door, with a inviting smile.

“Thinking about joining us? We have no problem accepting boys. We have about 7 here.” She says and Frank laughs softly.

“Not really, thanks. Dancing is not for me. But I was actually wondering if you know where Mr. Cohen’s class is?” Frank asks, he’s pretty sure the teacher told him but he forgot.

“Wow, Cohen? Most kids dislike him.” She frowns “He’s in class 203.”

“Thanks.” The teacher nods and goes back to her students. Frank bits down his lip, thinking… Gerard did tell him to _not_ help Mr. Cohen but then again, he really felt like he needed to. He’s sure Gerard would understand later when he gets calm.

Frank goes to the second floor and gets surprised as he finds room 203 empty. He walks in the class and looks around, trying to find a note or something, maybe they moved to another class.

“Hey! You came! Good.” He’s taken back in surprised as he turns around and Mr. Cohen gets in, with his suitcase. He puts it on his table and opens it, organizing his things. “Didn’t really expect you to.”

“Uh… W-Where is everyone else?”

“What you mean? We are here.” Mr. Cohen chuckles.

“So, you are working _alone_ on a project?”

“No, of course not.” He says, not really looking at Frank but mostly on the files he started to take out of his suitcase. “Rarely the kids come all the days we book. Especially now that Mrs. Addams started that Talent Show thing again. That woman knows her business.” He sighs.

“Uh… So what are we going to do?” Mr. Cohen looks up at Frank, taking his glasses off.

“Well, what _can_ you do?”

“Uh… Nothing really.”

“C’mon. There must be something you are good at.”

“Well… I like to write poems and take pictures. But I’m not really good, they are just hobbies. They can’t be taken seriously.”

“Saying that is like saying _you_ can’t be taken seriously” Cohen says and Frank shrugs “You should be more proud of your skills uh…”

“Frank. Frank Iero.”

“Yes, Frank. You know, an artist don’t just make a masterpiece from one day to another. Being good at something requires time, effort and practice. Practice means  _everything_.”

“Y-Yes sir.” Frank doesn’t really knows what to say, he just feels stupid.

“Well don’t just stand there. Sit down, show me the things you do.” Frank hesitates but puts a chair in front of Mr. Cohen’s desk, opening his backpack and getting his personal notebook. He bits down his lip before opening it… Nobody ever saw it besides Gerard. And well, he did like what he saw. But he’s still not sure if a _teacher_ should see it. It would be weird. “Frank?”

“A-Ah, yes.” Frank nervously open the notebook to the marked page where he glued some pictures he took months ago. “They are not good, sir.”

Mr. Cohen doesn’t say anything, just gets the notebook and looks at the pictures. He takes a long time analyzing each one and Frank looks down at his lap, unsure if that was a good thing.

“These are very interesting Frank.” Cohen says after some time and Frank looks up. “They are original and well portrayed. That’s good. The best part of being a photographer is being able to show people your own point of view. A single thing can have lots of meanings, depending how you see it.”

“T-Thank you sir!” Frank is surprised, he didn’t really expect that the teacher would extract something good from his amateur pictures.

“I do believe that with some classes, studying and practicing you’ll get much better.”

“Thanks.” Frank smiles.

“You did say you write poetry too?”

“Well, yes but I’m not very comfortable with sharing that now, to be honest.” Frank bits his lip and the teacher nods.

“Don’t worry, I won’t force you. Quite the opposite of what we are trying to achieve here, right?” Frank nods fast. “Well, very good Frank. I’m glad you decided to join us, we didn’t have a photographer yet. You’ll be very useful.”

“Hum… _Us_?”

“Oh, don’t worry. Now that I _finally_ got permission from the principal to turn this project participation to credits, they will come around soon. You’ll like to meet them.”

“Oh, okay then.” Frank says, he hoped the teacher was being serious, because the whole hallway is empty and he can't hear anyone coming around. Mr. Cohen was about to speak when Frank’s phone started to ring. It was Gerard. “Oh! Sorry, I have to go now.”

“Sure, sure… Well, I’ll see you soon I hope?” Mr. Cohen doesn’t really believe that the boy would return.

“Yes, I-I just came to let you know I want to help.” Frank smiles, getting his backpack and leaving fast. “Bye Mr. Cohen.”

“Bye Frank” The teacher tries to say but he’s not sure if the boy heard, he left in such a rush. He looks back to his desk and sees that the boy’s notebook is still with him. “Oh, Frank, wait! You forgot your…” He says running to the hallway but the boy is not around to be seen. He sighs.

 

**~~**

“Hi Gee!” Frank says, smiling and panting as he sees Gerard inside the car, the window half opened. It’s raining but Frank doesn’t care, just gets in the car fast.

“Wow, calm down. Running away from someone?” Gerard says half joking and half seriously.

“No, I just didn’t want to let you waiting.” Frank says, closing the door and putting his backpack by his feet. “Where are we going today?”

“Well Frankie, you probably ran so fast that no water drop hit you but it’s raining you know?” Gerard sighs, starting the car “It sucks, I wanted to take you somewhere different, for a change. But I guess I’ll just have to take you home.”

“No Gee!” Frank groans “Oh, c’mon. I waited the whole day to be with you. Let me stay at your house at least, pleeease?”

“My mom wouldn’t like that at all Frank.”

“But she’s at work. I can go back home before she arrives, promise.” Frank says, kissing Gerard’s cheek.

“Ugh, fine. But stop distracting me or I’ll hit the car!”

 

**~~**

 

The boys are in the kitchen, Gerard is cooking for them and Frank is sitting down using his phone when Mikey arrives; He seems angry as he throws his wet backpack and coat on the sofa. He goes to the kitchen as he hears the other boys talking.

“Oh, hey Mikey. You’re late. What happened?” Gerard asks as he turns the fire off and puts Frank’s omelet on a plate.

“What happened is that I don’t have a boyfriend with a car to pick me up.” He smiles sarcastically, sitting next to Frank as the boy gets the plate and starts eating. “Or to cook for me.”

“Trust me, it’s not easy. First he will hate you, hit you, get you drunk and…” Frank is saying until Gerard interrupts him.

“Eat!”

“So, when will you send your art project?” Mikey says, going to the fridge to get a slice of pizza from last night.

“Friday. They told me they’d answer in at least a month. If they like it, I’ll get to go to New York.” Gerard says but he doesn’t seem that excited. Frank notices.

“Is there something wrong with that?” Gerard sighs and sits in front of Frank.

“This is huge for me, and it’s getting more real now. Before it was like, months away so it didn’t seem like a big deal. But now I get more anxious every day. If I fail this, I have no idea of what will happen.” Gerard says.

“I’m sure it will be fine. Can I see it before you send it?” Frank smiles.

“No! That would make me more nervous” Gerard shakes his head “I know it’s weird but I don’t want to hear any opinions about it now. I just wanna let it happen.”

“W-Well, okay” Frank says a bit disappointed. “How much time would you stay in New York?”

“I’m not sure. Maybe two weeks? Actually I’m looking for a job now, they won’t cover the expenses.” Gerard sighs.

“Wow, that sucks” Mikey says “They are artists and they expect other artists to have money? How dumb is that?”

“Shut up Mikey!”


	32. Chapter 32.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey, we have a big chapter today. Sorry about so many "cuts".. I don't like to put a lot in the same chapter but as I said it's a big one so it's necessary =)  
> I've been having so many ideas for fanfics but my classes start in two days. Sighs
> 
> Hope you enjoy it!

Gerard and Frank are lying together on the sofa, watching some old TV show reprise, just holding each other until Gerard breaks the silence;

“Hey Frankie, why were you in such a rush earlier today?” He asks, caressing Frank’s hair. The boy coughs nervously.

“U-Uh… Nothing Gee. I-I was just in the bathroom… Uh, the upstairs bathroom.”

“Frankie, don’t lie to me.” Gerard sighs “It’s even embarrassing because you are a shitty liar.”

“Hey!” Frank sits up, pouting “Fine, I didn’t want to tell you since you’d be angry at me… I went to Mr. Cohen’s class to tell him I’m going to join his project.”

“What?” Gerard sits up too, with a frown “You are going to support the man that let me be bullied and acted like the problem was all on me?”

“Gerard, he regrets it” Frank sighs “Most teachers don’t care about it… He’s a nice guy. H-He asked to see my photographs and he said really good things, and that I have potential.”

“Of course he did, Frank. He’s trying to bring you into this stupid project!” Gerard says, very angry. “Ugh. Why won’t you listen to me?”

“What you mean? I-I, you said I was good.” Frank says a little sad.

“You are baby, I just… He’s not a good person so I don’t want you around him.” Gerard says.

“Trust me, okay? It’s just my way of saying thank you. And apparently I’d get a good use for my camera. It’s not like I’m busy the whole day. As you said, you’ll get a job and we won’t be able to spend the day together anymore.” Frank bits down his lip and Gerard thinks for a while.

“I guess you are right. But promise that when you finish doing your thing there you’ll just tell him to go fuck himself?” Frank laughs.

“No. But I promise I will do my best and maybe even try to give photography a chance, like you wanted to.”

“Well, it will do it for now.” Gerard says and kisses Frank.

 

**~~**

It’s about 6 pm when Frank is getting ready to go back home. He’s putting a drawing that Gerard made for him in his backpack and it’s when he realizes it’s a bit lighter than usual. He frowns.

“Gee?” He turns back to Gerard who was sitting on his bed reading a comic book “Have you seen my notebook?”

“Hum, no, I’m pretty sure I didn’t see you take it off here. Why?” He gets up and walks to Frank.

“It’s not here. Oh my god, I lost it, I can’t believe it” Frank feels desperate tears forming on his eyes and Gerard rubs his shoulder, trying to relax Frank as he sees the boy so upset.

“Calm down. Just think about the last time you took it off your backpack.”

“I don’t know, I…” Frank stops and thinks for some time. “Oh no! Shit! It was in Mr. Cohen’s class. It should be with him. But what if he didn’t see it and left behind? Oh no, someone is going to read it and make fun of me and I’ll turn into the joke of school…”

“Frankie, calm down!” Gerard chuckles “Don’t freak out yet.”

“How couldn’t I?! It’s not just my… pictures and poems, but there’s a diary there.” He bits down his lip. He knew he shouldn’t have written so many personal things there… It has so much stuff about Gerard… Oh god.

“Just find Cohen and get it back tomorrow, okay? I won’t be able to pick you up. My dad said his friend is looking for a cashier to his store. I’ll have to go there tomorrow after lunch.”

“Okay, okay.” Frank nods and sits on the bed. He can’t hide how nervous he is; He doesn’t want a stranger getting access to his personal life.

 

**~~**

Frank doesn’t even care about his mom complaining for making her take him to school earlier today, he couldn’t stop thinking about the notebook. He alredy accepted the idea that Mr. Cohen forgot about it and someone else took it, that way it was easier to mentally prepare himself for the bad news he would possibly get.

When he runs to the faculty lounge is when he finally stops to breathe and calm himself. He is about to knock on the door when he hears a voice behind him.

“Oh, good morning Frank! I didn’t expect you here this early” Frank sighs as he turns around to face Mr. Cohen holding a cup of coffee and his suitcase. “I guess you realized you forgot your notebook with me.”

“Oh yes, yes! Do you still have it?” Mr. Cohen laughs at the boy’s excitement.

“Sure, I kept it in my suitcase so I wouldn’t forget to give it back. Can you come back during lunchtime? As you can see my hands are busy right now and I’m late for the meeting, you can’t get in there now.” He says and Frank’s smile falls.

“O-Oh. Sure, sir. Thanks for keeping it for me.”

“No problem. See you later!”

 

**~~**

Frank got his notebook back during lunchtime but still decided to go to Mr. Cohen’s after class project. Gerard wouldn’t pick him up anyway so he might as well keep himself busy to not miss him too much and occupy his mind. He was surprised that as he walked inside the class there were other kids as well, working on their posters, paintings and even a song. Frank felt kinda lost especially since he left home in such a hurry that he forgot to take his camera with him.

He just walks around feeling lost when he feels a hand on his shoulder.

“Oh hi Frank, I didn’t know you’d join us!” He smiles relieved to see Katie, they always made group projects together in class.

“Hi Katie, well I just found out about it this week. I’m not sure how I’ll be helping you guys, but I really want to.” She smiles and is about to say something when Mr. Cohen approaches them, bringing a boy and a girl with him.

“I see you alredy met Frank, well this is Pete and Megan, they will be joining us as well. They take pictures just like you Frank” Frank smiles embarrassed because he’s pretty sure they are better than him at that and the teacher is talking as if he was so good at it. “So you all can discuss about it and think about something together. I won’t tell you what to do but for a start, maybe think about how affected the victims of bullying get and what makes a bully. When you come up with something you can call me and we discuss it better. I’ll be helping other groups that alredy have some progress done but no need to rush guys, nobody’s idea will be left behind.” They nod and the teacher leaves.

“So… Where’s your camera?” Pete asks and Frank sighs.

 

**~~**

 

They worked on ideas for the project until 4pm; Frank received a call from Mikey telling him the address of the store Gerard was working and told him to come along and get some free snacks. Frank’s pretty sure that Gee didn’t agree with that and chuckles at Mikey’s excitement. He goes to the bus stop and finds Pete there.

“Oh hey” Frank waves. It’s different to talk in a group and talk directly with the boy, he was still very shy. “So, it was very cool today huh?”

“Yeah, sure. But to be honest I think Mr. Cohen is having too many expectations about me. I’m not that good, I don’t even study for it…” Frank admits and Pete shakes his head.

“That won’t be a problem at all. I studied photography for the last few years, I can give some tips for you and Megan. That’s why we’re in a group, right?” He smiles and Frank smiles back. Thank god he wasn’t a pretentious asshole.

“Right, thanks. What made you want to join? The extra credits?”

“Not really, that’s not a problem for me.” Pete shrugs. “But I’ve been bullied in other schools so I know how much it hurts and destroys your self-esteem. I never had anyone telling me that, though. I found out the harder way” He sighs “So I want to make the victims aware of that so they can look for help to deal with it. Honestly, I think the focus should be on re-educating the bullies but…”

“Well, depends. Most bullies are also bullied at home by their parents or whoever was supposed to take care of them. They are also victims in a way. So if you really want to go for the roots, you should go for the parents.” Pete scoffs.

“Parents alredy think it’s a waste of time to come to hear teachers talking about their own kids, let alone other kids telling them they are raising their children wrong.”

“Yeah well, you got a point.” Frank shrugs. “For now, I prefer to focus on giving people some comfort I guess.” Pete nods, but he looked like he still had a lot to say. The bus arrives and Frank sees that he didn’t move so he gets his backpack up on his shoulder. “See you tomorrow!”

“See ya. Take care.” Pete waves and Frank gets in the bus.

 

**~~**

 

When Frank gets to the store things are pretty calm, just some kids buying a bunch of soda cans and bags of chips; he sees Mikey sitting next to Gerard behind the cash register and waits until the kids get their change and leave the store, then he walks closer. Gerard smiles instantly.

“Frankie, you came!”

“Well, sure.”

“Who would waste the opportunity to finally see Gerard Way working? Hey, take a picture Frank, let’s keep this moment for history.” Mikey says and Frank laughs. Gerard doesn’t look too happy with the comment.

“Yeah, says the guy who just sat by my side for 3 hours eating all the snickers possible.”

“Hey, I’m helping you. When the manager sees you sold a lot on your first day, he will even give you a raise.” Gerard scoffs.

“First of all, nobody gets a raise on the _first_ day working, this is not The Sims. Also, I’m a cashier not a salesman, I don’t go around offering chocolate to people.”

“Geez, way to be a pessimist.” Mikey crosses his arm.

“Uh… Can I get a pink lemonade please.” Frank says, getting his wallet from his pocket. Gerard shakes his head as Mikey goes get the pale pink bottle in the refrigerator behind them.

“It’s okay, you don’t have to pay for anything baby. Keep your money.” Gerard says and holds Frank’s hand that was on the counter, caressing it lightly. “Ugh, it sucks that I can’t hug you or kiss you right now. How was your day?”

“Well, just great and I did some…”

“Hey! Why I had to pay for all the chocolate I ate and Frank gets stuff for free?” Mikey complains and gives the bottle to Frank.

“It’s not for free, dumbass. I’ll pay for him because he deserves it and came to make my day better. You just came to annoy me. Also he just asked for _one_ thing, meanwhile you’re drowning yourself in chocolate.” Frank giggles.

“Still not fair.” Mikey says, going back to his seat.

“So, do you like working here?” Frank asks and Gerard shrugs.

“Could be worse. I’m just glad I don’t have to talk people into buying things, I’m terrible at that and would give up at the first ‘no’. But I’m glad I have a job, at least. I was very lucky to get it.” Frank smiles taking a sip of his lemonade “Hey, you still didn’t answer me properly!”

“Well, you two were busy discussing your relationship.” Frank says “It was good, I met some nice people there and we’ll work on a photography project together… I think in the end it will be some kind of exhibition with different approaches on the subject. I think it will be great.” He doesn’t know if Gerard is still mad at him for joying so he tries to be positive about it, but in reality he’s still not sure about what will happen, he didn’t talk to any other group yet.

“Good. Well, I have to stay more ten minutes. You two should wait me outside and take care of dad’s car.”

Mikey complains but takes Frank outside anyway. The sun is going down and they lean against Donald’s car, waiting for Gerard.

“Man, I still can’t even believe it when I see Gerard being such a dork around you. It’s like he’s a totally different person.” Mikey says and Frank smiles.

“Well, now he is finally himself. He’s acting like he wanted to, before. ” Mikey nods.

“You’re right. I can’t thank you enough Frankie. I don’t know if Gerard ever told you that, but I will. You’re the best thing that happened in his life so far.” Mikey says and Frank looks shocked, unsure of what to say. Mikey realizes that and smiles, leaning his head on Frank’s shoulder. “I hope you’re together forever.”

“Me too Mikey… me too.”


	33. Chapter 33.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey!  
> Sorry for the wait but I didn't get much time to just sit down and write. This fanfic is my baby and I try to be very careful with it.  
> This chapter got bigger than I though but to keep most chapters the same size and be more practical for the readers I turned it into 2 chapters, so I will post again soon
> 
> Honestly another reason why I took so long is that I spend some days writing new fanfics... Oh god.  
> I just kinda get bored of writing the same thing when I have lots of new ideas and try to write them all at the same time, but eventually I get bored of them as well. I know, crazy. But as I said before I won't post any new fanfic before finishing this one. I won't rush it either
> 
> Hope you enjoy!

Linda wasn’t able to transfer Frank to Mikey’s school, which made him upset for the end of the week. But some days later he was fine with it, he never saw those bullies again and he got really into the anti-bullying project. One day after they finished their work, Megan stopped him and Pete before they left school.

“Hey guys, would you like to get some coffee? I’m exhausted and could really use one right now.” She says and Pete nods.

“Yeah I really need it too. Also, it would be great to be able to discuss our ideas without Katie around” he rolls his eyes “she thinks she knows everything, it’s annoying.”

“Well if we come up with something we all agree on, she won’t be able to stop us. She’s not in charge, she just acts like it.” Megan laughs. Frank feels lost and it’s clear on his face how clueless he is. “You’ll come too, right Frank?”

“Oh, me?” He looks up at her “Well, I guess it’s okay.” She nods. He didn’t go to Gerard’s work every day anyway, he didn’t want to turn it into a routine, he liked surprising his boyfriend. Also, distracting him at work could get him in trouble.

“Let’s go then, I know a great coffee shop near here.”

 

\--

 

Frank felt kinda left out since both Megan and Pete had photography classes before, which he never did, and they had a lot to talk about. It was a hobby for him, nothing much. But he started to demand too much from himself since Gerard was pushing him into turning it his future profession. He doesn’t mind, after all he had no idea what he would do in college anyway.

The real problem is that he is not even sure about going to college, after all, his mom would be alone and for him it was unacceptable. He wouldn’t leave her like his dad did, even if it was for a completely different reason. She needs him and he knows it, they are too fond of each other to break their bond now.

“So Frank, you don’t talk much do you?” Pete asks and Frank blushes. He was completely lost on his thoughts all this time and had no idea what the two of them were talking about and it was rude to ask.

“N-No. I’m just kinda shy, sorry. I’m not used to having friends.” He says and looks down thinking how much of an idiot he sounded.

“It’s okay, you have nothing to worry about with us.” Megan says “Pete told me you don’t go to photography class?” Frank nods “Why not?”

“Well, I never took it seriously, it was just to pass the time. It was my dad’s hobby and one day he gave me his old camera and that’s how I started to take pictures… No cool back story.” He shrugs.

“Aw, that’s cute. You have an emotional reason to be attached to photography. Well, if you want I could send you some pdf books. I have lots of them about techniques, history of photography, angles, colors, focus…”

“Wow, really? Sure, I’d love that. I have the free time.”

“Great, you have my phone number, just text me your email and I’ll send it to you when I get home.”

“Thanks a lot Megan.”

“No problem.” She smiles. “Well guys, I gotta go now. I have to pick up my little sister in half an hour. Thanks for coming here with me. Ah Frankie, get used to talk because we want to hear more from you.” Frank blushes and nods.

“Bye Megan.”

“Bye Meg.”

“See you guys on Monday”.

Frank figures Pete will leave too so he just sits back staring at his now empty plate.

“So, what are your plans for the weekend?” Pete asks, looking on the menu. Frank frowns, why the hell was the boy staying? He barely talks anyway… He thought he came along just for Megan.

“Uh… I don’t know. I’ll probably hang out with my boyfriend.” Frank says and he doesn’t even think twice, but Pete doesn’t seem to be the kind of asshole that would hate him for being gay.

“Wow, didn’t expect that from you.” Pete laughs and Frank looks confused “I mean, you dating someone. You’re too shy, I can’t picture you dating.”

“Uh that would be kinda weird anyway.”

“I guess. I envy you” Pete sighs “I was supposed to go out with a guy this weekend but he turned out to be a fucking asshole… I’ll probably stay home all day crying and masturbating to his pictures.”

“Jesus.”

“That was kinda blunt, I know” Pete sits back on the chair and breaths deeply. “My life is so complicated right now. I came to a point where I don’t really care about stuff, but I feel I’m too young to feel like that... Did you ever felt that way?”

“Not really.” Frank shrugs. “Actually I care a lot.”

“Yeah I was like that one day, look how I am now. All alone.” Pete sighs and Frank feels uncomfortable with their way their conversation went but he realizes if the boy is venting like this to someone he met in such a short time, he really needs to be heard.

“Well, caring for my boyfriend is what made him realize how much he was hurting himself and needed to change his ways. Sure, it takes time. Huh, don’t I know it…And it can hurt lots of times. But at least in the end it’s worth it. When you act like you don’t care it’s easy … For some time. Then you go back to the start, you are hurt, alone and nothing changed for good. It’s the opposite.”

“Wow, that’s the most you talked in a week.” Pete laughs and Frank smiles embarrassed. “I like it. You should talk more, you’re smart. I’ll think about what you said when I don’t have so much caffeine in my brain.”

“Glad I could help somehow.” Frank shrugs.

 

~~

 

As Frank walks back home he wonders how him and Gerard could spend their weekend together. It’s different seeing him every day from seeing him mostly on weekends; they miss each other more, and have so much to talk about even though they still talk on the phone. It’s not the same and it upsets Frank but he would never tell Gerard that, after all he needs support right now and not someone putting him down. Also, it’s not like Frank is going to die for it, he knows Gerard’s going through a hard time and is very stressed about the art contest. If he doesn’t win, he won’t go to college and he basically has no other plans. Frank wishes he could help him make new ones but he can’t even make a plan ‘A’ for his own life.

Frank sighs and then sees Donald’s car in front of his house. His eyes widen and he runs to the car door, just to see that Gerard is sleeping –mouth wide open and head resting against the window. Frank laughs and knocks on the window. Gerard jumps on his seat and opens the passenger’s door as he sees Frank.

“Oh finally! I went to school to pick you up but there was nobody left. I knocked on your door and got no answer either.” Gerard frowns and Frank shakes his head, hugging him and kissing his lips lightly.

“Gee, are you crazy? It’s too dangerous to sleep in your car like this. I’m sorry, I was having some coffee with friends from the project thing. It wasn’t planned so I forgot to tell you.” Gerard nods, too sleepy to argue. Frank notices. He feels bad that Gerard worked the whole day and spent all the time he left work sleeping on the car waiting for him.

“It’s okay, I’m glad you’re making friends there. Nobody is bothering you anymore, right?”

“Yeah.” Gerard nods and just then Frank wonders if Gee was involved in the reason those kids weren’t bullying him anymore. He doesn’t want to question about it though, it’s not the time for that

“Hey” Frank caresses Gerard’s hair as the boy blinks slowly. “I’ll open the garage so you can park the car properly. Then we can go upstairs so you can rest, okay?” Gerard shakes his head.

“I can’t sleep here, I have to shower and make sure my spare uniform is washed for tomorrow.”

“It’s Saturday tomorrow, you don’t work” Frank rolls his eyes but smiles as he sees Gerard wide his eyes.

“Holy shit it’s true. Ok then, go open the garage and make sure you have at least five pillows on your bed.”

 

\--

Gerard lets out a deep sigh as lies on Frank’s bed and turns on his side to face the boy. There is no doubt he’s very tired and still sleepy.

“Hey” Frank smiles.

“Hey”

“I missed you a lot this week.”

“Me too.” Gerard closes his eyes for a few seconds and feels Frank caressing his hair. He just hums, burying his face in the pillow and enjoying the treatment. A few seconds later he feels a hand on his pants button and instantly opens his eyes. “Huh?”

“It’s okay, just r-relax” Frank blushes as he sits up on the bed, still trying to put Gerard’s pants at least down to his knee. The older boy frowns.

“What are you doing?”

“I-I wanted to try this again for a while now but we never have time together…” Frank bits down his lower lip “I know I’m probably not very good yet but-“

“Hey, you don’t have to” Gerard holds Frank’s hand that still tried to move his pants.

“I know but I _want_ to.” Frank pouts. Gerard shakes his head and sits up on the bed, pulling his pants up again and ignoring Frank’s frustrated sigh.

“I’m not in the mood…”

“I know you’re tired but you won’t have to do anything anyway, just lie back and…”

“No Frank, It’s just… I have something to tell you. Something that I’ve been keeping the whole week because I felt I should tell you personally.” Frank frowns.

“What is it Gee?”

“Well Frank, I didn’t want you to think that my mom would be an obstacle between us, I didn’t want to exhaust you with my family’s bullshit. But my mom was really giving me the cold treatment all this time and still giving me weird looks and comments…”

“God, just say it Gee! You’re making me anxious.”

“Fine.” Gerard sighs. “Let’s say that I’ve been gently invited by my parents to move out.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry if there are any grammar mistakes, I will read later and fix if there's any problems, but now I just have time to finish the end of the chapter. My classes started again :c


	34. Chapter 34.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello  
> pls don't feel offended if you live in the mentioned places lol  
> well it seems like we're coming to an end. It's the first time I feel this about this fanfic, it seems infinite to me, I love writing it XD  
> I'd say maybe more 10 chapters left? Depends on the time I'll have to write  
> Hope you enjoy it!

“What?”

“That’s right. My mom doesn’t want me home anymore and dad agreed. My grandmother is going through a hard time and she’s going to live with us… Well, _them_. In my bedroom.”

“That’s insane! They can’t do that! Throw you away with nowhere to go!” Frank gets really angry. How is it possible that Gerard’s parents can’t see the amazing son they have? “Things were just starting to get better… You got the job and…”

“Yeah, well, turns out that’s the real reason my dad got the job for me.” Gerard rolls his eyes. “They wanted me gone since the beginning. I still don’t have enough money to get my own apartment around here and pay bills regularly though. I’m actually very far away from that.”

“I still can’t believe it. How could your dad agree with this? I thought he was on our side.”

“My mom’s been really stressed with my grandmother being away and sick. She’s having problems at her saloon as well. I’m dead weight basically. But that’s not all I had to tell you…” He pauses for a few seconds, watching Frank’s anxious eyes but the boy kept quiet and waiting. “Of course we had a huge discussion that didn’t get anywhere, like always. Then later my dad came at me saying that he has friends in New York who are willing to get me a job. Nothing very different than what I do now, but probably at some restaurant or store.”

“Wait… So you’re going to New York _now_?” Gerard shakes his head.

“I didn’t give him an answer yet. He told me I have until Monday to think about it. Work opportunities don’t last long, especially in New York.” Frank nods.

“Hum…”

“So… What do you think?”

“W-Well… That’s great. You’ll start to get used to live in New York. It will be very helpful if you get to study there, which I’m sure you will.” Frank smiles. “Yeah, that’s great Gee. Also there are lots of art galleries there, you could go and maybe take your art and all…”

“Really…? That’s all you gonna say?” Gerard says sounding annoyed.

“What you mean?”

“Frank, don’t bullshit me. If I didn’t want your _real_ thoughts on this, I wouldn’t even ask.” Frank sighs.

“How do you think I feel? We’ll basically never see each other…”

“It’s not that far away-“

“Yeah but you’d only have the weekends available. But you’re going to be tired from working and taking care of your house on your own. You’ll have to go shopping… The trip would be tiring and eventually you’ll realize there’s no point to keep coming back here…” Frank bits down his lip trying to hold his tears. That’s not the right time to cry.

“What you mean?” Gerard frowns. “There _is_ a point to come back here. You.”

“Oh c’mon Gee… We both know it wouldn’t be the same. It’s not the same _now_ and we’re not even that far away from each other. How could we keep this relationship if we’ll live totally different lives?”

“Yeah, you’re right.” Gerard sighs. “I’m not going then.”

“Oh no, don’t do that, please. You can’t waste this opportunity because of me. I don’t want that. You deserve more.”

“Frank, I’m alredy not doing anything I’d like to so I can’t throw away the only thing I’m sure it’s right in my life right now- our relationship. I want us to last.” Gerard holds Frank’s hand. “You told me you didn’t want to be just another guy in my life. I don’t want that either. I don’t want any other guy.”

At this point Frank doesn’t even try to hold back the tears anymore. He regrets thinking that their current situation is bad- Gerard staying permanently in New York would be _way_ worse. It wasn’t the first time he feared that, though. If Gerard won his space in the contest to the art gallery he’d have to spend weeks in New York anyway. He could even get opportunities that would make him stay longer. What if he liked that too much? It surely had the environment to keep a young artist entertained and hungry for more. One day Frank could be going home from school and get a call from Gerard saying how much he loved that city and never wanted to go back to hellhole Jersey ever again.

But of course, that was just a reflex of Frank’s fears. He knew Gerard wouldn’t be such a dick with him-otherwise he wouldn’t date him in first place. He trusts Gerard. The fact he’s willing to stay for him just proves it again. But Frank’s not sure if he’s worth _all_ that. Gerard’s life is pretty complicated right now and a high school boy isn’t the one who’s going to solve it for him.

“Gee...” Frank smiles and holds Gerard tighly. “I love you so much… I want us to last too. But let’s think about it rationally. Where would you live?”

“Well of course I’ve been thinking about other options too, that’s why I decided to talk to you first. So, I’ve been looking for the cheapest places possible and I found an apartment in Passaic City with a very good price. I won’t lie, it does looks kinda shitty but…”

“Passaic… Really…?”

“What? It’s what I can afford for now.” Gerard sighs. “It’s either that or going to Camden.”

“Nevermind. Passaic sounds great.” Gerard just nods but still has the defeated look on his face. Frank can sense how unhappy he is and that hurts him not being able to help. Seeing Gerard like this makes him want to get a job and buy the boy a fucking mansion, but he has to be realistic. If Gerard didn’t get his chance in NY there is a big chance he’d spend the rest of his life living in a shitty apartment with a dead end job. Frank didn’t want things to end like that; he knows Gerard could do so much better. It’s not like that’s the last art contest in the world. Frank is sure there is much more waiting for Gee. “I’m thinking about talking to my dad about the apartment tomorrow. That is… If you agree.”

“Gee… Are you sure you can’t try to talk to your mom again? She seems out of her mind for a while now…”

“There is nothing to talk with her, Frankie.” Gerard shakes his head. “Nothing at all… To be honest, it was just a matter of time until all this happened. It’s not just about you and me but all these years I knew we wouldn’t end up well. When I move out I won’t want to see her ever again. And I’ll just see my dad because I need him to get the apartment, otherwise…”

“Don’t be like that. You’re just angry now but you’ll miss them. I know how it is, trust me.” Frank sighs “But what about Mikey? Does he know what’s going on?”

“No, not yet. Well, unless he overheard our conversations. I don’t want to bring him into this.”

“I see…I wish you could come live with us.”

“No, it’s alright. I need to start my life sometime. Your mom alredy has her concerns with you.”

Frank nods and lies down on the bed. It made him so angry that Lindsey got away with what she did. Well she got hurt, of course. But she messed up their lives pretty bad, especially Gee’s. It’s just not fair. Even if Gerard thinks things would end up bad between him and his family, it didn’t have to happen _now_. Not now that he was starting his own life.

“What if I got a job and we lived together” Frank says sometime later and Gerard laughs, lying next to him again.

“You should focus on school and your future college.”

“I’m not sure I want to go to college…” Frank says looking up at Gerard. He didn’t want to disappoint him and sound like a hypocrite but the idea of going away wasn’t appealing to him. “I don’t want to leave my mom here. I’m also not sure if I really want to be a photographer…”

“Well, I’m not the best person to give you advice on that.” Gerard sighs. “Don’t worry about your mom though. I’m sure she’s been preparing herself all these years for you to go away for college… Especially since you’re an only child.”

“I just don’t want to leave her alone.”

“Well… Who knows if she will be alone? She may meet someone else until there.”

“Maybe” Frank shrugs. “She wouldn’t tell me anyway. We tell everything for each other but when it comes to her personal relationships…Also she doesn’t have much time. She works so much… I worry about her.”

“Oh, she’ll be fine. You should worry about your future though. Hers is alredy stable.”

“You were so lost before… Now you’ve got it all figured out and here I am in your old shoes.”

“Who says I got it all figured out?” Gerard snorts. “I’m not moving out because I want to.”

“Yeah you’re right… Sorry.”

“It sucks that we’re so deep in our problems that we barely have time to talk just about… Us.” Gerard caresses Frank’s cheek and the boy closes his eyes. “God… I wish I had met you before. When I was younger…”

“Well I would be much younger and your mom would definitely kill you.” Frank laughs.

“Yeah. Nevermind, now you’ve ruined it.” Frank laughs harder at Gerard’s annoyed expression. “I just wish things were less complicated… I miss when I didn’t have to worry about life. When everything was so far away… You know, the responsibilities, getting old, growing up… It all seemed surreal. Now I’m being thrown into this madness and I regret so much not taking it seriously before. I could’ve prepared myself for the future. But I didn’t…”

“Can we not… Start talking about regrets all over again.” Frank sighs. “It’s done. We can’t go back in time now. And I believe things happen for a reason… Maybe you’ll be better off this way.”

“Huh. I doubt it.” Frank looks down, tired of the subject and unsure of what to say. Gerard gets closer and puts his arm around the boy. “Hey… I love you. Don’t forget that, okay? Even if things don’t go as planned, it will be alright because we’ll be together.”

Frank smiles and nuzzles Gerard’s neck. “I love you too Gee.”

He really did. Sometimes he’d get himself thinking about how much he loved Gerard and if their relationship could really last long –which wasn’t usual nowadays. He also didn’t have the best past experience with relationships. Mikey was his best friend and they got apart as they grew up; his dad seemed to love him but left as well. He got to the conclusion that staying with someone isn’t just about how much you love them, but how much you’re willing to sacrifice for them. And with Gerard he had no doubts. The boy really wanted to be with him. That was quite satisfying, not just for being a mutual feeling but he did have the fear of being alone and never falling in love with anyone. He didn’t stop himself from it like his mom used to think… It just seemed to never happen.

\--

When Frank wakes up Gerard is not there anymore; He doesn’t mind, he knows Gerard wouldn’t want Linda to know he spent the night there with Frank, even though they were just sleeping. He was still embarrassed that she heard their leaked audio. For Frank it’s hard enough to look at her and not think about it, let alone Gerard.

After taking a shower and having breakfast with his mom, Frank checks his email account to see if Megan sent the photography material. There it was: 12 pdf files and he downloads all of them; He thinks about what Gerard said about how he wishes he had prepared himself for the future… He might as well give a chance to the hobby, maybe it would work well and he’d get a passion for it.

Well, he didn’t _really_ believe that. When you’re supposed to be something, it just happens-at least that’s what he used to think. If you try to force it too much, it’s just a proof of how it’s not a good match for you. If it was, it would happen naturally. But he knows he has to think about his future, especially if he doesn’t want to end up like Gee –lost and confused about what’s coming next. He wishes it was easy to have it all figured out… But it’s hard to choose something for the rest of your life when you’re not even eighteen yet. For Frank it’s pretty clear you’d make the worst choice ever. Who knows themselves enough at such age? He envies people who do, if there are any.

After reading some pages of the basic manual of Photography, he starts to get tired. It’s too technical and detailed. He always preferred to learn in a practical way, it made him more interested which made him give it more attention. He gets his backpack and sits on his bed, looking for the magazine that Mr. Cohen gave him about Bullying. He gets it and his camera, putting it in his backpack and decides it’s time for someone to do something about this damn project.


	35. Chapter 35.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hii  
> I didn't have much time to write :( I wasn't even going to post this chapter because I'm still in the middle of the next one and I always prefer to write at least 3 before posting in case I want to change something but I figured this is pretty much how I want it to be now so
> 
> also it's hot as fUCK HERE I CAN'T THINK MY BRAIN MELTED
> 
> Enjoy

It’s around 3pm when Frank knocks on the Way’s house. Mikey opens the door with a big smile on his face.

“Frankie! Long time no see.”

“Ouch, you’re hurting me!”

“Sorry. I always forget you’re so tiny.” Mikey lets go of the hug and motions for Frank to get in. He does and sees Alicia playing videogames in the living room. “So how has it been at school?”

“Way better” Frank shrugs. “Hey Ali!”

“Hi Frank! Wanna play with us?” Alicia pauses the game and pats the spot next to her on the sofa.

“No thanks guys, I don’t want to interrupt. Where is Ray? Long time I don't hear about him.”

“Ah, he’s going out with a girl” Mikey rolls his eyes “You’re lucky you didn’t get to come to our school, man... They walk hand in hand all the time and she uses his hair as a pillow! It’s ridiculously cheesy.”

“Aw Mikey, face it. You’re just jealous because you’re single.” Frank smirks and Alicia laughs.

“No, I just had to stand you and Gerard’s cheesy bullshit for enough time. I’m sure I don’t any need more of it.”

“Mikey, who was it?” They all turn around to see Donna wearing her apron and a messy hair. “Oh, Frank.”

“Hi Mrs. Way.” He says timidly.

“Did you come to see Gerard? He just left a few minutes ago to buy me some things.”

“Uh, actually I came to talk to you, if you’re not too busy.” Donna frowns and so does Mikey and Alicia.

“Oh. Sure, we can talk. Just let me finish there, it’s quickly.” Frank nods and she goes back to the kitchen. Mikey looks at Frank still surprised.

“Frankie… You’re not pregnant, are you?”

 

\--

 

Gerard gets home and puts the shopping bag over the counter, frowning as he doesn’t see his mom around. He goes back to the living room where Alicia and Mikey are playing.

“Hey guys, do you...”

“Oh damn it Mikey, you were too fast again! I told you to wait for me.”

“God, it’s not my fault you’re so slow. We would’ve killed that monster in…”

“Uh, _guys_ ” Gerard says louder “Where is mom?”

“She’s upstairs with Frank. Ah, she told me for you to wait downstairs.”

“What? Frank is here? Talking to … _Mom_?” Mikey and Alicia nod, still concentrated on the game. Gerard sighs and goes back to the kitchen, there’s no point trying to get some information out of two nerd zombies.

He thinks about going upstairs and tries to overhear something but his mom is alredy pretty angry at him, so it’s better to not make it worse. He gets his phone and looks for more houses on the real state website. Unfortunately the shitty apartment in Passaic City is still the best option for him-or the least bad one. The good part is that it’s still close to his job and Frank, which wouldn’t happen if he moved to any other cheap places, they were mostly in the south.

He also checked his email but just read for the thousandth time the confirmation email from the art gallery, saying that his work got there and was registered successfully. Even being very anxious about it, he didn’t stop making other drawings. He also started to write little stories for them, giving dialogues for the characters. He draws a lot of him and Frank, and writes as if they lived together and travelled to very cool places all over the world. It was very simple and silly, too romantic for his own good so he preferred to keep for himself. Maybe one day he’d surprise Frank with one of them, he’s pretty sure the boy would love it.

He gets out of his thoughts as he hears someone coming downstairs through the kitchen.

“Gee!” Frank looks up at him and smiles.

“Hi Frankie” Gerard smiles too but he’s not sure if it’s okay to hug Frank in front of his mom that was coming right behind it. He doesn’t have much time to think though, Frank is alredy jumping on him and he’s not stupid to not hold him back. “When did you get here?”

“Not much time ago. We were just talking.”

“So Frank, will you stay for dinner with us?” Donna asks, putting her arm around the boy when he lets go of Gerard.

“Sorry Mrs-I mean, Donna, I can’t. I want to spend more time with my mom, I didn’t get to see her much this week.” He never does but it feels better to pretend it’s something that rarely happens. Donna nods.

“Well, feel free to come again.” Gerard frowns, feeling very lost. His mom never treated Frank bad, after all she though Gerard was evil and had corrupted the boy. But she wasn’t that intimate with him either, just polite.

“So Gee, we could go out tomorrow if you want. I’ll make all my homework tonight.” Frank looks up at him with his big shining eyes, along with a smile and Gerard knows that boy did something. He just knows.

“Uh, sure baby.”

\--

When Frank gets home he goes straight to his room and puts his backpack next to bed, taking out his textbooks to start doing his homework. It’s about 8pm and he gets up to get some snacks when he sees a note on the fridge.

_“Hi baby. I'm going out with a friend tonight so don’t wait me. There’s money on my nightstand, buy some pizza. Love, mom.”_

He sighs. If his mom had told him before he’d have dinner at the Way’s. He goes back upstairs and grabs his phone, calling Gerard.

“Hi”

“Hi baby. Everything okay?”

“Sure. I just wanted to know if you want to come over… My mom will get back late and I don’t want to be alone.” Gerard laughs.

“Well I’ll have to ask dad for the car keys first.”

“Okay I’m waiting. Love you, bye.”

“Love you too.”

Frank gets very nervous as he waits for Gee. He can’t help but think that they’ll be alone and probably in his bedroom so… He gulps as he looks in the mirror, he can see the fear in his eyes. He wasn’t entirely sure if he was ready to have sex but he’s pretty sure Gerard _has_ to be the first and hopefully only one to take his virginity. He blushes thinking about it as he steps in the shower. He didn’t want anything to go wrong on his first time.

About twenty five minutes later the doorbell rings.

He looks in the mirror one last time to make sure 'anxiety' is not all over his face and he runs downstairs to open the door.

“Hey!” He jumps on Gerard, holding him tight. It was so good seeing him after not being sure if they’d see each other tomorrow.

“Hi Gee. Come on in.”

Just then he realizes Gerard is holding a little white bag. It wasn’t transparent and Frank frowned. Gerard got there too fast to be shopping…

“What’s that?” he points to it and Gerard looks at the bag as if he didn’t know about its existence before.

“Oh. Just some stuff. Did you alredy eat?”

“No, I was about to order… Do you prefer pizza or Chinese?”

“Uh, pizza I guess.” Frank nods still not satisfied with Gerard’s previous answer but he grabs the phone and calls for his favorite pizzeria.

When he’s done, they go upstairs and Gerard lies down on Frank’s bed. The boy laughs.

“You’re _that_ tired? You didn’t even walk here.”

“No but I was just lying on my bed listening to music when you called, trying to fall asleep.” Frank smiles and hums, sitting next to him. “Hey Frankie… So you gonna tell me what you were talking with my mom earlier?”

“Nothing much.” Frank shrugs. Gerard sighs and sits up on the bed.

“Please don’t tell me you asked her to let me stay. I don’t want you into this mess.”

“No Gee, I didn’t. Relax. I wouldn’t do that without talking to you first.” Gerard nods but he looks more confused than before.

“What was it then?” Frank says nothing. “Oh cmon.”

“I alredy said it’s nothing much” Frank rolls his eyes, lying on the bed. “Goodnight.” He closes his eyes and pretends to be sleeping.

“I can’t believe I left my bed to come here so you can hide me stuff and pretend to be sleeping.” Frank tries to hold back his smile. “You’re so freaking lucky that you’re cute when you sleep.”

“No I’m not.”

“Yes you are.”

“Well wait until you see me drooling all over the pillow. And your hair.”

“Ew.” Frank laughs, opening his eyes again and he jumps back a little from how close Gerard is to him, their noses almost touching. “You better make it up for me.”

“How?” Frank can’t take his eyes of Gerard’s lips, they look so thin but soft at the same time.

The doorbell rings.

“With a big slice of pizza.” Gerard blinks an eye at him and gets up on the bed. Frank sighs.

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you guys like it! I'm excited about posting it.


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